Splat

[The Red Muse]

Is...this the end? O_O

*sniffles*

I love this fic!

*waves flag*
Three hurrah's for Splat!

[Splat]

If you mean the end of the fic, not by a long shot. Glad you like and wer u bin musy? I've been missin ya!

[T-nex]

okay then... So let's continue with this!! NOW!! OR I WILL EAT ALL THE CHAPTERS!!!

[Splat]

STOP EATING MY CHAPTERS! THEY ARE PRIVATE PROPERTY! IF YOU DON'T STOP EATING MY CHAPTERS THEN I'LL STOP POSTING CHAPTERS AND YOU'LL NEVER KNOW HOW IT ENDS AND YOU WILL ALL DIE SAD AND MISERABLE WITH NO IDEA OF HOW THE STORY ENDS AND WHAT THE SEQUALS WERE GONNA BE ABOUT!!! *takes breath*, oh boy, long sentence. Anyway, before i faint, chapter... something!

Chapter 36

Splat
The first sign that I was approaching the bunks was an increase in the number of bloodstains. And the smell. I’m yet to visit a factory, lab or mine where the mudokons quarters didn’t stink like a dead glukkon. This place was no exception and a few minutes later I was walking past a large board labelled: “Mudokon Bunks ahead, no unortherised entry.”
I muttered something less-than-polite under my breath and kept walking. A few minutes later I came across a story stone and stuffed my hand into it:

Due to highly paranoid security precautions, up ahead you will find 5 doors. One of these doors will lead you to the Mudokon Bunks; the other 4 will result in various forms of painful death. If you have authorisation but do not know the door, please ask the head of security for advice. If your name is Abe, please pick the wrong door. Thank you for your time.

Weird.
Another 10 metres along the corridor twisted sharply to the right, opening into a chamber with 5 doors leading from it; on each door was a picture. They were a hammer, a star, a scrab, a cog and a black oval. I stared at the 5 pictures on the 5 doors and one thought crossed my mind: can I ask the audience?

Stay calm Splat; just think about it! I thought, 5 doors, Mudokon Bunks. Well mudokons are slaves and slaves have… hammers? No, too obvious, not even sligs are that stupid.
Scrab then? Scrab means death, you want to avoid death so you wouldn’t bother to pick a scrab, right? Unless they’re using reverse-psychology; I’d come back to that one.
A star then? But why a star… you’re more likely to find that on a glukkons office but if the door lead to a painful death… Odd, I hate reverse-psychology!
A cog… nothing springs to mind there. I’ll come back to that one too.
And the black oval. Sorta looks like a hole I guess. That does almost look like a trapdoor beneath it. Ok, cancel hole.
Scrab, star or cog. I’m pretty sure the scrab is just reverse psychology. You think a scrab is to forced to be a bad thing so you pick it but that’s just what the glukkons want you to think so… ok, I’m just confusing myself now, star or cog?
Nothing about those two have any message of painful death. No clue comes from what I’m seeing here. What are the odds of getting it write through complete guess? 50%. Fine then, I’ll toss a coin for it.
I pulled a 1-moolah coin from my backpack and flipped it into the air. “Wings is cog,” I muttered as it flipped in mid air; I caught it in my left hand and pressed it onto the back of my right hand. Taking a deep breath, I parted my fingers a looked down at the face-up symbol on the coin.
It had come up mandibles, which meant I was going to try the star door. “Oh odd, please let this be the right one,” I muttered quietly. I stepped forward and reached out for the metal door handle…
METAL DOOR HANDLE!!! I shot a look around the room at all the other doors. They each had a wooden handle except this one. My hand hovered about a centimetre above the metal. Why should this one be metal when all the rest were wooden? An image of 50,000 volts of electricity (the official execution level) passing through my body entered my head; I bent down and peered at the handle.
Yes, there was a spot on the very bottom of it that looked as if someone had welded a wire onto the handle. I shuddered when I thought of how close to a painful death I had come and stepped back. Which door was it then? Suddenly I found myself not trusting the cog painted onto the door. Well hurry up and choose Splat, the readers are getting bored! I thought. It was then that I remembered the words said to me by a dying mudokon only 25 minutes ago: “Mudokons are the cogs that make this place work… it’s on the door…” How could I be so stupid? I walked up to the door and reached out for the handle.
Just before I touched it I felt a sting of static electricity; my arm drew back instinctively. I paused for a second. Warning of death or paranoid security system? Glukkons wouldn’t accept a trap that let people know when they were gonna die. I took a deep breath and reached out for the handle. My hand closed over the wooden handle… and I let out the breath. Nothing had happened.
I twisted the handle and as I did, I felt the floor below me lurch. I quickly released the handle and stepped back, looking at the tile I was standing on. It was sliding up to become level with the rest of the floor; I reached over it and turned the handle: it lurched down but then returned to its place. “Man, these guys are paranoid,” I muttered. I stepped onto the tile again and shoved the door open, instantly there was a loud screech from the other side like a scrab’s. I ignored it and shoved the door open the rest of the way; it opened out into a narrow, empty corridor. There was a deathly silence. A stench of blood and sweat and chemicals washed over my body like water. This was definitely the bunks. I took a deep breath of the fresh air from behind me and turned to the corridor.


