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  #1  
11-27-2004, 12:14 PM
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Rincewynd
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Rise to power: a Glukkon's tale

I have come up with a story. I put extra bits in chapter in no particular rota. You can rate each chapter if you like. Thinking of makking a film of this-already changed my mind. If you want to make a film of this you must pay me 1 Billion dollars (or just put my name under 'special thanks' in the credits )
Prologue:
Jarv was a Glukkon like any other, had a small business of his own, but that was where the similarity ended. Right at this moment in Jarv’s life things were going perfectly, no higher did he want to go, didn’t even care if anyone was higher than him in the financial market, he always knew that they would stop and he would rise slightly ahead. But all this was about to change in just 3 weeks.

Chapter 1:
“How is our stock shares doing Lar?” asked Jarv as he sat in his comfortable leather chair looking out upon Oddworld’s vast beauty.
“Like clockwork sir,” replied Lar smugly, “most of the others have halted”.
“Wonderful, hmmmm I am hungr-”Jarv was interrupted by the sound of his phone, Jarv just loved the old antique phones, polishes his phones everyday, well when I say Jarv polished then everyday, I mean Lar polishes his telephones everyday.
“Hello? Jarv industries incorporated: exports and imports all in one place,” He answered, on the speaker. “What can I do for you?”
“Ah Jarv,” the voice replied, “I have a surprise for you. Just look out of the window”. And so Jarv did as the voice insisted and spun around on his chair to the window, and as soon as he got his focus back his cigar hung on his bottom lip as Jarv’s mouth widened with shock. For there right in front of the window was a bulldozer.
“What is that?!” Jarv said still peering out.
“That is the bulldozer mark 3, and you have 2 hours to take your pathetic company and get out!”
“Why are you doing this to me?” Jarv plead (it wasn’t proper etiquette for a glukkon to plea but Jarv was no ordinary Glukkon)
“You threw me on the streets and now its my turn,” And just as the voice said it he knew who it was, his old right hand man, Chel, which Jarv threw out for being too power seeking. Just at that moment Lar came back from the cafeteria (leaving when Glukkons were on the phone was considered polite) with a tray full of scrumptious snacks.
“You still on the phone boss?” Lar said as he progressed to the desk. Jarv spun back round with a shocked expression on his face.
“Something has gone wrong”
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'We each play out the parts fate has written for us.Free-will is an illusion' Kain-Soul Reaver

"Pull me up, then," he hinted.
"I think that might be sort of difficult," grunted Twoflower. "I don't actually think I can do it, in fact."
"What are you holding on to, then?"
"You."
"I mean besides me."
"What do you mean, besides you?" said Twoflower.

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  #2  
11-27-2004, 12:20 PM
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Fuzzle Guy
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I think it's good, but I don't have a billion dollars
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  #3  
11-27-2004, 12:23 PM
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I did give you the option of putting my name in the special thanks credits
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'We each play out the parts fate has written for us.Free-will is an illusion' Kain-Soul Reaver

"Pull me up, then," he hinted.
"I think that might be sort of difficult," grunted Twoflower. "I don't actually think I can do it, in fact."
"What are you holding on to, then?"
"You."
"I mean besides me."
"What do you mean, besides you?" said Twoflower.

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  #4  
11-27-2004, 12:58 PM
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Not in the special thanx, no way!

You'd be in the opening title sequence of credits, you would be one of the first peopel to appear
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  #5  
11-27-2004, 01:27 PM
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Rincewynd
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I feel so special ( i should say that i am a 14 year old, stilll a kid, and this was just in my spare time. If I were to be honest I haven't actually written a story before. But now that you have complimented me I am thinking of more)
You'll probably able to read the next chapter sometime over the next week or two
Good luck with any other things
--Rincewynd--
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'We each play out the parts fate has written for us.Free-will is an illusion' Kain-Soul Reaver

"Pull me up, then," he hinted.
"I think that might be sort of difficult," grunted Twoflower. "I don't actually think I can do it, in fact."
"What are you holding on to, then?"
"You."
"I mean besides me."
"What do you mean, besides you?" said Twoflower.

