CHAPTER 3 - The Truth Hurts (why are these titles so GAY!)
Abe and Arn were standing about, talking about Abe's mortality rate.
"So, how is it that you are still alive even though you saved less that 50 Mudokons?" Arn asked in unashamed awe. Abe grunted a cool grunt whilst standing with his arms folded.
"I've tried explaining it to you squares before, but I'll try one more time before my gal gets here," Abe said, like a cool person.....
Once upon a time there was a spindly, fragile Mud named Abe. Abe was the butt of all jokes, the target of all bullies and the victim of many a cupcake.
In his bedroom, in front of his Billy Idol poster, he got on his knees and prayed to Allah. He beseech-ed this fine guy the power of immortality but Allah was all like, 'Uh-uh, bitch can't have none of that shit." Instead Allah invested in Abe, the Sands of Time.
However, not all things were all dandy, with this new found power Abe had the stability structure of a cream cracker. Every time the bullies beat him... he died, every time a fart was thrown in his face... he died.
But... whenever Abe dies, the sands of time react, and this reaction inside of Abe turns him into a flock of flying thingers, puts him to a safe place where he could replay the time before he died to avoid death.
"So as you can see... that wally, Molluck, had no chance of me dying, I just reversed time and blew that sex-pad to the sky without getting caught." Abe said smugly thinking of a pair of leather trousers, "Now if you excuse me..."
Abe took a running jump into a meat grinder and died.
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I just thought that I had to explain the whole bird thing properly.
EDIT: Abe's gal is very upset about Abe being dead and whatnot... thought you all should know.
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"I'm staunchly atheist, I simply don’t believe in God. But I'm still Catholic, of course. Catholicism has a much broader reach than just the religion. I'm technically Catholic, it's the box you have to tick on the census form: 'Don't believe in God, but I do still hate Rangers..'"
Last edited by Ridg3; 07-22-2010 at 12:58 PM..
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