Drawing near the end of the story, pretty soon I'll be writing the sequal! I'll finish Splat before i stop for the summer anyway. (oh, and cool banner T)

[Seargentbig]

Hooray!
... I think that's all...

[T-nex]

OOH!! ME? You like my banner????? WEEEEEEE ^_^ !!!! Thanx...

In return i must say that it's a cool story! Really humorous!

[Splat]

Cheers T!
I'm on work experience rite now: it's basically where my school sends us all off to do some job or other for a random company: just an excuse to get the kidsout of the school for a week. I reallyshouldnt be doing this on this computer cause itsa public need-only thing! Better go soon, I'll try and post the next chapter on Sunday but i mite not manage it, the stories almost finished now anyway: about 2 more chapters and an epilogue... then a sequel! YAY, SEQUELS!
See you Sunday hopefully! *runs off as superviso enters the room*

[Splat]

Gah, no time for message, being kicked off by parents.


Chapter 37

Splat
Mudokon bunks were never kept clean but this was definitely the worse I had or have ever seen since. When I’d first entered the labs I’d decided that the stench was artificially generated to be pumped out of the smoke machines; now I decided that the air from the smoke machines was pumped directly from here.
But I wasn’t gonna be stopped now: I had come here for a reason and now that I was so close to my goal after battling killer-meeps and brain-dead vykkers, nothing was gonna stop me, not even a terrified scrab in my head!
The corridor I found myself in was made of smoky-black metal marked with the occasional dark bloodstain or mouldy corpse (not that that’s anything knew to me). After walking down the corridor for about 20 minutes I came to the first of the cells. An open door in the left wall of the corridor revealed a room with 9 very small and empty cells; there was a sign on the door labelled: “VACANT”. A few moments later I came to another door, also open, on the right hand side. It had the same sign and the same 9 empty cells.
If anything, the cells were more disgusting than the corridor: the smell of death and sweat and blood was about 50 times as strong and the walls and floors were plain sick, especially the floors actually inside the cages. They might have been florescent yellow for all I could tell but, for all the blood and mould, I couldn’t see them at all!
Every cell I walked past was empty, with the door open, a sign saying “VACANT” and 9 empty cells. It was no wonder that the 10 from Abe’s village had been sent here; they must have been getting through 100 slaves a day! There were enough cells for thousands of mudokons but not one of them with anything in them more intelligent than mould. There weren’t even ratz in this place!
Once again I began to think of the thousands of mudokons killed here. It was just sick what the glukkons were doing.
It was an hour later and I was starting to worry: what if the guys I was looking for were dead too? Every other cell was empty. I was really starting to worry when, thank Odd, I spotted a closed door in the corridor wall very near the corridor with a sign saying “ENGAGED” on the door.
I ran to the door and pulled it open. I looked round quickly and took in a computer terminal that was switched on with a dead and half-rotten slig carcass lying over it and the same 9 cages. 9 cages, 8 of which contained a beaten up mudokon and the ninth containing 2. I felt a screech of triumph welling up inside of me from one o my animal-sides. I quickly forced it down.
One of the mudokons slowly opened an eye towards me. Instantly he turned to stare at me with both eyes and then yelled in joy: “SPLAT!!!”
“Shut up,” I hissed, glancing back down the corridor.
All the mudokons were staring at me now: 2Odd, I can’t believe you actually found us! I thought…” he seemed to notice me looking nervous and said: “Don’t worry, no one ever comes down here, the floors of the cells open up and drop us into the room they want us. Odd, I can’t believe you actually found us!”
