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  #121  
11-06-2005, 02:02 PM
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Chapter 75
50:00
Now in my bigbro body, I moved on through the zulag. I soon reached a largish room with five identical machines in it. Torture devices.
Each machine had a wide, bowl-shaped base, and three rods with rounded blue tips around the edges of the bowls. Over each bowl was a mudokon, suspended upside down. The rods on the base sent little bolts of electricity directly into their faces. The tears would drop into the bowls below.
The only other things in the room were the computer terminal where the slig operated these devices - looking very bored, I noted - and a door against the far wall.
Easy. I walked over to the slig, who looked up. “Hi.”
“Hi.”
“What?”
“Go take a break. I’ll take over in here for a while.”
The slig yawned. “Sure. You work this console before?”
I had no intention of using it. “No shit, Sherlock. Just go have a smoke or something.”
He shrugged and moved towards the door in back. He went through and I caught a glimpse of a smoky room full of sligs, talking and playing pool.
The break room.
I gave the slig a thirty second head start, then followed him into the break room, Blitzpacker raised.
Now that I was inside, I had time to see five more mudokons, each walking around and serving mugs of koffee. Didn’t want them to get caught in the crossfire.
“Look out!”
The mudokons dropped their trays and fell into crouches, then lowered their heads and covered them with their arms.
The sligs, meanwhile, didn’t know what to make of me barging in and shouting. Several were standing and grabbing guns, but not enough.
I unloaded with the Blitzpacker.
YOW! What power! I tore through the room, cutting down the sligs, and being careful not to aim too low.
I dropped the Blitzpacker and switched back to my mudokon body. After climbing down off of the large BigBro Pants, I began chanting. The mudokons all stood, and, cheering, they came running and jumping through the bird portal.
Time to go get the mudokons out of those torture devices. I went back to the last room and inspected the control panel. After trying a few buttons - and accidentally shocking a few mudokons - I decided that I would have better luck trying a verbal override.
Which meant … Druna.
I made it as quick as possible, as speaking to her was getting more and more awkward. She gave me the morph, and I made the change.
As Avid, I spoke at the console. “Hey!”
After a second … “Hey! What?”
“Turn off the torture devices! Do it!”
“Bleh!”
And it was done. The clasps on the mudokon’s ankles came loose, dropping them onto the floors.
I transformed again and had time to notice how exhausted I was. So many transformations so fast… I didn’t know how long I’d be able to keep it up.
The mudokons were all angry. They began to beat each other up pretty fast, as though it was each other’s fault.
I growled. Not cool. “Stop it!”
They all spun at me, and decided they were being foolish. It didn’t change the fact that they were pissed.
“Look, sorry, but what the hell? I was trying to get you out!”
I realized they didn’t understand me, so I repeated myself in whistle speak.
They all looked ashamed, then apologized. With everyone calmed down, I chanted yet again, and sent these guys home.
Almost done with this zulag. Five more mudokons were around in here somewhere …
The only part of the zulag I hadn’t checked was …
Ha. The boiler room.

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  #122  
11-06-2005, 03:40 PM
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Tic, Toc, Tic, Toc, I feel like in the "24" tv series, and I'm sure Dante would... if he knew what it was. But for now, kill me more, I want cadavers, blood, and flaming poo bags all around! Now back to work and write us some more!!! Get tactical marines!
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  #123  
11-07-2005, 12:51 AM
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Boiler rooms, those are always interesting places! What will he find there today? Slogs? Greeters? mines? flying boulders? I'm sure you'll come up with something good.

He's doing well now as long as he doesn't get too worn out.
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  #124  
11-07-2005, 12:14 PM
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I rewrote this chapter to change it up. Things have been getting a little repetitive, haven't they? But isn't this what Abe did? Kill the sligs, free the muds. Solve a puzzle, free the muds. Kill the sligs, free the muds. Solve a puzzle, free the muds. Kill the sligs, free the muds. Solve a puzzle, free the muds. Anyway.

