The tale of a Mud named Abe

Ridg3 · #1 07-19-2010, 12:44 PM

Okay, I've been meaning to do this for a while but haven't really had the time to do it... now, however, I'm able to do it.

Enjoy and please. criticism welcome.

CHAPTER 1 - A heroes fall from Grace

Abe carefully crept up behind the slig into the shadows where he waited, the guard walked down the hallway and took the turn off to the left. Abe knew of course that he wouldn't need to watch in-case the slig backtracked, he watched him for the past 10 minutes and knew that the slig would not be making he way back around for quite a while.

He took off down the hallway. Once he reached the end, he took the right, he stepped on a mine and died.

The end.

Dixanadu · #2 07-19-2010, 12:50 PM

Amazing, truly amazing!

Ridg3 · #3 07-19-2010, 12:51 PM

Here's some pos-rep for you my good sir...

ODDWORLDisTHEbest! · #4 07-19-2010, 01:48 PM

that started off very good, you should retract the ending and carry on!

STM · #5 07-20-2010, 02:28 AM

Good sir, you appear to have summed up the gist of what happens throughout oddworld, include some birds flapping away and you have yourself pos-rep!

Lord Stanley · #6 07-20-2010, 06:58 AM

Ha ha ha! That made me grin when I read that. Brilliant drama leading up to an explosive climax!

Dixanadu · #7 07-20-2010, 12:20 PM

I think Ridg3 is trying to capture the frustration we players feel after studying a Slig's movement, only to time our escape and be blown by a land mine!

A sequel would be in good order, I'd love one where Abe is being chased by a Scrab, only to miss the jump that could've saved him.

Ridg3 · #8 07-20-2010, 02:31 PM

:

I think Ridg3 is trying to capture the frustration we players feel after studying a Slig's movement, only to time our escape and be blown by a land mine!

A sequel would be in good order, I'd love one where Abe is being chased by a Scrab, only to miss the jump that could've saved him.

That isn't a bad idea...

Dixanadu · #9 07-20-2010, 02:54 PM

Or timing an electrical fence turning on wrong and being killed.

Ridg3 · #10 07-20-2010, 02:57 PM

:

Or timing an electrical fence turning on wrong and being killed.

Or pulling the wrong side of a lever and a boulder falls on you.

ODDWORLDisTHEbest! · #11 07-20-2010, 07:26 PM

or rolling under ten bone drills and escaping, only to fall down a gap...

Ridg3 · #12 07-21-2010, 01:32 AM

Or running into McDLT in the night.

Ridg3 · #13 07-21-2010, 06:35 AM

CHAPTER 2 - A moment in time

Landing on the ground, Abe heard a terrific high pitched roar from behind him. Looking back he gasped, for there was a scrab charging at him with menace in it's eyes. Scrambling to get upright he noticed that the road ahead isn't going to be easy due to the gaps in the floor.

'Fuck my life.' Abe muttered to himself as he ran. Holding tight his fear and breath he took a mighty leap across the gap in the floor. He stuck the jump.

'Phew...' He thought to himself, he stole a quick glance behind him and noticed that the scrab leapt over the gap with equal, if not more, ease. Determined not to get caught, he focused his attention on the next gap.

'One... two... three... Jump!'

Mid-leap Abe looked down and noticed that he mistimed the jump. So he fell down the hole and died.

OANST · #14 07-21-2010, 08:31 AM

The only fanfic ever that is worth reading.

Not including my Master Chief and Stranger sex fiction, that is.

Ridg3 · #15 07-21-2010, 12:57 PM

Well you know... I have so much creativity juices flowing that it needed vented. Probably the same story with you?

Dixanadu · #16 07-21-2010, 03:29 PM

:

'Fuck my life.' Abe muttered to himself as he ran.

You are fanfiction god.

ODDWORLDisTHEbest! · #17 07-21-2010, 03:39 PM

what about one where abe dodges loads of paramites, then jumps into a well only to find it isnt switched on and he gets eaten by paramites

Dixanadu · #18 07-22-2010, 05:48 AM

No, he tries to hit a bomb when it's green but failed!

Abe fell on the bomb, "NO i must save teh mudokins"
then the radio crackered and said, "no abe you are the miduokons"
Then Abe was a zombie.

