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  #1  
03-01-2005, 04:11 PM
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sliguy101
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Shattered Renisance

Hi guys. This is a non-oddworld story called Shattered Renisance. I hope you enjoy it.

1-Strange land

Why am I here? This is a strange place to be. I see ghost ships and banshies. Dead trees stand everywhere I see. What is this place's purpose? Is it a sign, or perhaps a lost land? I hear the gusting winds coming from above the snowy mountains. The ground below be is gray color, like stone. The sky is purple. I walk across the stone ground. When I stop, I see an altar. I walk up to it and see a crystal ball. I rub it to see what it holds. I was shocked to see dead souls begging to come out. I quickly run away from the alter. I walked on and saw a statue. It was a strange, evil-type clown. It seemed to have a silver hat on. On that silver hat was some red and white stripped things sticking out of it. It had big, long ears that were pointy. On the ends of the ears were ring-like ear piercings. The face looked pure evil. It had an evil grin on it. He seemed to have on a dark type of ballroom mask on his eyes. he had red makeup coming down his eyes. The silver hat seemed to be covering up his nose. On his chin seemed to be a pointy, silver beard. It was stange. On his neck he had a big, puffed-out collar just like a real clown had. He had a shirt that only showed the center. It had some detailed cross. He had a yellow jacket with some puffed out sleeves just like on his neck. The odd thing was the statue only went up to his waist. I moved on even more. Soon I hope to discover more about this land. It is so strange. Will I be here forever? Will I find a way out? How could I escape?
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  #2  
03-01-2005, 04:57 PM
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Yay! Bravo! very good beginning! I cant wait to see the rest.
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  #3  
03-01-2005, 06:15 PM
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Oohh, creepy! Very nice intro, Sliguy! I've been looking forward to reading another one of your stories for a while!
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  #4  
03-02-2005, 12:52 PM
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2-Lady

I still walk across the deserted land. I see a lady playing violin while having a blindfold on. She seemed to be standing on a rock. She had only an old, rugged dress. I walked up to her and asked, "Hey! Do you know where I am?" She had no reply. She just kept playing. "Hello?" I asked. Then she just looked at me. Finally, she stopped playing. She walked up to me. She felt my face. "Are you one of them?" She asked. "One of who?" I asked. "A Franshile." Said the lady. "No." I replied. "Good. I'm sending out warnings. I think the master is on his way." Said the lady. "Master? What master?" I asked. "If you've seen the statue, that is the master of Franshiles." Replied the lady. "You see, I'm a new to this place." I said. "Then you must get out!" Replied the lady. "Why?" I asked. "This is a horrible place to be. Any person that lives here is miserable!" Replied the lady. "Hold on, why do you have that blindfold on?" I asked. "My eyes were removed because I tried to escape this place. My stitches are still in place, and I don't want people to see them." She replied. There was a short silence. "Run along. I must give out the warning." She said. She walked up on her stone and started playing again. That lady was so odd. Why wouldn't the franshiles let her escape? Are the fanshiles the rulers of this place? My questions were ready to be answered once I went along.
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  #5  
03-02-2005, 02:50 PM
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This is an interesting story, Sliguy. Keep it up because it's great!
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  #6  
03-02-2005, 03:05 PM
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Yeah! nice chapter, keep it up!
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I'm the guy who annoyed the other old pricks back in '03. ~Abe16~

“You shouldn't just be a band, ... If you've got the time and you've got the space you've got to make something of it. We might balls the whole thing up but you've got to try!”~Josh Homme, Queens of the Stone Age

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