I'd take jessa and... nggggh

Leave me at the border, thanks.

Kentucky: Come for the chicken, stay for the hospitality. Leave for the religion.

I saw X-Men: First Class it was a decent, fun movie. I liked some characters more than others, but it's a superhero team movie, you're supposed to play favourites.

And Constantine again. I like that film more than I should.

Transformers 3; pretty good I enjoyed most of it but I thought Shockwave *spoilers* was supposed to be the main villain!*spoilers* I feel cheated, thinking about buying the toy even though nothing will ever replace the G1 Shockwave to me ;)

Anyway besides the lack of Shockwave I just felt the whole movie lacked heart just like the other two some of the things Optimus Prime said really bothered me. Buit I thought overall it had the best aesthetics of the "trilogy" by far! I though Mirage, Shockwave, and Sentinel looked really slick. I also felt like this film was closest to G1 of the three, it paid homage to one of my fav G1 episodes (Transport to Oblivion) and it was fun to see that.

But yeah I'm hoping for a reboot now...

Nah, it was more Megatron's Master Plan, the Ultimate Doom, and a bit from Atlantis, Arise! mixed together with the new thing with Sentinel.

I saw Transformer 3.
Here we go.
It was marginally better than the second, but still an absolutely terrible movie. Funnish to watch, but still just a great stanking, stooping turd laid all over anyone who expected better. The girl who replaced Meghan Fox wasn't a terrible actress, an improvement even, but her and Shia Labouef's character's were just so pointless. They were only around as support for the other.

Obviously there were about 500 Million plotholes, but I'm going to avoid criticizing those for now. The first 20-30 minutes are essentially Micheal Bay simultaneously smearing cum on and shitting over the American flag. 'Blah blah blah conspiracy moon robots'. I was waiting for Shockwave to do something cool, but all that happens is he lumbers around, says 'Optimus Prime', eats a building and then gets punched in half.

Every decepticon dies. Megatron gets his head ripped off, Starscream is blinded and then gets some kind of lobotomy, various goons get blown up, etc... It leaves no room for a previous villain. Which means the next movie will either be Unicron or hopefully never gets made.

Speaking of Unicron, guess who isn't present at all? That first teaser trailer shows an old Transformer sitting in space who looks quite similar to Unicron. Nope. Instead it's just Jetfire from the first movie, except now he's a bad guy. Nice writing, Kruger. I feel mislead over this, but at the same time thankful Micheal Bay didn't get his grubby mitts all over one of my favorite Transformers.

Micheal Bay has had 3 opportunities to make these movies, he made one half decent one and then released two of the most god awful, bloated wastes of time and money in the world. You don't need to see TF3. You don't even need to think about it. Want a similar experience to watching all three movies? Get a deodorant stick. Smell it. There's Transformers. Now eat the deodorant, puke it up, and smell that. There's Revenge of the Fallen. Now rereconsume your vomit, digest it, mix the resulting pee and poo together and dump it all over your head and don't wash it off for 150 minutes. There's Dark of The Moon. You're fuckin' welcome.

I lol'd hardcore at the last paragraph, Mac. I would say you should go into the review-writing business, if it wasn't already so fucking saturated by countless blogs and that wank-stain Nostalgia Critic.

I recently watched Martin Rosen's The Plague Dogs. Brilliant film, though I found out afterwards I watched an abridged version that is 20ish minutes shorter than the original. I can't imagine I missed anything too vital though, since 90% of the film as it is was the two dogs aimlessly wandering the countryside. I recommend it, and it's more famous counterpart Watership Down, to anyone who wants to see an animated movie with talking animals that doesn't suck.

BUT BUT BUT ZOOKEEPER LOOKS SO GOOD!

I saw Hobo With a Shotgun. Do you know what that is? It's the most Canadian film ever made. It's a fucking masterpiece. Here, have a trailer.



I'm fond of the Robots that allegedly killed Jesus.

watched the plague dogs a few years ago. i really enjoyed it, bu it was so sad D= ... To think that cartoons can fill me with such serious emotion.


I also wathed Transformers a few days ago... Strangely, I didnt hate it. But I also went in, fully knowing it would be quite terrible and just an FX orgie.

Hobo looks pretty fuckin' tits. AND ITS ON NETFLIX. AND OH SNAP RUTGER HAUER.
The visuals remind me of Condemned, only more colorful.

Also, The Zookeeper. Fuck my anus. I had pretty much no respect for Kevin James as it was, but now he's below absolute zero. That's right, below absolute zero. I bet Lord Kelvin never predicted that something so low that it defies quantum physics would be a porcine C-list actor.

His birth name was "Knipfing". Thats a way funnier name than "James". So much for his comedic genius.

Yeah. :(
I felt so bad for Snitter. He was so hopeful that everything would be okay.

I saw transformers. The only memory of the cartoon I have is of Witwicky's consciousness being implanted into a transformer and hi going mad because of it. So I'm clearly not plugged into the same source of rage as old fans.

As it is, I remember an hour long robot battle scene, which I enjoyed, and a desperate, painful urge to pee, which I did not.

The last hour was the only good part. Everything else, well you know. Deoderant poop and all.

Me and Jordan also watched this dumb little number right here:

This movie just baffled me. 90 minutes, released in 1997, lots of cheesiness. You know.
And then the dog gets hit by a car.
And then it comes back as a comet.
And then there's an Italian.
And then there's like FIVE DINNER SCENES IN THE SAME RESTAURANT. More, even.
And then it fuckin' ends.