“Splat, in about 2 minutes that’s gonna happen to us! There’s a timer over there.” I glanced over to a wall were a timer was counting down and was on 1 minute 56 seconds already. “Splat, you gotta get us out.
“Where are the keys?”
“It’s worked with the computer, the cell control window’s under the one open now.”
I ran over to the computer: it was a WINDIES ST computer, one of the newest makes but still really annoying. I was about to close the window in front but then froze as I looked at the program it was running: mudokNfindR 7.8… and someone had logged in! It was all so… I could hardly believe it… hardly believe my luck, it was all here, this could be my only chance to get some of my life back together! But then…
“Splat? What are you waiting for, open the cages!”
“1 minute, 20 seconds,” Muttered another.
“HOW THE HECK DO I MINIMIZE THIS FLIPPIN WINDOW?!?”
“You can’t, just close it!”
No way I could do that. “I’m to close,” I muttered in answer. “I can’t, not now!”
“Splat, we’ve got a minute and 10 seconds till we become test subjects!”
I ignored him, I was to close, I would have time. I opened the search engine and typed in the code:
SITE: DHM34056 (my village)
CODE: 0784555 (His prisoner code, one number below mine, he was captured just before me).
I clicked enter… and waited… The mudokons behind me were all screaming something about 50 seconds… “Come on, come on!” I muttered…
I swear, never let a computer know you’re in a hurry! Balgits, very rich creator of WINDIES computers, must hate everyone! He just obsesses in making computers that always slow down when you’re in a hurry! Now was no exception: “Stupid, stupid thing!”
There was an edge of panic in the mudokons voice: “Splat, I don’t know what you’re doing but I think you should know that in 25 seconds the 10 of us are gonna be killed.”
Come on! I slapped the monitor.
“20.”
Please!
“15 seconds Splat.”
Come on! I faced the hardest decision of my life: get some of my old life back or… give up what might be my only chance of that ever happening and take on a new life with Abe in the most famous village among slaves and captives in Mudos? But loose the last guy out there who ever really cared for me and would still care for me even as I was now?
“10 seconds Splat, it’s now or never…”



What will he choose? Next time its the final chapter of Splat! (Not including the Epilogue or sequels). What will he choose?

(sorry, had to put it in)

[Seargentbig]

Ohhhh... What will he choose?

[T-nex]

AAAAAAAAAARGH!! ONLY ONE CHAPTER LEFT???? OH nOO? Oh well..

[Splat]

Sorry T, sad but true (still, theres always the sequals )
I just finished writing this story (after 4 years of work) so i'll post chapter 38 on Saturday so only the epilogue will be left

[T-nex]

But.... The sequals are never the same as the first part!!

Oh.... 4 years of work..... It has been long.... I think you should publish you story :P

[Seargentbig]

Not exactaly true. Unplanned sequals are never the same as the first part. Coming from splat, it should be just as good.

[Splat]

It is planned, this story is building to it.
Havent you ever wondered about Splat's past or what the sligs were talkin about in chapter 8? Some will be revealed in the sequel...

[Killa_47]

When is the sequel out?

[Seargentbig]

When the original's finished. Duh.

[Splat]

I'm hoping the sequels will be as good as the original and as for when to expect them, what Searge said (and as for added accuracy, see the trailer which i will post at the end of the fic)

Ok, as the summer officially begins today, i will post the last chapter today and you can expect the epilogue on Sunday or Monday providing i have enough replies.
So you all wanna hear what Splat's doing? You wanna know what he chooses NOW? Well, (and heres another one of your vague hints to the Oddworld Story searge), tough!

