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When's the wedding?

Posted 04-03-2011 at 08:39 AM by Mac Sirloin

Ugh. Remember Jordan? He's the one who helped me 'kill myself' for like ten minutes last Summer. Brain on a boat aneurysm or something.

Anyhoo, on Friday night he called me at about 6:00PM to make plans. I already had plans with other friends made days prior. I lied to him, saying I was going to be driving with my dad because Jordan has no other friends than me and gets all jealous and huffy if I tell him I already have plans with other people. No one more important to Jordan than himself. I tell him I'll text him later (while under the impression that I'd get to the bar around 9:30, but ended up being 11:00).

So I'm out and about with my other friends, enjoying the truck that Aaron just bought (and dodging a 440$ fine for various problems with said truck) and kind of dicking around before we went to the bar. Simple plans for a simple night. Out of nowhere, I get a text from Jordan. Then another. And another. I reply with "Still with my dad." hoping to shut him the fuck up, but nope. Turns out he called my house before he texted me and my mom told him outright I'd just left with Aaron.

Now, I'm fine with someone calling me out on lying. Lying is something I would rather not do as much as I have. On the other hand, I don't like being ceaselessly lectured about how wrong I was to lie by someone who claims to be my best friend, and is a frequent
(and more serious) liar than me. Flaking out on someone is certainly a dick move, but the second I saw that he was spamming me (long) texts, I knew that he was just throwing a gigantic baby temper tantrum. I hate it when people start shit with me via text or like, an MSN conversation. That is pathologically hypocritical, but this goes a step further with Jordan. I assume he's not so bananas that he'll think I'm going to listen his whiny-ass bark out gems like "I am 100% completely in the right." and just accept it. Fuck that.

So my entire policy for this has been ignore everything else that he has to say that is on a screen and make him say a word of this face to face, but he won't because he's a stinking butthole and I am an iron butted warrior.

I actually spent a saturday night watching a movie I WANTED to see with more than one other person. That was damn unique. (Godzilla vs. Mechagodzilla feat. Titanosaurus. Titanosaurus went down like a bitch.) I also ate pizza and talked about how I'd cook my tarantula if I had to eat it. Aaron would eat it raw (if he could take the hairs off of it) I would roast it and eat her with Guacamole, and Roger wouldn't eat it at all.

I post this on here simply because I've told everyone else and it's really exasperating dealing with someone like Jordan. He's like me; he can type real good, but he's pretty much just a giant child. Worse than me, though.

Comments 12

Total Comments 12

Comments

	It sounds like you and your friend are growing apart. He seems to sense it. It happens.
	Posted 04-03-2011 at 08:53 AM by Disgruntled Intern

That's the worst part. I'd be happy to hang out with Jordan just as much as I used to, but I got jobs. Hell, my chief employer will stick me in a 12-hour shift in the morning on monday then the exact opposite on Tuesday night. It's not a comfortable sleep schedule, and since Jordan and I always stay up until like 6:00AM (and that's early) I always go to work unrested. We're growing apart, but we could both make an effort to stop it from happening.

Posted 04-03-2011 at 08:59 AM by Mac Sirloin

My group of friends had someone like what you describe Jordan as in it for a while. Egotistical son of a bitch, who was always right, and would be angry if he wasn't the first person you wanted to hang out with. We got tired of his shit whenever he thought one of us was purposely avoiding him because he didn't sit with him at lunch. So we disowned him. I'm not saying you do that to Jordan, you guys could maybe work it out. We probably would have accepted him back in if he admitted to being an ass and tried changing his ways, but he threw a tantrum, as always.

Posted 04-03-2011 at 09:17 AM by Daxter King

Updated 04-03-2011 at 09:20 AM by Daxter King

Trying to make a friendship work is like bailing water out of a sinking boat with a bucket. It's going to work for a while, but eventually someones arms are going to get tired, and down it goes. Also, if he's such a dick that he can't respect the fact that you have a job and need to keep that job by being well rested, then it probably is time to move on. It's a bummer that you're his only friend, but it sounds like there are several pretty good reasons for that.

Posted 04-03-2011 at 09:54 AM by Disgruntled Intern

i know exactly where you're coming from. it's weird, because i was just thinking a week or so ago about a situation like this that i was in a couple of years ago, so i'm now convinced i'm in The Truman Show.

anyway, i used to be best mates with someone i'd known since primary school, and we were never seen apart. we used to do all sorts of shit, most of it stupid, but we were just kids so got away with it most of the time. when we left school we both found jobs, i got myself into farming and had very unsociable hours.

my mate got himself into horticulture, and worked basic 9-5 hours. he wanted to do stuff, drink, whatever. i just wanted to wank and sleep. then when i did visit him on my occasional weekend off, i got the impression he resented me coming around. he wanted to fuck around, so did i, but he also wanted to show me how much he didn't give a fuck anymore, because he had 'better' mates now that he could do shit with. basically he acted like a big wet fanny whenever i tried to get something going.

anyway because of that i haven't seen him for about two years now, and he only lives across the road from me. it's a shame, because there were lots of things we did and experienced, both in and out of school, that not many other people would be able to relate to. being attacked by a dog while a car tries to run you over, being assaulted by a woman wielding a banana, being chased by various people we had somehow pissed off. fucking surreal.

it was immature and stupid, we were immature and stupid, but we would reminisce and laugh about it while watching golf and drinking cheap beer. it's like part of your history has been erased because there's no one for you to chat to about it, and most of the time they won't believe what you tell them or won't 'get it' anyway. it's a fucking shame.

so that was a ridiculously long post to say i know what you mean. like i always seem to say, you know your situation better than anyone, but i'd be inclined to say try and remain friends. it's shit trying to relate with people who have no idea what you're talking about. then again, like DI said, friendship shouldn't be a chore.

RAMBLE RAMBLE RAMBLE

Posted 04-03-2011 at 10:25 AM by MA

Updated 04-03-2011 at 10:27 AM by MA

	I have nothing but contempt for my friends from high school.
	Posted 04-03-2011 at 11:33 AM by Wings of Fire

My friends are epic once they knew what i was like they all accepted that and was prepared for any shit that i would start with my mates and once they did that it was so easy hanging out with them it's like we're a big group of people that all understand eachother

so what im trying to get at is maybe we should just accept our friends and prepare for any shit thats going to happen and if you cant handleit tell them

Posted 04-04-2011 at 01:44 PM by CrissCross

	That's a cool story bro.
	Posted 04-04-2011 at 01:54 PM by Daxter King

	Definition of cool story bro, right there.
	Posted 04-04-2011 at 01:55 PM by Mr. Bungle

	Damn cool, damn cool story.
	Posted 04-04-2011 at 03:39 PM by enchilado

	I've made some attempts to patch things up, interspersed with verbal skirmishes. I'm so tired. I shouldn't even have to feel like I should lie, but if I don't he'll just bitch and moan and then say he didn't. This is so stupid.
	Posted 04-06-2011 at 08:47 PM by Mac Sirloin

	Stupid? Of course. That's what socialising as a human is all about.
	Posted 04-06-2011 at 09:54 PM by enchilado

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