Now, how it ends bothered me. The main boy's dog Lucky, well he's dead as hell. He comes back as a ghost dog, hijinks ensue, and then he goes back to dog heaven (as another dumb fucking Particle Illusions comet), decreeing "Never forgut me, Tobes, I'll be watching you even when you can't see me."

And then the kid gets ANOTHER dog. Luckier. It's just...it doesn;t help the grieving process for my beloved Milo.

Oh, and the dog can talk because he's a ghost, and it's just the dumbest voice ever. I mean that. It's an audible lack of intelligence.

Why did you think Sentinel Prime was Unicron?

Why did you even think Unicron would be in this one?

I gave a shit about the production of ROTF, it ended up being everything wrong with film. I figured if I ignored production for Dark, it wouldn't be half bad. I was, of course completely wrong. Garbage in garbage out.

When I saw the first teaser trailer, I was like 'ehh, looks like Unicron, might not be a moon, but he's on the moon. Good enough.' I figured Bay/Kruger would be clearheaded enough not to just reuse the entire character concept of Jetfire all over and try to make you think it was a villain, again I was wrong. Leonard Nimoy should go back to bed and someone should just make a fucking movie where a planet gets eaten already so I don't have to watch these things or answer insipid questions.

So you mistook a normal sized this guy:
http://i51.tinypic.com/2rfu06h.jpg

For this guy:
http://i53.tinypic.com/9j146d.jpg

Not to mention you actually thought they'd use the hokey-est part of the old cartoon show in the film. Wow, man.

I heard/read a rumour that Unicron was involved in the plot somehow when TF3 was in pre production (when Skids and Mudflap were still in the plot). I'm not sure why you're trying to be clever about this when I've made it pretty clear it was both an honest mistake and a pretty harmless one, but then again you actually still like this drek so I guess you're being defensive. No need, kiddo. I didn't like the movie, nothing you can do about it, but then again you're the one who wants to nitpick after I brought up how a family comedy made me distressed about my dead dog. Thanks for that, by the way.

I saw Bad Teacher and Horrible Bosses.

Bad Teacher was pretty damn funny. It relied heavily upon awkward humor, but fuck it, I love awkward humor. Pretty raunchy too.

Horrible Bosses. I really wanted to like it a lot, even though going into it I hadn't enjoyed the trailers that much. It had people I like in it, so maybe I had too high of expectations. Either way, it had its funny moments, but it was slow as hell. It was less than two hours, but felt much longer. I think there was maybe one laugh out loud moment, and the rest were mere chuckles. Also, if you see it dont stay for the blooper real, one of my friends made us and FUCK DAMNIT, there was one moment that made me rage so hard.

Jennifer Aniston was hot though.

Didn't even read it, jumped straight to reply.

Watched Cyrus last night. I dislike Jonah Hill, but I really like John C. Riley and Marisa Tomei, so things sort of balanced out. Based on the plot description, we were expecting a comedy, but it was more of an awkward/drama/wtf kind of movie. Still, Riley is flexing his acting muscles, which is good, because I fell in love with the ogre way back when Magnolia came out. Jonah Hill is more detestable than he ever has been before. He was cast...Perfectly.

We also watched Cedar Rapids, and that was...Pretty okay. Ed Helms makes me laugh with his moon faced/wide-eyed wonder delivery of everything, John C. Riley was an asshole, and Wendell Pierce [from HBO's The Wire] was pretty funny, plus the fact that he kept plugging The Wire made it even better.

Just saw the last Harry Potter. It was pretty good.

My favourite scenes were in the pensieve with Snape's memories. They were handled really well and really hit the right emotional notes.

I thought that the battle wasn't quite as big as it could have been; quite often you see Harry running through empty (though damaged) hallways, or surrounded by running people but there's not that much actual fighting. Also, I didn't see why they needed to alter the confrontation between Harry and Voldemort at the end; it was written so dramatically in the book. And it would have been so much better if Harry had defeated Voldemort in front of everyone else.

And, worse of all, they severely diminished Neville's Crowning Moment of Awesome.


But, all in all, a good film. Oh, and if you get the opportunity, see it in 3d. I saw it in 2d and I regret it; I reckon it would be one of the few films that the 3d actually makes it better.

I'm waiting to see Cowboys Vs. Aliens. For some odd reason i think it looks good.

I hope they make Robots vs. Zombies.

I'm surprised they haven't made a Pirates vs. Ninjas film yet.
They'll probably shoehorn ninjas into the next POTC film though.

They kinda did in Pirates 3, right? Or were they just generally Asian or Chinese or whatever?

Could this be the real Dark Knight Rises trailer?



Some say it is, some say it isn't and that the real one is released within 48 hours or something like that. Oh, and some say there was an official teaser shown on some website, but it was deleted really quickly. This is exciting!

Since it's made from clips of other movies, it's not.

They were Singaporean pirates. They sailed Junk ships, so they were Chinese. Also the fireworks and the Chinese-sounding names. No ninjas though.

That's obviously the fake trailer. The real leaked one was removed from Youtube within a few hours of it's release, it contained some shots of the new Bane.

Just saw the first of the new Torchwood. Looking good. The prospect of no one dying any more is quite horrifying. As I've long maintained, though I've never considered the very short term implications of it on a global scale.

I think the end of episode preview must rank up there in longest seasonal previews on television.