"I'm staunchly atheist, I simply don’t believe in God. But I'm still Catholic, of course. Catholicism has a much broader reach than just the religion. I'm technically Catholic, it's the box you have to tick on the census form: 'Don't believe in God, but I do still hate Rangers..'"
I'm serious, too. I am literally surprised and taken aback every time I see someone post it anywhere. It's so clearly unfunny that I don't even understand why someone would think it was funny.