...Bicycle. And the latest incarnation of Tony Hawk. And a skateboard. And an Action Man. And... etc


If I could, I would destroy the world with...

...things that dwell in my nose.

My toenails...

... used to grow out of my ears, thats why...

...the sun orbits the Earth.

MY PANCAKE IS BURNT! I'll tell you what I'm going to do; I'm going to...

...stop caring and eat the pancake.

I'm wondering why...

...the walls are closing in on me. Help!

Right! That's it! I'm going to...

...go to the- Oh, never mind. Forget it. I'm too goddamned lazy to do that.

Haha! I had such a great time yesterday when I got up on the table and...

...quickly got off again. Which is exactly why the bartender had to...

...had to spank me vigorously in front of about 20 fat, ugly, old women that used to be apes. So I went home and...

...ate five boxes of chocolate covered cheese.

If I could meet any one on the forums, it would have to be...

...Anna so I can play on her Middlesboogie-o-matic.

When I put a live trout on my head, a small periwinkle pops out of my...

...navel.

If I built an amusement park ride of my own, it would be called _____ and it would...

...Nemesis and it would look exactly like the original Nemesis but it would be one little vertical loop and it would be specifically designed to make people throw-up.

I love...

...it when someone chews on my feet. Fun, no?

Er, why did that guy just...

...eat a hamster?

Don't you just love it when...

...I do my jig for you?

If I woke up to find myself alone in the world, I would have...

...to go online straight away te read comics and browse forums.

Stop ___, will you!!!

Jabbing me in the eye

Why don't you go and...

...become ruler of the world.

That's it! I'm going to commit suicide by jumping off a...

...piece of paper! And after that i'm gonna slap my dog with...

A pair of red-hot salad servers, which I previously used to clean out...

...my easy bake oven, after the incident with the...

.....mutant toilet plunger

Hey do you know where I can.........

Oddling l:c l

...find some of that new spray-on hair?

*sighs* My parents commited suicide together, my dog was mistook for a cow and ground into hamburger meat, an earwig is drilling into my brain, my house burned down, and I have a paper cut. I suppose I'll go...

...and drown my sorrows in...

... a glass of milk.


My computer starts...

...to freeze/crash when I open too many programs at once, especially ones like...

Netscape, which is a good thing because...

...it can display blinking text!

I worry about my...

....self because I will die because of.....