Chapter 76

46:00
There I was, in the boiler room. By now, I was a glukkon again, and was able to walk in freely.
The boilers stood high, majestic, and somewhat unsettlingly. The lighting was dim and orange. The boilers were arranged in a rough triangle, lining the center of the room. It was stiflingly hot. I could only imagine how hot it would be in the center of the boilers.
Because that’s where the mudokons were; tied to poles running from floor to ceiling in the center of the boilers. The heat would be unbearable, and they all looked to be unconscious.
Because it was so hot in here, sligs couldn’t be on patrol. And it was too close quarters for bigbros, who could stand the heat. Glukkons, who enjoy heat like this, were too important to be down here at all.
So they put a bunch of greeters down here to check for intruders, monitor the boilers, and administer the occasional shock to the mudokons, as added punishment for whatever crime had gotten them in here in the first place.
My first thought was of the story Orion had told me, about how Abe had destroyed Soulstorm Brewery by blowing up the boilers. It occurred to me that I could do the same.
But then the idea was shot down. Trying to sabotage the boilers now would be a disaster. There were still over a hundred mudokons on the premises, and they would all be needlessly killed. Further, setting them up to explode would likely give me even less time than I already had.
So, assuming there was a later, I would come back only after saving all the mudokons.
Now, to get those mudokons free.
Trouble with greeters is, if there’s anything in an area it doesn’t recognize, or it knows isn’t supposed to be in the area, it kills it. That goes for glukkons just as much as it does mudokons.
What could I use to combat the greeters? I didn’t have any morphs that could handle the heat and maneuver through their sensor devices…
[VISION]
an intern walks into the boiler room and walks right up to a greeter. the greeter does not zap him. the intern presses a button under the greeter’s toothy mouth, and a brake pops out underneath it, holding it still. the greeter’s mouth opens up, and the intern reaches in to perform some kind of maintenance.
[/VISION]
Intern? Could I trust this vision?
Sure I could. They’ve all been true before.
Okay. I switched over to mudokon form, then contacted Pyll, the leader of the cannibal mudokons.
{Pyll? Remember me?} It would have to do as a greeting.
{Yes.} Matter of fact. I think he still resented my victory in our morphing contest.
{I need that intern power. Help me out?}
{Yeah, whatever.}
That done, I began to chant, switching over to the intern body.
I suddenly had a thought … if, when the power went out, the Zippys went down, why didn’t the greeters, as well? Then, an answer, just as prompt: Greeters are charged to last for days and have their own AI, while Zippys are controlled remotely by a main computer. Whatever.
Now and intern, I closed my mouth tightly. I didn’t need the greeter to mistake the shape of my head and give me a jolt.
I tiptoed into the room (realizing as I did that the heat no longer bothered me) and walked up to a greeter. It did not react, except to say “Hi.”
I reached forward, as I had seen in my vision, and found a small button hidden under its lower lip. I pressed it and heard a chunk. That was the break.
The greeter’s teeth separated, opening the mouth. Inside was a small console with three options.
Recognized Employees
System Check
Terminate

I thought about it … terminating each and every greeter in here - there had to be ten - would take too long. So, I’d leave it to the greeters.
I pressed the screen on the first option. It suddenly switched to two lists. Allowed and Not Allowed. The only items that were allowed were interns and greeters. The unallowed list was much longer, starting with mudokons, and including sligs, glukkons, vykkers, and, unexpectedly, steefs. Even though there were hardly ever any steef seen around this part of Mudos (the two I met on my trek likely the only exception), there they were.
Whatever. I moved “greeter” over to the Not Allowed list, and, after a moment, moved mudokons to Allowed.
I stood back and pressed the button, closing the greeter back up and reactivating it. I walked away and transformed again. I turned around in time to see the greeter shocking two of its own. Three of them, nearby, must have detected this, and were programmed to react to such behavior as a malfunction punishable by destruction. They rolled over to the first greeter, and both shocked it. At this point, another greeter had come over and caught these two, and shocked them. The remaining four had shocked each other, leaving two in the room.
Now a mudokon, not to mention an exhausted mudokon susceptible to the intense heat in the room, and satisfied that the reprogramming had worked, I ran over to untie the mudokons with no fear.
It took three minutes to untie them all. In that time the greeters somehow managed to destroy each other.
I chanted immediately and the mudokons leapt to freedom.
I bolted out of the room, now not having any guards to worry about, and back to the hub. A quick call to Druna and a quick chant got me rolling as a glukkon again.
I entered the ball car and pressed the Emergency Switch again, connecting myself to the control room.
“Hey! Do it! Move this ball car to the sales department!”
“Yes, sir!” came the slig’s reply.


