Fifteen's Tale - Deja View

[AlexFili]

Fifteen's Tale - Deja View

== CHAPTER 1 ==

“Speech, speech, speech!”, the rowdy slig crowd chanted. The dusty battle-hardened slig veteran uneasily gets to his feet. He looked around at the large crowd several times while approaching the microphone stand. He taps the microphone a few times to check that it works, it does. He then begins his speech. “My fellow sligs, today we have totally decimated our enemy. We have shown that we're smarter, more powerful and more deserving of this victory”, he held his fist in the middle of the air. “Here here!”, the crowd of sligs chant.

The veteran continues grimly. “I'll admit, we lost lives and some of our friends didn't make it. But what's important is this. We never gave up and we never doubted our beliefs. Thanks to your valiant efforts, we secured the Balthazar Mint and now our economy is safe from the tyranny of the Black Brotherhood” The veteran took his time to pace around the podium and look at each slig individually, as if he was personally talking to each and every one of them.

“Our victory today... WILL be remembered for generations to come. You've set an example to sligs all throughout Mudos. So for that, I personally offer my congratulations. And so, we now raise a toast to our fallen heroes whom we lost today” At this, the entire crowd of sligs picked up their tankards and held them up at the sky. “To my most dedicated generals, Two, Four and Five. We salute you. TO OUR FALLEN HEROES”

All the sligs raised their tankards. “TO OUR FALLEN HEROES”, they all said in unison and drank. 'This tastes a little bitter', Fifteen thought to himself. Seventeen walked up to Fifteen and patted him on the back. “Good win eh? Let's get drunk tonight” Fifteen smiled, “Sure, nothing special happening tonight” And so, Fifteen drank a beer, and another... and another...

Day Three

“Ugh”, Fifteen moaned lazily. “What time...”, he mumbled before looking at the clock on the wall. It was 6 O'Clock, in the afternoon. The date on the calendar was Tuesday. “Aww heck, the victory was on Sunday. I've been asleep for that long? Heck...”

He moaned as he massaged his head. He had a bad hangover and a banging headache. It was about 8 O'Clock before he managed to get out of the barracks and to the mess hall. It was far too late to do any proper work, so he looked at a newspaper at the local stand. He began reading the paper and then gasped. “The brave slig veteran Danzig has been... murdered?!”

He dropped the paper in shock and then slowly picked it up again. He unwillingly read the rest of the article. “Danzig was known to have been hanging around with a group of high-ranking sligs before someone broke into the camp early on Tuesday morning. Six sligs were injured in the raid, two of which are in a critical condition in the Redanza Slig Medical facility”

One of them would have been Sixteen, Fifteen's roommate who doubled as one of Danzig's secret bodyguards. Fifteen had to see him today, no matter what. He put all his personal needs out of the picture for now. He took a bite of an Opple before heading over to the RSM.

Sixteen wasn't critically injured but his condition still made Fifteen worry for him. On his way out, Fifteen took a look at a bed nearby, in which Thirteen lay. He was the unluckiest slig who ever lived. Today he had the bad fortune of slipping on a Scrab Cake wrapper and ended up knocking over a greeter which caused him additional injury. Fifteen made his way to bed back in the barracks where he'd have a nice, long sleep.

== CHAPTER 2 ==

Day Four

“Ugh, Wednesday already”, he moaned, as he got up out of his bunk bed and put on his pants. He took a quick glance at the newspaper he had found yesterday and then left.

Wednesday was usually the day when all of the goods would come in. They would be loaded onto the train platform and then delivered to the factories who needed the spare machine parts and other items. In his morning shift, Fifteen loaded several crates onto the large diesel train waiting nearby and then headed to the lunch hall.

Nineteen came over and said, “It's busy today. Unusually busy” Fifteen nodded, “Yeah, it gets like that sometimes. Tough day?” Nineteen shook his head, “Not so bad, not so bad. Can't complain. Pint on Friday?” Fifteen smiled. “Yeah yeah. See you”

Before he knew it, it was Fifteen's turn to use the teleporter which would take him to the nearest factory, Waffop Wagons. The sligs spend a few days there before coming back to their own factory and barracks here at Shrow Piping. “Fifteen”, the announcer said into the megaphone. Fifteen walked up to the teleporter, gave the thumbs up and pulled the lever.

'Something's not right', he thought to himself. It felt different this time. Instead of the warm fuzzy glow, he felt a kind of cold wind sweep over him. “Hey, something's wr-” Suddenly, Fifteen was cut off as the lever was pulled and he was zapped. Only, he didn't end up exactly where he wanted to be.