Chapter 38

Abe
When you help save a guy accused of killing a bunch of people it’s not uncommon to become hated by everyone in the village. When a mudokon hates someone they’ll hate them properly for a few days, scowling at them, sticking out a foot to trip them up, shoving them out of a tree, you get the idea (and I get the scars). Then they sort of realise they’re wasting energy in kicking you about when they could do just as good a job by simply ignoring you 24 7. And I’m not talking “hey look, a mudokon-shaped rock” ignore, I’m talking full scale, “weird, an invisible mass is blocking the door, maybe if I take a swing at it, it will evaporate” ignore.
It was all right for Alf: after a week or 2 people realised that if he was invisible he couldn’t serve drinks. So Alf made a deal with em: they stop ignoring us all the time and he’d reopen his bar.
Now they only ignored me some of the time. Some of the time being whenever Alf wasn’t around.
So to avoid being slapped by people trying to make the invisible mass they kept (almost purposely) walking into evaporate (they were surprisingly good aims, considering they couldn’t see me), I started spending a lot more time in Alf’s. That still didn’t stop them flicking jellybeans at me when I wasn’t looking… or when I was looking for that matter.
And when you’re spending all your time down the local pub and there’s a risk of being slapped till you really do evaporate if you go outside you don’t have much time left over to get ready for a voyage out of the village to some factory somewhere or other.
Add to that that Munch kept disappearing for various amounts of time every so often and my life was getting boring (unless you think that getting bombarded with jellybeans everywhere you go as fun).
It was a couple of months after Splat had first legged it that Munch appeared in Alf’s Rehab and Tea after not being seen for 2 weeks (his longest disappearance yet).
Munch hopped into the bar quietly and said calmly, “ALF, ALF, AAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!! ALF, I HAD THE GREATEST IDE-” Munch was cut off as he charged straight into me, throwing us both to the ground.
“Whoa, sorry Abe,” he said quickly as we disentangled ourselves and sorted out which limbs belonged to who, “I didn’t see you there!”
Several other drunks in the bar sniggered. Munch turned back to Alf, “Alf, I had the greatest idea of how you can drag in more customers.”
“Come on Munch, I got enough customers as it is. I don’t really need any more.”
“Oh, but Alf, look, it’s the same bums every night, when they die you’ll have no one else!”
Alf looked worried: “You really think so?”
“Definitely, but don’t worry, I got a great idea that’ll save your bar.”
"I dunno Munch, this isn’t gonna be like that time you got us to interview loads of animals is it?” Yup, it’s true, Munch had the amazing idea that interviewing scrabs and fleeches would help the bar. And for some unknown reason, Alf had agreed (at least up till he realised Munch didn’t intend on using cages, course by then it was too late!)
“Nah, it’s better than that, think of it Alf: the room fills, the lights go up and you walk onto stage and announce… ALF’S REHAB AND TEA’S, FIRST! ANNUAL!! TALENT SHOW!!!”
“I dunno Munch, I mean, I don’t even have a stage. And-”
Alf was interrupted by one of the guys in the corner, “Hey, yeah. Me and my mates here, we got a sketch that’ll bring down the house.”
“Great,” Munch yelled, “Hey, come on, lets go tell everyone on the village! When you gonna hold it Alf?”
“Munch, I-”
“Monday? GREAT!”
And so saying, Munch was out of the door and away before anyone could stop him!

It had been an… interesting night. Alf had had a stage built at the back of the bar room (Munch really hadn’t left him much choice) and had finally agreed to hold the thing when Munch had said he’d sell tickets and arrange all the acts (REALLY bad idea).
The bums from the pub had done a really disturbing sketch involving a lot of beer and a few dresses. A few people had tried (and failed) to sing various songs and one guy (may Odd rest his soul) had tried to interview a scrab.
But now it was time for the final act (one Munch had arranged himself). The lights went dim as a massive chair was wheeled onto stage and about 10 mudokons got into slightly disturbing poses around it. The 2000 odd mudokons in the hall shut up as Munch announced the act:
“And as one final treat for all you lucky guys out there (Alf was sobbing about loosing everything by this point) I give you the Regurgitation Roomies (yeah, that’s what I thought) and their song… VYKKERS LABS!!!”