Last edited by Dave; 11-08-2005 at 12:24 PM.. : Salws = Sales with a typo. W and E arw right nwxt to wachothwr. Gimmw a brwak.
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  #125  
11-07-2005, 12:38 PM
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Haha, that greeter bit had me laugh! Very nice solution XD. Keep up teh story!
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  #126  
11-08-2005, 02:25 AM
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Ah, I love greeters. Great chapter, I'm assuming Dante's now on his way to sales cus you actually said salws which is probably an understandable mistake,but a little confusing in this situation.
Keep going!
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  #127  
11-08-2005, 11:47 AM
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Great coupla chapters dave! The greeter bit was cool and funny, and both chapters were really good. You have me wating for more.
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  #128  
11-08-2005, 02:36 PM
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Yes. Salws = sales. The w and e are right next to each other.

Chapter 77
34:00
I stepped off of the ball car after an uncomfortably long five minute ride. I was in a room I had once worked in: the fone room. Where all business (and more than a few personal) fone calls were made.
Not many people came in during the day - everyone entered in the morning and left in the evenings. So my appearance after the normal arrival time turned more than a few heads. In fact everyone turned to look.
The room was full of busy vykkers, chatting away on video fones. Sligs hustled here and there, carrying papers that were likely far too important for mudokons to be trusted to carry. They were likely just finishing up some quick business before they had to move along to zulag nine to hide.
But now they were all standing and looking at me. Some were whining.
“What the hell?”
“Shouldn’t you be in your office?”
“What in the name of Odd …”
And that was it. I quickly popped over to my mudokon body. This caused an uproar. Vykkers were suddenly trying to make different fone calls to try and tell Icarus that hey, there’s a mudokon that can turn into a glukkon in here, we’re gonna shoot him, etc., etc.
I didn’t give them the time. The shrykull power I had earned in the detention room suddenly ravaged me, and after a minute, I fell to the floor, transformation over, and room cleared of vykkers and sligs.
My joints ached everywhere. My muscles were sore. Too much transformation. Too much strain. Too much to do, too little time.
But I had to keep moving. I whistled at the mudokons, who had been making koffee for the busy vykkers, and set them free. Chanting made my shoulders and back ache even more, but … no complaining.
Now unarmed, I moved on into the next sub zulag, marketing. Where all the television commercials were pitched and even recorded.
It was empty. Only the mudokons were here, relaxing with no one to watch them.
“All o’ ya!” I whistled. “Follow me.”
They whistled in assent, and came with me into shipping. This was a large room, second largest in the factory (the largest was the giant indoor area where the “stockyards” zulags were). Crates everywhere. A large loading bay in the center, big enough to hold fifty crates. Directly above it was a round door in the ceiling, which was opened by remote from an overhead slig station. It was currently closed. There was heavy machinery, used to load the huge crates onto the loading bay platform. From here, they would be beamed up into Vykker’s Labs, but, seeing as how Abe and Munch had so recently destroyed it, the glukkons were likely planning on remodeling this room to accommodate mugs, and possibly blimps.
It was empty. Three mudokons were napping while the other two played catch with a piece of a bone.
I got them to follow me as well. This was really quite unnerving
[VISION]
zulag five is working busily. when the power goes out, several sligs begin to panic. soon the message about the poison gas release and the retreat to zulag nine comes on. when the message ends, all sligs in the sub zulags for marketing, shipping, and receiving quickly move out and into zulag nine.
[/VISION]
Aha. Fine.
I led the mudokons into the receiving department, which was considerably smaller. The only things we received were stock animals, dropped in from - you guessed it - Vykker’s Labs.
I gathered the five relaxing mudokons in here, and had fifteen with me. More than enough for another shrykull morph.
I chanted to free them, and when they were through, the surge of energy from the shrykull morph rejuvenated me, and my pains were almost completely silenced.
Now. Accounting. Then I would have to get out and to the stockyards.

