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Transformers 2. That movie was pure shit. I went in expecting just an action romp, what I got was a pile of shit. The story line is too fucking retarded to go "Oh its just an action movie". Its like every night Michael Bay took every drug imaginable and that is how the plot for T2 was made. There were too many characters and side storylines that didn't need to be there and felt stupid. Worst of all the action wasn't even that good. There are only two good fight scenes, one its hard to tell what the fuck is going on, the other is at the end when you dont even care anymore and wonder if you should just walk out right now or not. I would rather watch Meet The Spartans 100 times over than see this pile of Michael Bay's cum shit again.
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The plot confused you? It was pretty straightforward and they explained it like four times.
Here, let me explain it.
Spoilers, bitches.
Soundwave (the satellite, also my favorite transformer) finds out that the piece of the Energon cube the military has is not guarded against his cat that can vomit knives. He ejaculates said cat to retrieve it. The cat, being a lazy bastard like all cats, vomits some knives to do the job, they're successful. Meanwhile, Soundwave dicks around in space and finds out Megatron is at the bottom of the ocean being molested by octopi. Realizing that he's a Decepticon and therein a big hypocrite, Soundwave decides to save Megatron by releasing a message to some Construction robots so colourful they should be in a mechanized ensemble of The Village people through the satellite he's tentacle raping
Said Robots hook up with Soundwave's cat and take the energon shard from him because
real men abuse animals. After falling into the ocean like reatrds and sinking deeper into the ocean like retards and removing the Octopi like retards they finally manage to bring Megatron back form the dead. Hail Satan!.
Megatron fucks off from Earth because he wants to get as far away from the Octopi as possible. Starscream makes an appearance and promptly gets the shit kicked out of him for trying to save some unborn children. An old bearded robot that looks like it should be in the final sequence of The Mtrix Revolutions appears to tell Megatron that he needs to fuck shit up and eat a young human child's brain so he can find out where the Machine that will blow up our sun is.
