Not going to lie. I was actually meant to post this in Bits and Pieces but clicked on the wrong thread.

Burn After Reading was on TV tonight, just watched it.

I really liked it, especially Brad Pitt's character. "CIA shit, numbers and dates and shit!"

I'm also planning on watching Rum Diary today. Anyone seen it?

This isn't pertinent in any way, but I hate it when people say "I was meant". It implies that forces external to yourself intended you to do something, as opposed to "I meant" which implies that you yourself intended to do something.

Also, the "was" isn't necessary because "meant" is already the past tense of mean, and any additional words implying past tense are just superfluous, and redundant.

Frankly I could care less.

That's because you say it, right?

I recall an argument about the phrase. I'd like to think "I couldn't care less" won.

I fully support you on your former grammatical correction.

That's because you say it, right?

Now I'm just confused. Curse you and your devious wordplay.

watched The Brothers Grimm or whatever the fuck it's called. okay. not really my type of film, though.

That one was sort of the black sheep of Gilliam's filmography. Even his fans kind of hated it.

i dunno what it was. i really wanted to enjoy it, but it just didn't hold my attention, so watching it to the end felt like a chore. i feel like they could have done it better but unsure on how.

I think if it was a travelling sort of movie, wherein the brothers came upon the real-life versions of what inspired their stories, it would have been perfect. All of the references to classic Grimm's fairy tales in the movie were so shoe-horned and had little to nothing to do with the central plot (what little there was, anyway).

That movie was balls.

It was a BLAM movie. I still don't understand what the hell the gingerbread man was about.

The gingerbread mud man and the scene with Hansel and Gretel (contracted to "Hans" and "Greta" for some reason) were completely thrown in for the sake of making it more of a "fairy tale" movie. From what I understand, the movie's entire production was a mess. Gilliam was at constant odds with the executives over final cut privilege, and as a result, almost all of the post production material was rushed.

I'm not sure any amount of post could have made it good.

At the very least the visual fx would have looked better.

The Simpsons: Treehouse of Horror V. The one with the Shining parody.

Absolutely brilliant, every single time. One of the darkest, bloodiest episodes of any show to air during prime time.

Fantastic. I mean, who doesn't love "The Fog that turns you inside out"?

I forgot to watch Rum Diary, but I watched the third episode of Skins. Eh, it's still pretty bad, but I like to watch it.

i fucking love that episode. 'The Shinning'.

Chronicle.

It was pretty good.

Bye.

The trailers made it look like some kind of Akira rip-off. Is it?

I watched Redline, it was the most mediocre film I've seen in months. There was absolutely nothing to it except good animation that lacked a single grain of verisimilitude and big explosions.

This is pretty much the only thing I've heard about the film from everyone who has seen it.

EDIT: Should be Bits & Pieces

I've never seen Akira, so I can't make a comparison.

Suffice to say, they get powers, play pranks, angsty guy in the group throws a tantrum and decides to delete everything.

If Akira is like that, then yes. Twas a rip-off.

Passed what I explained, the film was put together quite well.

In Akira, only the runt of the group gets the powers. Being the angsty little cunt he is, he goes kind of power mad and uses his telekinesis to destroy the city because he feels like it.

I doubt Chronicle ends with Andrew turning into a giant mutated demigod though.

i'd like to see Monstrous Discrepancies.

>:(

No, he gets killed by a statue because he forgot to THRAW UP AH BARRYER

I seen 'Legendary' over the weekend.

Bad film. Very bad film. But I liked it regardless. It was just full of that cheese and shit that I just lap up in films. One of my favorite parts was when they thought they could make high school wrestling looking as manly as possible by throwing John Cena into it.

Another one of my favorite parts was this whenever your young fella loses and Cena dramatically falls to his knees in anguish. All in all a shit film and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. Unless you like poo films, then you'll love it.

Also, Harsh Times. It was a less gay version of Brokeback Mountain with more guns, drugs and urban surroundings. This one I did legitimately enjoy. It was a good film.

As far as I've heard there's no cyborg baby monster.

I'm pretty sure they won't include that in the remake either (if it ever gets made), since they're gunning for a PG-13 rating. You know, so they can artfully negate any impact the original's accurate portrayals of street violence and visceral horror ever had.

Speaking of watered down garbage, I'm watching the new The Thing movie as we speak. So far, I've been blown away by how unimpressive it is. More to come when it's over, but I'm not holding out high hopes for this one.

Ugh.

I had watched scary movies before but none did it; more jumpy than anything. Then, my dad sat me down and simply said, 'watch this'. The film was 'The Thing', I was about 15, and it did scare the fuck out of me.

But, I still did enjoy it. It was the fright-factor. My dad introduced me to a series of backseat horrors that I found both scary and enjoyable.

My dad knows his horrors. I would also like to add he despises any horror film released in the past 10 years. He is quite simply, a very bad man.

The original movie was amazing. This piece of shit played the horror tropes so straight, I was surprised there wasn't a scene where someone closes the medicine cabinet and sees the Thing standing behind them in the mirror.

It felt very much like Evil Dead 2, or even the Ghostbusters video game, in that the first half was just a remake of the original. It didn't try to go in it's own direction until 2/3rds of the cast was already dead.

The CG was awful, and left me yearning for the nausea-inducing visuals in the original. Speaking of that, there was almost no gore or swearing in this movie at all. It's like the filmmakers were going for a PG rating, but had one controversial image too many, and ended up with a movie that felt PG-13 but could only be marketed to half that audience.

There were also so many missed opportunities in this movie that my balls could not be bluer:

- Making the protagonist a female could have worked if she wasn't duller than a cardboard spoon and they had cast just a little bit older.

- If they did a bait and switch where the protagonist turned out to be the Thing, that would have been a pretty great twist and would have made the film an iota better.

- They should have left out the monster sounds when she burns the last guy at the end, and made it ambiguous as to whether or not he was the Thing. That would have been more congruous with the original, which had a greater focus on paranoia, isolationism, and mistrust.

If you're going to watch this movie, save your time and just re-watch the original. It's the same movie, only better.

And no, I didn't bother putting spoiler tags. This movie is too retarded for me to care.

Chris, why the FUCK are you not a film critic?

Because the internet is already saturated with self righteous critics and their opinionated review blogs. Typically "critics" are snotty cunts who only do it because they're not actually good at anything.

I don't think I'd post these little reviews anywhere but here, but thanks for the vote of confidence :p

Oh c'mon, the new The Thing wasn't that bad. And why was the CG so bad, the thing itself looked pretty creepy imo.

Yes, yes it was.

I'm pretty sure it was exactly as bad as I said it was. But you're entitled to your opinion. EVEN IF IT'S COMPLETELY WRONG!!!!!