They tried to warn us with cooties, but no...

Dequibenzo · #1 07-13-2002, 04:21 AM

Someone please tell me that they've experienced this too, so I know I'm not going insane.

Why is it that when you fall in love, specifically the unrequited kind, your first instict is to want to tell absolutely everybody EXCEPT for who you're actually in love with? What purpose does this serve, that everyone but who you've fallen for know it? And, if you actually do build up the guts to tell her, why is every single possible answer she can give you, no matter how clear or well-stated, so damn confusing? It could be "No, sweet Jesus, leave me alone you perverted monkey!" or "Yes, yes! I love you too, thank god you said it, thank god!", and you'd still be trying to figure out the situation. In short- what the hell is wrong with us!?
Why is this love business so laced with self-doubt and mind-crippling confusion, and how on earth do you deal with it!? Is it just me!? Does it come naturally to everyone else, and they never have doubts or deep moral issues that spring up around this sort of thing? That's how it seems in the movies and on TV- you meet the person, and you just kind of know right off the bat. That sounds incredibly stupid, but if it is how it works, I might as well shove my head in the blender right now.
(*poses finger over puree butten, gets cranium ready for desperate action if nobody responds*)

Wolfpac · #2 07-13-2002, 08:24 AM

Well the reason why people don't tell their true feeling to someone they care about is because they are afraid of the answer they might get. I could think of nothing worse than telling someone "I Love You", only to get a "Sorry, but I don't love you" response. Even if you have been going out for a year, you are still not sure if the other person loves you or not.

And tip; don't believe what you see on TV or at the Movies. The only reason why they don't have any trouble is because they get payed to say it.

Now get those fingers away from that blender now

Danny · #3 07-13-2002, 10:05 AM

God knows how it works. I'm still trying to work it out. My girlfriend, Sandy, broke up with me a couple of weeks ago, and I still can't stop thinking about her, but I don't know whether I should tell her how I feel. I mean, I know she doesn't feel as strongly for me, so I can't think of any way in which telling her how I feel might be a good thing. Either she'll gently but firmly let me down, in which case I've ruined our friendship (because how could she feel comfortable being friends with someone who's obsessed with her?), or even worse, she might actually get back together with me just to stop me being miserable, which just wouldn't work out. That's why I don't tell her.

In short: I haven't a clue how the whole thing works.

LuxoJr · #4 07-13-2002, 11:43 AM

Love works so damned well in movies because the directors just stick their own relationship fantasies up on the screen for us to stare at. If anything, I'd say it shows that they're the same as everybody else!

PinkHaired Mudokon CWR · #5 07-13-2002, 01:00 PM

Once you dated and break up, things won't really be the same as they use to. Especially when you date one of your best friends. But I'm pretty old fashion. I allow a guy to come up to me and tell me how he feels about me. I think it's best for guys to do it, like it's best for guys to proposed to you when he wants to marry you. SOmetimes if I like a guy, I watch him to see if he's really my type, preventing him from noticing that I am watching him. See if it's just a phase and sometimes I find out that he's either vain or aggressive and I'm like oh no dude.

I also agree with wolfpac, people really don't tell how they feel because they are afraid of being rejected. Also, they might mock you and tell their friends about it. My friend, she wrote a letter to a guy she liked. He laughed, made fun of her and told all of his friends. She was so embarrassed and I wanted to beat him up because she's my best friend but she was like "No, NO, I will deal with him"

Jacob · #6 07-13-2002, 03:28 PM

Rejection is the main fear, unless your arrogant. However i can tell loadsa girls that i love them and they'd say it back. I am also getting married to a few...which is ego boosting for me. Basically what i do is befriend a girl (It helps if your a little girlie yourself) and then as the friendship gets stronger you start to be sweeter, telling her that you love her and stuff. And if you are sure she feels the same way, ask her out. However, if she doesn't...make her into your drinking buddy and both get a bit drunk and then go in for the kiss...it might change things for the better and it might not change anything. Girls are a strange sex, not that, thats a bad thing...most of them are on my wave length and i worship them for that. Its when you get the ugly girls flirting with you is the time to be worried.

PinkHaired Mudokon CWR · #7 07-13-2002, 03:34 PM

We are the same when uglt guys tend to flirt with us. Eeeew. Or the so called "Mutt Rule."