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  #6  
11-28-2004, 11:28 AM
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Rincewynd
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This is my next chapter in my tale. So....Enjoy
Chapter 2:
“I can’t believe you are really going to take this from them!” Lar complained as he sat on a wooden stool in Jarv’s old office (where he kept all his documents over the past years he managed Jarv industries) “don’t you have any money in this place. Put away where things like this happened?” as he knew Jarv was like that.
“I have a bit, I put the rest in my stock shares,” Jarv sulked, looking at his portrait.
“How much?” Lar asked some interest (Jarv was always negative about moolah, when Jarv meant a bit Lar knew that it wasn’t a lot).
“450 moolah,” Jarv said, still sulking, as he checked his balance on the on-board bank (Jarv was old fashioned but he still prefers the technology)
“Well I think we can buy a small office in the Narkie’s home of meaty by-products,” Lar explained over the top of a newspaper, “c’mon sir, when we get higher than Chel, and then ‘deal’ with him”
“O.K I’ll do it!” Jarv exclaimed rising up from his creaky wooden chair. “But first” his belly groaned, “let’s get something to eat”.
“Well I like the sound of your resume,” the Narkie concluded as he peered over Jarv’s forms to Jarv on the other side of a long, highly polished wooden table sitting on a comfortable chair with Lar by his side shining his rifle. “Hmmm….Yes……Oh I see you had a business of your own, and it closed after ‘unforeseen circumstances’ ”. Then he put down the forms and took off his spectacles and said in a strangely pleased voice “you’re hired”. At that point Jarv’s face lit up with happiness (this was the first time he had been interviewed and hired, as this has never happened to him) which slowly turned to an evil grin as he remembered what he was doing in the first place.
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'We each play out the parts fate has written for us.Free-will is an illusion' Kain-Soul Reaver

"Pull me up, then," he hinted.
"I think that might be sort of difficult," grunted Twoflower. "I don't actually think I can do it, in fact."
"What are you holding on to, then?"
"You."
"I mean besides me."
"What do you mean, besides you?" said Twoflower.

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  #7  
11-30-2004, 12:03 PM
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Very nice
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  #8  
11-30-2004, 12:16 PM
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i like it
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*Working on all the dead links around here, stay tuned!*

Throw around some Mudokons in my game Flying Mudokons!

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  #9  
12-09-2004, 09:21 AM
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Rincewynd
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Ah the marvelnous that is the next chapter.....Enjoy
Chapter 3:
“Now you will be working at area 3B7F, the cafeteria is just down the hall there.” Narkie said guiding Jarv and Lar down the finely decorated hallway, passing office after office. “You should also know that we keep the stakes high, you must be quick and decisive, if we leave it 1 second off we are history!” Jarv looked at Lar with nervousness, as he never was quick and decisive.
“Ah this is your office which has your n-” Narkie quickly stuck a scribbled message saying “Jarvz offis” and continued “name; we will get a better one of those later. Enjoy your new room, and remember….Urmmmm, errr work hard eat nice things!” Narkie quickly tripped out as he left the room in a hurry.
“Wow, what a view!” Jarv expressed as he admired the small rivers and green (green-ish) grass. Of course he did not see the damp walls and broken, everything.
“Ok now you know what to do?” Lar mentioned as he looked in the files cupboard for what had been happening and what needed doing.
“Urmmmm yes, but remind me” Jarv nervously answered. Lar gave off a sigh and continued
“We must get promoted!” Lar ordered as he banged his fists n the desk, of course not to loudly otherwise people might listen. “Don’t you want to get back at Chel?” Jarv had just come to the crossroad in his life; one way was hard work leading to success, leading to getting back at Chel. On the other side there was relaxing, doing nothing, which would get him sacked. But the other was a dead end (that would be a T-junction, but a ‘T-junction of life’ wouldn’t work).

Well to be honest it is quite obvious what path he would take.
__________________
'We each play out the parts fate has written for us.Free-will is an illusion' Kain-Soul Reaver

"Pull me up, then," he hinted.
"I think that might be sort of difficult," grunted Twoflower. "I don't actually think I can do it, in fact."
"What are you holding on to, then?"
"You."
"I mean besides me."
"What do you mean, besides you?" said Twoflower.

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  #10  
12-09-2004, 09:36 AM
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Just what we like
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  #11  
12-12-2004, 01:58 PM
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Good stuff Rincewynd. I especially like all the dialogue

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