Day One

“Speech, speech, speech!”, the slig crowd chanted. The battle-hardened slig veteran uneasily gets to his feet. Fifteen woke up, still clutching his head and clearly dazed “Where the heck did I go?” He looked around, “Another party? Wow, our profits are going straight down the drain this year”

The veteran continued to speak as Fifteen got to his feet “... we have totally decimated our enemy. We have shown that we're smarter, more powerful and more deserving of this victory”, the veteran held his fist firmly in the air. “Here here!”, the crowd of sligs chant. Fifteen looked around more closely now, “This looks so familiar”. He turned around and saw Nineteen and Seventeen there, but he was surprised to see Sixteen and Thirteen there. 'Healed so soon, how can that be? Hang on, why are we back in Shrow? Didn't we get in the teleporter?' All these questions were hurting his head so he held it for about a minute and closed his eyed.

Fifteen was very confused by all of this. He continued listening to the veteran's speech, though he was getting even more confused as time passed by, “Thanks to your valiant efforts, we secured the Balthazar Mint and now our economy is safe from the tyranny of the Black Brotherhood” Fifteen couldn't believe his ears. “I... I went back in time?”

[Oddey]

The scent of an interesting plot is being formed. Not only that, I feel some of your writing has certainly improved.

[enchilado]

The grammar is a bit weird, mainly around closing quotation marks. You should do it like this:

“Speech, speech, speech!” the rowdy slig crowd chanted (rather than !”,).
“TO OUR FALLEN HEROES,” they all said in unison, and drank (rather than ”,)

Basically, the only punctuation you should ever put after a closing quotation mark is a parenthesis.

Also, 'decimate' means 'reduce by one tenth'.

[AlexFili]

I've never been trained to write fiction so that would explain my mistakes. I'll try and work on that in the future.

[AlexFili]

More text!

== Chapter 3 ==

Day One (continued)

Fifteen shook his head a few times quickly and then thought to himself. 'What can I do? First thing's first, I definitely don't want to get drunk and miss all the action again'

All the sligs raised their tankards. “TO OUR FALLEN HEROES”, they all said in unison and drank. 'That probably tastes a little bitter if my memory serves me right', Fifteen thought to himself. Seventeen walked up to Fifteen and patted him on the back. “Good win eh? Let's get drunk tonight” Fifteen smiled, “Heck yeah!” Fifteen filled up his beer and while Seventeen wasn't looking, spilled the drink all the way down his chest. Fifteen pretended to act drunk and pretty soon, all the sligs were wobbling and falling over each other. Fifteen then moved out of the way and to a quieter area.

'First of all' he thought to himself, 'I've got to make sure that Danzig keeps out of harm's way, now where could he be...' Fifteen looked around, if Danzig was anywhere, he would be in the officer's quarters. Fifteen slowly walked over there, listening for any unusual sounds. A bottle smashing made Fifteen flinch and look around, but it was only a drunk slig who had lost control of their bottle as they fell asleep on the ground.

Fifteen was quite alone as most of the other sligs were clearly partying like never before. He managed to find Danzig's quarters. Inside were the six sligs assigned to guard him, including Sixteen. “Hey Sixteen” he said in a hushed tone. Sixteen walked over. “Hey Fifteen, something up?” Fifteen nodded. “Look, I think Danzig is in danger. I just have a bad feeling about Tuesday morning” Sixteen looked at the clock on the wall. “Well, in about thirty minutes, it will be morning”

Fifteen looked around cautiously, “In that case, we need to get moving pronto. Can you think of something to say to Danzig?” Sixteen nodded, “Leave it to me, I know just the thing...” Before they left, Fifteen set up a hidden security camera so that it would keep an eye on the local area. 'I'll check the tapes tomorrow', he thought.

Day Two (early morning)

“FREE SCRAB CAKES IN THE MESS HALL” Sixteen yelled. Fifteen was surprised to see Danzig and his bodyguards get up and make ready to leave. “Wow” he said, “It can't believe that worked. That's all you had to say?” Sixteen chuckled, “Well after a massive speech like that, everyone needs food right? Besides I can hack into one of the vending machines for free food!”

Sixteen used his technical skills to open the vending machine and dispense lots of snacks and treats. He spread out all the food, pretty soon all of the sligs gathered around the table, one of them took out a battered deck of cards. Fifteen walked up to the metallic doors and tapped a locking code on the display. The outer lock was enabled, this meant that the door could only be opened from the inside. Fifteen saw a Greeter nearby. “Probably better if I activate this thing, just in case” Fifteen breathed a sigh of relief and sat down to play carts with the other sligs.

Day Two (late morning)

Fifteen rubbed his eyes and got up. He could see a few other sligs with their heads on the table. Danzig was talking to one of his bodyguards who was still wearing their chainmail top. It appeared that the plan to protect Danzig has worked. At the moment, Fifteen was still oblivious as to who had planned to murder the veteran. Then again, he could have just as easily been injured trying to apprehend whoever it was. Besides, the security tapes would reveal all... hopefully.