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  #129  
11-09-2005, 02:02 AM
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Half his time gone and not half the mudokons saved! He needs to hurry up! com on Dante! Come of Dave!
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  #130  
11-09-2005, 03:42 AM
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Yea no kidding, I'm realy wondering how you're gonna do this! Then again, Dante is not perfect, so maybe he won't save them all in time afterall.
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  #131  
11-17-2005, 06:44 PM
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Sorry it took so long. I simply haven't been in the mood. Kudos to you if you know who the mystery creatures are. Even though it's obvious

Chapter 78

31:00
I walked into accounting and, for a minute, was at a loss for words.
Before me were three tall creatures with brownish skin, four arms, and one leg with, apparently, two feet on it. Their faces were hourglass shaped, and long catfish like whiskers hung down from either side of their mouths. They each wore a red cape, clasped in the front, where it looked like a tie, and short black single-leg pants. They leaned over a table littered with papers, and they all scribbled frantically with all four hands.
They must have been the accountants. Whatever. No time to ponder this. I was about to unleash the Shrykull when the three looked up simultaneously and lunged at me.
I was taken by surprise, having forgotten I was still in my mudokon body. They pinned me against the wall.
“Wassa you doin heeya?” one said.
My arms were against the wall. I couldn’t bring them together to chant out the Shrykull!
One of the accountants went back to the table and opened a briefcase. He pulled out a long-barreled gun and pointed it at my head. “Yousa not da terroris Aybuh, isya?”
What the hell? That accent was driving me nuts. “No! I’m not Abe! I … I work here!”
The accountants looked at each other, then at the mudokons in the room. They were busy moving papers to and from filing cabinets. There were clearly five mudokons there. So I was obviously lying.
“Yousa lying. Isa think Isa gonna take yousa to da big boss de factr’y. Isa think thassa goooood idea, ya?”
The other accountants laughed. They let go of my arms - I assume so that they could grab my sides and pick me up - but I didn’t give them the chance. I brought my hands together and transformed. I unleashed blue death … and fell onto my knees as a mudokon again.
The others dropped their papers and rushed over. Whistles pierced my ears.
I picked up on one. “Dante? Is that you?”
I nodded, out of breath.
“Here, take the rest of my SoBe. You need it more than I do.”
I reached up and grasped at the half-full bottle, and, after almost spilling it, managed to take it to my mouth. I downed it in three swallows.
Ah! Energy! I felt completely refreshed. Now to hurry up.
I thanked the mudokon who had given me the SoBe, then began to chant. The mudokons leapt to freedom.
---
25:00
A glukkon once again, I stepped off of the ball car and into zulag two. An announcement clicked on as I did.
“Attention all sligs! If you are still at your posts, you are now to report immediately to zulag nine. Repeat: Report directly to zulag nine!”
And a quiet warning alarm began to buzz somewhere. Good. If this went well, there would be no more trouble for me in finding the rest of the mudokons.
“Further! Any glukkons not already in Zulag nine should hurry and finish any business they have and report to zulag nine immediately! Repeat ….”
Okay.
The sligs in this zulag were packing up and moving out. I watched as they hurried. Several gave me brief glances, but didn’t stop me.
Sligs gone. I morphed back to mudokon form and whistled sharply. Twenty five mudokons turned their heads and looked at me. I waved enthusiastically, urging them to hurry. I quickly chanted and let them all stream through.
Shrykull power renewed!
Now … I heard a whimper below me. I winced, knowing I was wasting time, but …
I leaned over and looked into the pit. A sik looked up at me. It was small and round, and stood on a single leg. It peered up at me from a single beedy eye. It was plump and pink and fleshy … typical sik. Looked almost like the thudslugs we saw flying around from time to time, only a lot bigger.
I climbed into the pit and raised my hand. This was a trick I had learned years ago: sikz would line up in single file ahead of you if you raised a hand. They did so, and I began to pick them up and toss them out of the pit.
I hurried and cleared these three sik pits, and hurried to get the burrs out. The burrs, furry creatures like fuzzles with legs and no eyes, were not as docile. They weren’t vicious enough to kill me, but whatever. And they wouldn’t eat the other stock animals I’d freed.
Okay. Time is running out. I moved across the yard and into zulag three.


Last edited by Dave; 11-19-2005 at 06:03 AM..
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  #132  
11-17-2005, 11:20 PM
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What were those creatures? O.o I couldn't figure it out! O.o
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  #133  
11-17-2005, 11:33 PM
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Seemed like those things from Tatooine from Star Wars? I can't remember what they're called...

Dugs! Like Sebulba in episode 1.
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  #134  
11-19-2005, 06:08 AM
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No. It's a chronicler, one of Oddworld's many unseen characters.