(To the tune of “Tragedy”, you know, the really annoying song)

Lights are low so all you can see are the silhouettes of 10 mudokons in disturbing poses and the large-backed chair that seems empty.
Music starts up into verse 1:
(Mudokons in really high voices)
Verse 1
We’ve been sent to a lost and lonely part of town,
Vykkers Labs is a great big place that makes us frown!
We wanna go home
But we can’t do it on our own:
We really wanna be legging it (bum, bum)
Legging it (bum, bum)
But we cant escape (bum, bum)
We can’t escape-ape-ape-ape-ape-ape-ape-ape

Chorus 1
VYKKERS LABS! We don’t wanna go in to this loony bin!
VYKKERS LABS! We are just fuzzles in the vykkers eyes,
Life’s hard to bare,
Vykkers live there: so we wanna be else where!
(REPEAT)

Musical interlude in which mudokons on stage change position with each beat in a very disturbing way
Music starts up into verse 2
Verse 2
Night and day, mudokon slaves cry out in pain
They’re beaten up, then tortured and then beaten up again.
Let’s get out of here,
Even if it takes us a thousand years.
Now soon we will be legging it (bum, bum)
Legging it (bum, bum)
Running away (bum, bum)
Running away-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay-ay

Chorus 2
VYKKERS LABS! We will get away whatever way,
VYKKERS LABS! Let’s make a stand and leave this land
I declare!
We’ll escape from here and we’ll go live elsewhere!
(REPEAT)

Music fades

There was a stunned silence: none of us had ever heard anything more cheesy in all our lives! That was when the figure stood up out of the chair: we couldn’t see him properly but the silhouette was clear enough.
“Splat” Alf and I groaned in unison. Every other mudokon in the hall was evidently angry. Several people screamed and I think one guy had a seizure!
“Splat, you got a lot o nerve turnin up here after you ate those 10 guys!”
“10 guys? What 10 guys?”
“Don’t give us that,” yelled another mudokon, “just before you ran off you sneaked into the village and ate Bill, Tim, Ted, Marco, Bruce, Lea, Bruno, Frank, Polo and Reginald!”
Oh yeah,” Answered Splat, “I remember now! Ok, so you’re probably gonna come after me in an angry mob now with your pitchforks and torches and so on but before you do, I wanna introduce you to my backup singers: Bill, Tim, Ted, Marco, Bruce, Lea, Bruno, Frank, Polo and Reginald! THE REGURGITATION ROOMIES!!!”
The lights came on, revealing the 10 mudokons around Splat. There was a stunned silence. “So Abe,” Splat asked, “I guess these guys won’t be tryin to kill me for a while now so I ain’t got much to do… You want my help with your next mission?”


So what do ya think? It all ends on Monday (in theory) so see ya then!

[Seargentbig]

Whoop! He Saved them!
...how did he get back?

[Splat]

he walked... (Well if Abe and his mates can walk across a desert in a day, it won't take Splat that long will it?)

[Seargentbig]

Fair point...
So... now for the Epilogue

[Splat]

Which i will post as soon as i get another reply.
(Wat did u guys think of my song? (you better appreciate it, i spent ages on that!!!)
Well anyway, almost everything's ready, even the trailer for the next story (that's right, a trailer!), all i need is one more reply and i will have finished with this story for all eternity at least until i decide to edit the whole thing.

so L8R DUDES!

[erwinraaben55]

This is a quick reply, so get on with it NOW, please

[erwinraaben55]

okay, now it is time to finish the first story, GO SPLAT, post it now

[Splat]

Really? Are you sure? Cause if you want i could wait like another month or so?

Just kiddin, don't be so impatient though, i was on holiday all last week. But enough of this, i now present you with the epilogue and the all powerful... TRAILER!!!!!!


Epilogue

So Splat was allowed back into the village, Munch (eventually) admitted to making the whole “psychopathic monster” up. He also admitted to putting the whole village through the torture of the talent show so he could prove that Splat (who he’d been meeting with in the forest) wasn’t cannibalistic. Abe got back to his mudokon-saving (cause, he now had 2 people to follow him around when the risk of painful death wasn’t too high). And the Regurgitation Roomies got a recording deal till their manager realised they only knew one song. And so, life in the village returned to how it had never been before cause they’d never had a scrabaramitoken in the village before but apart from that it was the same as it was before!

But meanwhile, many miles northward, a pair of sligs bunged a prisoner back into its cage. “And don’t try and escape again,” One of the sligs told the luckless mudokon as he slammed the door. Once they were a few paces down the corridor he turned to his friend and said, angrily, “Odd, she is such a pain!”
“Don’t worry Galk,” His partner told him, “Just remember, 2 more weeks and she’s gone!” The pair walked down the corridor away from a solitary figure crouched head down in the back of an unusually clean cell…


THE MIDDLE!!!



