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  #1  
06-26-2003, 06:37 PM
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Reptile
Rabid Fuzzle
 
: Feb 2003
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Entering Blackness

This is the first of three chapters. We see the main character Jed, a Mudokon Poser who never got to see what life was in store before it exploded right into his face. He's in a plot with a destructive company, Odd himself and a Shaman who hasn't got a clue. Jed is meditating in his home village, not knowing whats around the corner....
____________________________________________________

The other Mudokons walked by not looking twice at the familiar Poser meditating in the orderly fashion. Then the comedian Flake, who runs up to the Poser.
"Jed! Good Odd I found you! Wake up!" It took a few violent shakes to wake Jed from his mystic meditation. "What is it?" The two of them walked towards the old Shaman hut, Minv and Jed entered.
The old wise father, Shal is on the brink of dying. "What happened?" asked Jed. The question allowed Minv to glare at Jed like a Scrab ready to pounce. "He's dying you dimwit! He was poisoned by this weird....plant thingy" Minv held up a blue like aqua plant, when Shal had a good eye to look remembers the fatal time
~~~~~~~~~~~FLASHBACK~~~~~~~~~~~

Shal and Xerxes entered the beautiful lagoon, where sparkling blue water and green trees abound. Both of them spoke in the old language. "This is......stunning." Xerxes wandered the mysterious Oasis. Shal looked up as he saw the clouds form to reveal the creator....the mystical......Odd.
Shal spoke in his original language. "Your......your.." Shal couldn't believe it, Odd was there....looking at him. "Yes my Mudokon brethen, it is I, Odd." His voice sounded thunderous, but also caring and soft. "Wha-what do you want." Shal sounded more scared then he was before. "You must prevent a massive invasion from happening, to get this power, you must eat the blue algae which grows in the grounds of the lake to my left." Shal looked at the floating blue plant on the surface, glowing with an eerie light. After a faint flash, Odd disappeared. Shal dived into the shallow water and retreived the blue plant, held it up, tilted his head back, and devoured the plant. Chewed it...spat it out because of melchy taste, felt an incredibly agonising pain in his abdomen, with a faint gasping, air he plunged in the water.
Xerxes heard the splash, rushed back and saw Shal in the water. "Holy dancing slog crap!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Shal's eyes closed as he entered a deep sleep. Jed and Minv left the hut. Minv began to walk away, turned to face Jed. "I'm not gonna rest till Shal turns out OK." Jed didn't reply, instead, he ran past Minv, into the wilderness, past the playing Paramites, past the resting Scrab, till he reached a far away place, where the other Mudokons couldn't reach.
Jed caught his breath, he walked towards a Mudokon, a Shaman, laying down asleep. It was a Shaman all right, looked kind of.....out of place. "Hello? You alive or just playing." the Shaman began to twitch his face, opened his eyes, and saw Jed.
"A Poser huh? Not much of village folk if you ask me." Jed's face began to look puzzled. Then, Jed heard a voice, of a familiar Flake, Minv. He had a couple of scratches on him. "What happened to you?" Minv moved his lips, but no sound came out.
The shaman rolled his eyes. "Hey dandruff flake, go away!" Jed looked at the Shaman. "Who are you anyway?" The shaman blinked. "Why, I'm Zidane, a shaman who is the master of.....stuff."
Minv looked at Zidane. "What kinda stuff?" Zidane began to creep downwards behind a rock. "Something I wish not to speak of." A thunderous sound in the sky, and moving clouds erupted, they opened to reveal Odd.
Minv's eyes popped out, Jed just stared in amazement, Zidane just said woop de doo in a sarcastic voice. "My three noble Mudokons, you will rise to become heroes to the war which will erupt in 48 hours, My Flake Minv, don't overgrow your desire to be one, there is no I in team, you must help your friends, Zidane, my rather un-educated shaman, you must learn the details of Oddworld to your fellow Shamans, to become a tribal leader. He was about to go when Jed made a violent outburst. "What about me?" Odd turned to Jed. "Oh you Poser Jed, you fear your own destiny, you must not fear it, or keep it, you must conquer it, for you will need this, as Shal couldn't in his state." Thunder striked Jed in the fore head, electricuting him violently, the thunder stopped, he now had a tatoo of Odd on his forehead. "Use it! use it, use it." His voice faded.
Minv looked puzzled. "Now what?" Jed rose, looking at both Zidane and Minv. "Now....it is time to work....."
_________________________________

What did you think of that, more to come. Reply and more will come i'm sure.
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  #2  
06-26-2003, 07:38 PM
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just_me
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: Jun 2003
: Finland
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Put some pictures in your story, then it would be more colourful
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  #3  
06-28-2003, 06:03 PM
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Reptile
Rabid Fuzzle
 
: Feb 2003
: Inside You
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3 miserable days seemed like 3 millieniums, the flake, poser and shaman finnally approached Jover Industries. "So, were just gonna look around and get out, badda bing badda boom." Jed and Minv looked at Zidane who was about to piss himself. "OK, lets just go." Zidane and Minv were enjoying themselves until fun time shattered.
Outside, 3 Armored Slig Poppers lie in wait. The three of them stopped. Minv went up to Jed. "What is it?" Jed, not looking at Minv, pointed in the open. Zidane looked at them, now both Minv and Jed knew Zidane could possess, so why not try it. Minv grabbed Zidane. "Hey, you're into all this mystic crap, possess one already and blow their metal asses away!" Zidane got a bit scared, "Alright, I'll do it." The yoing sound echoed through, one of the sligs was struck by an eerie light, the other two didn't see, the sligs soul was now Zidane's.
The Slig opened fire on the other two. The Zidane/Slig entered the power plant. The status board showed 13 Mudokon rebels were captured and held prisoner in the lower east deck.
The other Sligs greeted the Slig known as Vouren, the Slig under Zidane's control.
As Vouren approached the switch, he pulled it, prison doors opened. Tomahawkers and Mudarchers attacked the Sligs. Zidane exploded his host.
Then, a huge ship ascended from the side, It went away, and it headed for the Raisins Cave.
The small army escaped, but the 3 Muds went, followed the ship, and the final battle will be unleashed.
________________________________________

OK this ones short i know, but the final one will be longer, because somethings very VERY bad will happen, to find out, stay tuned.
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  #4  
06-30-2003, 04:11 AM
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Al the Vykker
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: Oct 2001
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So far very good reptile. I know you said that you would be ending it after the next chapter. But I hope you write some more fan fictions soon also.

Keep up your good work!
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