ZombieX · #8 07-13-2002, 03:45 PM

:

Originally posted by PinkHaired Mudokon CWR
But I'm pretty old fashion. I allow a guy to come up to me and tell me how he feels about me. I think it's best for guys to do it, like it's best for guys to proposed to you when he wants to marry you. SOmetimes if I like a guy, I watch him to see if he's really my type, preventing him from noticing that I am watching him. See if it's just a phase and sometimes I find out that he's either vain or aggressive and I'm like oh no dude.

This old fashioned nonsense. It's just so that girls don't have to go to all the trouble of asking the poor guy out.

That's what I think anyway.

:

Originally posted by Jacob
Rejection is the main fear, unless your arrogant. However i can tell loadsa girls that i love them and they'd say it back. I am also getting married to a few...which is ego boosting for me. Basically what i do is befriend a girl (It helps if your a little girlie yourself) and then as the friendship gets stronger you start to be sweeter, telling her that you love her and stuff. And if you are sure she feels the same way, ask her out. However, if she doesn't...make her into your drinking buddy and both get a bit drunk and then go in for the kiss...it might change things for the better and it might not change anything. Girls are a strange sex, not that, thats a bad thing...most of them are on my wave length and i worship them for that. Its when you get the ugly girls flirting with you is the time to be worried.

You must be quite the sex god!

Juggled with your secret partner, this forum. 1115 posts in six months, as well as this massive love life going on!

Hey, have you got any more great tips? And I agree, girls are a strange sex.

Dequibenzo · #9 07-14-2002, 06:59 PM

Well, it's nice to know that widespread confusion is in fact the norm in this situation. Sigh, I have never been so frigging unsure about my own thoughts, but there's some comfort in knowing that's not too weird. Thanks, compadres.
(*puts blender back in cupboard... for now*)

Majic · #10 07-14-2002, 07:29 PM

Two theories:

Its just a huge evil plot designed by the females of the planet. They run around in packs giggling, just to see the sole brave man to come up against embarassing odds

The second is to tell a secret to someone who you know will tell it as a secret to someone and so forth. Then the person finds out and they track you down, little chit chat, and you go away rejected or preparing to be rejected after bout 3 weeks. Rather simple.

I personaly think the first is more probable

Jacob · #11 07-14-2002, 07:51 PM

:

Its just a huge evil plot designed by the females of the planet. They run around in packs giggling, just to see the sole brave man to come up against embarassing odds

Thats true. Although women are looked upon as the weaker sex, they are infact the stronger. Their ability to get what they want by just flirting makes them powerful, their ability to use their emotions to get their way makes them powerful, the fact they can go mths, yrs, millenia's without sex makes them powerful. But the biggest power they wield is the fact they can talk openly about anything...

And just remember, men may have vast powerful armies, gigantic nukes and other missiles but women...women have PMT

Sl'askia · #12 07-14-2002, 08:07 PM

Yer a little off there Jacob....its PMS not PMT

. Be afraid...be very afraid...MWHAHAHAHAHAHA!

PinkHaired Mudokon CWR · #13 07-14-2002, 09:11 PM

:

Originally posted by ZombieX

This old fashioned nonsense. It's just so that girls don't have to go to all the trouble of asking the poor guy out. That's what I think anyway.

No, it's best for a man to ask a girl out because if it was a girl asking a guy out, it looks improper, desperate and just strange. We are considered the delicate in some cases and the classy type. If a guy does sex with a girl, he considered "The man", but if it was a female, they would call her a "Two dollar ho" or a slut or cunt. I think it looks better for a guy to ask a girl out. It's the manly thing to do. Some things are not meant for girls (like those over-steroid weight champion women who have bigger muscles than men, which looks queer! LOL)

Jacob · #14 07-14-2002, 09:45 PM

:

its PMS not PMT

Post Menstral Stress...Post Mentral Tension...Both work *Shrugs*

Danny · #15 07-15-2002, 07:26 PM

:

Originally posted by Jacob
Post Menstral Stress...Post Mentral Tension...Both work *Shrugs*

I think PMS is the Merkin version, and PMT the Brit, but the two are becoming more and more interchangeable...

ZombieX · #16 07-16-2002, 06:47 PM

:

Originally posted by PinkHaired Mudokon CWR

No, it's best for a man to ask a girl out because if it was a girl asking a guy out, it looks improper, desperate and just strange. We are considered the delicate in some cases and the classy type. If a guy does sex with a girl, he considered "The man", but if it was a female, they would call her a "Two dollar ho" or a slut or cunt. I think it looks better for a guy to ask a girl out. It's the manly thing to do. Some things are not meant for girls (like those over-steroid weight champion women who have bigger muscles than men, which looks queer! LOL)

Okay, you win.