And i would just like to say thanks to all my fans and everyone else who has ever read this story, but especially, THE RED MUSE (been behind me sinse the beginning waving that flag), SEARGENT BIG (dude! That's all i have to say), AL THE VYKKER (glad to know you have confidence in one of your humble worshippers), NATIVE POSER (gone but not forgotten), T-NEX (you is mad dude!) AND FLAMER THE RED (supporting me backstage)!

And cause i know you're all dying from suspense, i give you... the great... the worshipped... the ALL POWERFUL TRAILER OF THE SEQUEL OR SEQUAL OR HOWEVER YOU'RE MEANT TO SPELL IT!!!!! (and anyone who says I-T will die)


Trailer to the sequel

The screen is black. Then words slowly appear on the screen:
THEY THOUGHT IT WAS OVER.
The words fade and are replaced with:
THEY WERE WRONG.
The words fade and the screen remains black for a few seconds then the silence is suddenly broken buy a roll of thunder and the sound of rain. There is a flash of lightning across the screen, which fades to a cut of a stormy nighttime sky. A random voice says:
“This is a turning point for the future of your species!”
Quiet action music begins in the background. The thunder and rain continue. Words appear again:
COMING SOON(ER OR LATER)…
Abe’s voice:
“There are a lot of mudokons out there: a little more appreciation and a little less attention would be nice.”
Words:
THE EXITING SEQUEL TO SPLAT!
Munch:
“150 baby gabbits screaming for attention take up a lot of your day.”
Words:
WHEN THE PAST, THE PRESENT AND THE FUTURE COLLIDE:
Alf:
“Stocks are low and so are customers: never thought I’d say this but Munch was right!”
Words:
NO ONE IS PREPARED!
Music stops suddenly, leaving just the sound of the rain. Splat’s face seems to half appear in front of the stormy scene as you hear his words.
Splat:
“Do you know what it’s like to be tied up and forced to watch as your best friend is murdered?”
There is a flash of loud thunder and lightning, both fade to leave silence and a black screen again. Slowly, three letters appear on the screen for a second before fading to blackness again:
AMY


see ya guys, post your opinions of the whole story and i may post the edited version at some point!

[erwinraaben55]

Here is a nice( if I may say myself :P)"Word" of the great story made by splat.

It took me some time, but it is now finished (thanks to the quick reply for the last things splat :P)

So, especially for the new ones, who haven't read this great story, take the Word document, to experience it in a much better way .


I hope you like it splat.


EDIT: OOPS, did something wrong (see next post) to download the right one, see my next post

[Seargentbig]

Er... erwinraaben55, it's a good thought and all, but... um... this story isn't The Oddworld Story, it's Splat.
Just a touch of revision and I can have this story treasured on the computer for the admiration of all.

[erwinraaben55]

Er... erwinraaben55, it's a good thought and all, but... um... this story isn't The Oddworld Story, it's Splat.
Just a touch of revision and I can have this story treasured on the computer for the admiration of all.

DAMMIT, you are right. I had my thoughts, but I thought, well, thought nothing after that, hehe.

I had interpretated (or how you call that :P) the first 2 sentences of this topic wrong,I think

Well, let me change it emediately.

[Splat]

Whoa, thats great! I'll have to send you the edited version so you can do that one up.
If/when i post it I'll try to make sure to get on the itallics and bold and so on. The problem with the forums is that you can't indent paragraphs or align up text: a lot of the stuff i wrote at home includes centred text. Oh well, it's great anyway, i love your presentation.

What did you think of the ending searge?


(Oh, and erwinraaben, if you're interested i do have another story called the oddworld story if you bother to search for it. I wrote (and finished) it ages ago and i don't think its great myself (see? I'm pputting myself down already-the mark of a true writer!!! ) but you can see what you think. Don't feel obliged to make up a presentation copy of that as well)

[Seargentbig]

I think the ending was highly suitible. I liked the one about the Regurgitation Roomies, heh.

[T-nex]

UUH wow! I only had time to write now, since i was on holyday in two weeks and my net has problems... But congrats you did a great job, and i'm just dieyng to read the sequal.... WEE FOR SPLAT!