Here is a quote from todays online diary (which currently isn't online. I need to find a place for it first. I'd rather keep it seperate from my main site.):
today I went to Francois's funeral. Had to walk to the cemetry, cross country. We missed the service (which was at the crematorium where my dad was cremated when he died in 1997. It was too far away to walk to), and was 20 minutes late for the burial, but I did see them lower the coffin in from a distance. It was weird, as I wasn't depressed at all when I was walking towards the gathering of people around his grave, but as soon as a got there. . . I suddenly felt depressed. Everyone was crying and stuff. Oh well, his family seem to be taking it well, execpt for his grandmother. She was quite distrought, and when I comforted her, she found it hard to let go. It's scenes like that which greatly dent my morale. Anyway, I walked up the the grave, alone, and said to Francois: "Well, hi. I'm sorry I never got to say goodbye whilst you were alive, but still. . . Think positive thoughts, and have a nice afterlife, if there is one. I'll see ya soon, Francois. Take care. . ." And then I did my wink and thumbs up (which I do on MSN Messenger). Everyone was too busy comforting each other, so they didn't see or hear me say that to him. Our last private moment together, I think. Anyway, one of Francois's friends gave me and my mum a lift back home. I should of gone over to Francois's house afterwards to talk about him with everyone, but I didn't have time, unfortunatley, which I regret. However, I'll get to do that when they invite me and my family round for Christmas. I will visit his grave everytime I go past the cemetry. I never actually got to see his gravestone, but I know where he is buried. As for my dad, his ashes are in a small, heavy wooden casket on the windowsill of the kitchen table, so I see him everyday.
- DH
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