37 facts of life

[One, Two, Middlesboogie]

Found these on another board. Add your own!

1) Moles are always smaller than you imagine.
2) At the end of every party there is always a fat girl crying.
3) One of the most awkward things that can happen in a pub is when your pint to toilet cycle gets scynchronised with a complete stranger.
4) You've never quite sure whether its ok to eat green crisps.
5) Everyone who grew up in the 80's has entered the digits 55378008 into a calculator.
6) Reading when you're drunk is horrible.
7) Sharpening a pencil with a knife makes you feel really manly.
8) Your never quite sure whether it's against the law or not to have a fire in your back garden.
9) Whatever your age the desire to make plastic dolls shag is almost impossible to resist.
10) Nobody ever dares make cup a soup in a bowl.
11) You never know where to look when eating an apple.
12) Its impossible to describe the smell of a wet cat.
13) Prodding a fire with a stick makes you feel manly.
14) Rummaging in an overgrown garden will always turn up a bouncy ball.
15) You always feel a bit scared when stroking horses.
16) Everyone always remembers the day a dog ran into your school.
17) The most embarrassing thing you can do as schoolchild is to call your teacher mum or dad.
18) The smaller the monkey the more it looks like it would kill you at the first given opportunity.
19) Some days you see lots of people on crutches.
20) Every bloke has at some stage while taking a piss flushed half way through and then raced against the flush.
21) Old women with mobile phones look wrong!
22) Its impossible to look cool whilst picking up a frisbee.
23) Driving through a tunnel makes you feel excited.
24) You never ever run out of salt.
25) Old ladies can eat more than you think.
26) You can't respect a man who carries a dog.
27) Theres no panic like the panic you momentarily feel when you you've gotten your hand or head stuck in something.
28) No one knows the origins of their metal coat hangers.
29) Despite constant warning you have never met anybody who has their arm broken by a swan.
30) The most painful household incident is wearing socks and stepping on an upturned plug.
31) People who don't drive slam car doors too hard.
32) You've turned into your dad the day you put aside a thin piece of wood to specifically stir paint with.
33) Everyone had an uncle who tried to steal their nose.
34) Bricks are horrible to carry.
35) In every plate of chips there is a bad chip.
36) Triangle sandwiches taste better than square ones.
37) Beneath every floating balloon is a tearful child.

[ February 01, 2002: Message edited by: One, Two, Middlesboogie ]

[Surfacing]

I don'tr get number 5 , explain it.

[Shinjara]

Ok...I think i understand number 5 so ill try to explain it.

When you type 55378008 in a calc and turn it upside down you'll see the results, its kinda of an old joke so i think thats what it means.. :confuzzled:

Oh yea the best ones are 33,2,8,30 and 9...

[ February 01, 2002: Message edited by: Shinjara ]

[Robbo]

I've done 5316006....................

Why can't you respect a man with a dog? how about if the mn was 7ft 6 and the dog was a 5 foot, growling wolverine monster covered in blood. And the leash was a rusty, oily chain. And the man drove a motorbike. And he was competing in a cross-country bike race. With crowbars.............

[dark_xinos]

Okey... 1)Droping you're blankit on the floor during the night and waking up shivering is awful. 2)You can tell when someones been up two nights in a row. Ney. i give. x(Z)x

[Majic]

o the 5 thing, lol. boobless thats wrong. somehow those are all scary though..... like they are all true.

[Danny]

Number 1 is the most Fundamental Law of the Universe...

30 is wrong, though. It's Lego...

[Teal]

Hm... maybe that's a way to avoid going back to bed after getting up to switch the alarm clock off... put the alarm clock in an old, empty biscuit tin and scatter lego all over the bedroom floor before you go to bed (or even better, drawing pins)...

Try sleeping after THAT.

10 is so true, though... But I dispute 7! (all my sharpeners are knackered, the only way to get it sharp is to use a scalpel)
14) - or a doll's head/deflated child's football.
17) Odd, I remember doing that... *hides* Especially in front of the rest of class... Thank Odd (I think) I've grown out of that. I think I'd die if I called Dr Upton "dad"...
28) there is an explanation for that. They're hiding, as they knew if they made their name known I would hunt them down and personally kill them. Damn coathangers...
*murderous looks*

[Roop]

#5 spells boobless