There was a knock on one of the doors. Fifteen walked up to it, entered the unlocking code and saw Thirteen, the unluckiest slig walk in. “Oh hi guys, I see you had a little party-” Fifteen saw it in slow motion as Thirteen's mechanical foot rested on a Scrab Cake wrapper. Thirteen slipped and then knocked into the Greeter. “Ow ow ow” he moaned. The Greeter uttered a high pitched “What?” and was knocked over onto it's side. “He looks kinda beat up, better get him to the RSM”, one of the bodyguards said.

Fifteen nodded and picked up Thirteen by the elbow, helping him to his feet and then leading him to the RSM for treatment. Suddenly Fifteen remembered how Thirteen ended up in the RSM in the first place. 'Hang on... That Scrab Cake wrapper! Was that just a co-incidence? Or did I just MAKE the future happen?'

== TO BE CONTINUED... ==

[Oddey]

IC: I feel like I am reading Time Cop in a book form, on Oddworld, with a flair of AlexFili.

[AlexFili]

OOC: Thanks

== Chapter 4 ==

Day Two (evening)

With nobody to interrupt his work, he got it all done in about half the time.
Now that was out of the way, he could go check those security tapes. It took quite a long time because the fast forward function still only multiplied the speed by a factor of 5. Fifteen was on his third coffee when he noticed the bit of the footage he wanted to see.

"That's Danzig there, there's his bodyguards... and there's me talking to Sixteen" Now it was the moment when the culprit would be revealed. The scene was empty for some time, and then a figure appeared. At first Fifteen could only see him from the back, but then he turned. Fifteen almost spilled all of his coffee. "It's... Two!"

Day Three
With the photographic and videographic evidence, it was pretty clear that Two was guilty. He brought the evidence to Danzig and told him everything. "Unbelievable" he said. "I could have sworn they found Two's body, but then again, it was such a mess in that warzone. We barely had time to bury most of our side, let alone hold proper funerals"

Danzig sighed, "No matter, we have to make it to the armory quickly before Two gets access to the weapon store" Danzig and Fifteen ran to the armory, they got there just as Two closed the doors. Danzig used his high authority pass to open the door and he got in the Armory. Inside, there were racks of guns, grenade boxes and many other deadly weapons or war.

== Chapter 5 ==

"Long time no see, he-who-was-called One" Two had a grim smile on his face and was already moving towards the weapons. Danzig yelled, "Get him!" Fifteen ran around to the other side of the rack while Danzig charged at him head on and tackled him. A fierce fight broke out. Two punched Danzig twice, while Danzig attempted to slam Two up against the wall. Two meanwhile ducked and gave Danzig a gut punch. Danzig tried to kick Two, but Two moved back and instead threw Danzig into a gun rack, knocking the guns to the floor.

Fifteen swung the nearest rifle at Two. Two took the blow and then wheeled around and proceeded to move closer to Fifteen. Fifteen punched Two several times, but he was too weak to do major damage. Two landed some heavy hits on Fifteen, causing Fifteen to back off and stand up against one of the gun racks near the armory door. Two laughed and aimed a pistol at Fifteen. Fifteen gulped, Two pulled the trigger. At that moment, Danzig had shoulder-barged Two, causing Two's aim to veer wildly to the side and he missed Fifteen's leftmost tentacle by a few inches.

Danzig lay into Two with a series of rapid jabs to the stomach. By the time Fifteen saw Two again, he was laying on the floor. Danzig picked up a pair of handcuffs and slapped them on Two's wrists. "Gotcha"

As Two was being taken into custody, Fifteen walked over to Danzig. "What was all that about?" Danzig looked at Fifteen and sighed. "That guy was always after my position. He just couldn't accept the fact that I was the first one to be made a general. He's been fighting his way up the career ladder ever since. I'd think he was trying to wait until I snuffed it, but then when I didn't, he decided to take matters into his own hands" Fifteen shook his head, "Lucky we were there to stop him"

Day Four
The technicians were examining the teleporter. It didn't seem particularly faulty then again, appearances can be deceiving. After a few trial runs, they waited and then suddenly the machine started acting strangely and distorting. If this happened at Shrow Piping. What would happen at other places? What would happen at Waffop Wagons?

= End of Fifteen's Tale =

OOC: Thanks for reading my story. I'm ending it for now because I'll be going away for the summer. Please let me know what you liked and didn't like. I have other plans for time travel which I will write about in the near future.

[Oddey]

As Alex takes a bow, the crowd applauds with a commendable strength.

I am in the crowd.

[AlexFili]

Why thank you. Many happy holidays to you and your kin