Ridg3 · #19 07-22-2010, 11:01 AM

CHAPTER 3 - The Truth Hurts (why are these titles so GAY!)

Abe and Arn were standing about, talking about Abe's mortality rate.

"So, how is it that you are still alive even though you saved less that 50 Mudokons?" Arn asked in unashamed awe. Abe grunted a cool grunt whilst standing with his arms folded.

"I've tried explaining it to you squares before, but I'll try one more time before my gal gets here," Abe said, like a cool person.....

Once upon a time there was a spindly, fragile Mud named Abe. Abe was the butt of all jokes, the target of all bullies and the victim of many a cupcake.
In his bedroom, in front of his Billy Idol poster, he got on his knees and prayed to Allah. He beseech-ed this fine guy the power of immortality but Allah was all like, 'Uh-uh, bitch can't have none of that shit." Instead Allah invested in Abe, the Sands of Time.

However, not all things were all dandy, with this new found power Abe had the stability structure of a cream cracker. Every time the bullies beat him... he died, every time a fart was thrown in his face... he died.

But... whenever Abe dies, the sands of time react, and this reaction inside of Abe turns him into a flock of flying thingers, puts him to a safe place where he could replay the time before he died to avoid death.

"So as you can see... that wally, Molluck, had no chance of me dying, I just reversed time and blew that sex-pad to the sky without getting caught." Abe said smugly thinking of a pair of leather trousers, "Now if you excuse me..."

Abe took a running jump into a meat grinder and died.

****************************************

I just thought that I had to explain the whole bird thing properly.

EDIT: Abe's gal is very upset about Abe being dead and whatnot... thought you all should know.

ODDWORLDisTHEbest! · #20 07-22-2010, 01:26 PM

:

No, he tries to hit a bomb when it's green but failed!

nahhh, i like it where he has a big challenge, so big it would normally kill him, then he survives but dies in some stupid way, not gets blown up or anything.

Dixanadu · #21 07-23-2010, 12:17 PM

So gripping... T^T

STM · #22 07-23-2010, 12:31 PM

You could something erotic, like Abe and the new mudokon queen getting it on so that she has enough sperm to make new babies! oooh so seedyyyy! XD

But seriously this is genius!

Ridg3 · #23 07-23-2010, 03:28 PM

Bah... you two are my only true fans and for that you will always hold a spot in my heart.

OANST you cunt, why did you steal my limelight?

But even if I lose all viewers, I shall continue for I am committed to the story.

Lord Stanley · #24 07-23-2010, 05:34 PM

I always view this thread when there's new posts, but I wouldn't want a place in your heart even if you had one, Ridg3.

No being with a heart could do so many mean things to Abe (except the Oddworld Inhabitants, they're responsible.)

Ridg3 · #25 07-24-2010, 09:18 AM

CHAPTER 4: The Awakening.

Abe awoke with a startled gasp, he sashayed over to the window to where he thought the sound came from. He peeked out the window and seen three sligs marching their way resolutely to Abe's cabin.

*knock, knock, knock*

---

*knock, knock, knock*

---

*SMASH*

The sligs burst in through the door and glanced around the room, sadistic pleasure was foretold in the reddish glow of their visors.

"OVER HERE!" One of the sligs shouted. The other sligs made haste to see what happened.

"Looks like he beat us to it." said the slig who called out whilst staring at Abe's slowly swaying corpse.

*****************

Note to readers: I know the chapter titles are extremely misleading at some point's but never pay attention to them. They're random as fuck.

ODDWORLDisTHEbest! · #26 07-24-2010, 10:23 AM

haha, that one was great! this is one of the best fanfics on the forums!

Ridg3 · #27 07-24-2010, 10:30 AM

Cheers... the only bad thing is Abe keeps dying on me.

Dixanadu · #28 07-24-2010, 04:50 PM

I cried with glory.

Mr. Bungle · #29 07-26-2010, 03:00 AM

You do a great job of describing the pure dread in the atmosphere of the Oddworld series. Kudos to you, you are on par with Tolkien himself for creating such an awesome method of storytelling.

Can't wait for chapter 5!

MA · #30 07-26-2010, 12:47 PM

this is inspiring.