I had a Master Plan, which involved earning money from now until Christmas and buying myself a new laptop around that time, since my old one was getting a bit... gimpy.

However, all of these plans were scuppered last night when my old laptop attempted mitosis and found that it only really works for single-celled organisms. Less basically, the plastic case at the bottom broke and a little metal bar that fixed the left hinge connecting the screen and the keyboard side lost its anchorage,...