87 names that would probably not be the best titles for soda brands

[Dequibenzo]

Just to prove to you how bored I really am (because I just know that some of you doubt my word on it. Don't think I'm not on to you), here are 87 names I personally think should not be picked as titles for new carbonated beverages. Try to imagine each curved across a shiny aluminum can surface, try to imagine being the least bit thirsty, and you'll see what I mean.

1- Burrs n' Nettles
2- Fiesta del fuego!
3- Mm Mm cancer
4- Mellow Tallow
5- Mountain Goat
6- Statutory Grape
7- Woo Ha, I've been shot
8- Baby Jessica
9- Dude's hair
10- Hayfever Hank
11- You better damn well like peaches, punk
12- Spaniel punch
13- I'm wearing mittens
14- Tell my wife I love her
15- Why not just drink water?
16- Simply bile
17- Why god why!?
18- Yeeeee
19- Roger Corman
20- Cajun Crunchberries
21- Bricks!
22- Elaphantine mist
23- Bat-shit crazy
24- Ow
25- Kirk or Picard?
26- Warm n' sticky
27- Neon Freon
28- Diet Smegma
29- Caffeine free Diet Smegma
30- R. L. (Royal leprocy)
31- Sour cream and wasps
32- Six-down
33- Makes-u-lonely
34- Why won't anybody love me? I can change, I swear!
35- Lemming-lime
36- Pre-nup
37- Post-op
38- Autopsy Juice
39- What's with the cloves?
40- Gym teacher
41- Tasty burnt
42- Squeal
43- Misapropriation
44- Debilitating
45- Cracked heads of the filthy Irish
46- Conform!
47- My Dad
48- Churrizo chunks
49- Leased grease
50- ?
51- Caffeine free Diet Smegma Lite
52- Rocks... I think
53- Minimal amount of spiders
54- Cheese etc
55- Assisted breathing
56- Olaf
57- Corn husks
58- Blinky
59- Los Angeles Dew
60- Elvis sweat
61- # 61
62- No-more-teeth
63- Mostly hair
64- Just guess
65- Stubble gum
66- Damn I want a tamale
67- Danny's socks
68- Dino-nuggets
69- Captain Juju's Monkey water
70- Foot beer
71- Max Amped Stoked Energy logs
72- Where's the peaches?
73- Frailty, thy name is woman
74- Bean runnoff
75- Oily discharge
76- Blended Bleh
77- Escort leftovers
78- Lego use # 651
79- Liquid Burlap
80- Dusty
81- Uteral sluff
82- Shirts verses skins
83- Tumble weed
84- Shasta
85- Sugar Free, Caffeine free, Diet Smegma lite
86- Cheesy effects
87- Smegma Classic

See, what did I tell you? Really, REALLY bored. Somebody do something, or tommorrow it's going to be 124 home loan bank slogans that wouldn't be good ideas.

[One, Two, Middlesboogie]

I'd drink 11, 18, 50, and 61.

[PinkHaired Mudokon CWR]

I will drink 3!
It's cancer in a can!!!! LOL

Also I would drink the DUde one so I can have sexy hair.

[oddling]

I'd like you better damn well like peaches, punk and who ha I've been shot. Don't ask nme why I just would. And can I make up my own bad soda name? How about Paramite juice would that work?Or Slurg slime thats good. Or Vomit-ade ew that ones gross.

Oddling l:c l

[salty pretzils]

No. 78 looks nice.....
*dies laughing*
I've got one:

Slig water:use it, don't abuse it!

[Melvin:squeeking paramite]

I'd drink 11 and 61... Maybe...

I would probably try 19, and maybe like it... or not... Most likely not. Dull and flat, probably...

[Joe the Intern]

Hehe! I liked those. I'd probably drink number 30 and number 69.

[SeaRex]

I think you may have something with this Smegma brand cola, Deq! And I also liked 6, 11, and 34.

[Danny]

Anyone who is bored enough to write all this has my sympathy...

Fortunately, I'm not bored enough to read it all...

[Maybe Later ]

#6 did catch my eye though, as I remember my friend Helen bringing to a party one time a bottle of wine called "The Unpronounceable Grape"...

[Dequibenzo]

Oh, you haven't seen anything yet. Just wait until I'm REALLY bored.

And anybody who would drink something called Smegma Cola needs to consult a dictionary.

[SeaRex]

Originally posted by Dequibenzo
And anybody who would drink something called Smegma Cola needs to consult a dictionary.

I was joking...