New chapter in a day or so.
And by the way, the accents were inspired by Jarjar Binks. I looked at the chronicler and thought - yes. Jarjar.


Last edited by Dave; 11-24-2005 at 08:07 PM..
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  #135  
11-19-2005, 08:02 AM
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Oh... cool... It does look a little like sebulba. It looks very cool, very Odd, I guess they use that staff as a crutch or something.
Ah well, that's cool too, can't wait for more, etc etc.
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Last edited by Splat; 11-19-2005 at 08:13 AM..
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  #136  
11-23-2005, 05:43 PM
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Yeah, I lied. This chapter is totally not "in a day or so." It's a short one. Sorry.

Chapter 79

19:00
I reached zulag three in short order. On my way there I turned to investigate a noise I heard. It was the sikz and burrs I had released. They were following me. Okay.
There were no sligs in zulag three, either. This whole thing was getting ridiculously easy. Maybe I’d make the time limit, after all.
I whistled at the other mudokons and summoned them to me. “Can you guys clear out these jyggs and meeps? I feel bad leaving them here.”
They looked around at each other. One whistled, “Where are they gonna go? There’s no way outside.”
I thought … and decided what the hell. “I’ll take care of them.” And I turned to the animals and raised my hand again. The animals were instantly attentive - the sikz more so than the burrs - and I pointed straight down at the floor. That meant Stay.
The animals, of course, did not respond, but when I went to get the jyggs and meeps out, they didn’t follow me.
I took a deep breath and climbed into the jygg pit. Jyggs are slig sized animals with sleek, brown fur and long, pointed snouts. They have thick tails, beady black eyes, and three rows of very pointy and very sharp teeth. And of course, they were easily provoked.
Another mudokon climbed in to help me. I nodded at him and pointed at the nearest jygg. We tiptoed over to it and began to pet it. It shuddered, and relaxed. The other mudokon picked it up and carried it over and placed it on the ledge above the pit. It ambled over and joined the other animals.

17:00
With the twenty six of us at work, all the meeps and jyggs were quickly taken out and placed with the burrs and sikz. Good.
I turned to the mudokons. “Okay, get ready.” I began to chant … and the mudokons took turns picking up the animals and tossing them through the portal I created.
Once all the animals were through, the mudokons jumped to freedom.
---
15:00
Back to my station: zulag four. I expected to run in, free the muds and the friets (never mind the slogs), and haul ass outta there.
But … no.
Three sligs are still here, trying to “subdue” the mudokons.
[VISION]
sligs deciding they want to make some more test meat to try and suck up to the boss. sligs choosing the mudokons in zulag four as meat.
[/VISION]
No. Not cool.
Forgetting about my charged shrykull power in my fury … I rushed forward to take on the sligs hand to hand.

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  #137  
11-24-2005, 05:23 AM
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Uhoh! There he goes. He's gonna get caught now! :P
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  #138  
11-24-2005, 11:25 AM
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Oh... pants.
Dante really needs to learn some self control. Still the only complaint i have about this story is that it will be ending soon.
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  #139  
11-24-2005, 11:27 AM
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I'm actualy looking forward to the ending!
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  #140  
11-24-2005, 07:58 PM
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The end doth draw nigh.
I'm tired.
I'll write later.

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  #141  
11-28-2005, 06:55 PM
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I'm really REALLY sorry that I haven't been on these forums for so long! I've just been lurking in and out lately, so you can expect me to pop up at the least expected time. Anyway, I read a few of the chapters that I missed and I really liked them. I can feel the whole thing building up and getting toward the climax, so I can tell the ending is going to be good!

:
Seemed like those things from Tatooine from Star Wars? I can't remember what they're called...

Dugs! Like Sebulba in episode 1.
You know, that's exactly what I thought about those creatures, too!
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  #142  
12-03-2005, 01:59 AM
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^^Me sorry too, I've been that busy. But great chapters Dave, this newest one, yeah it's short, but it's a good cliffhanger (Finally I don't miss one). Write more, please?
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  #143  
12-05-2005, 04:30 PM
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Sorry, it's been a while since I last updated. But here. Have a bite sized chapter.

Chapter 80

13:00
The sligs didn’t hear me coming. I came up behind the nearest slig and launched a fist into the back of his head. The slig went down into the dirt, dazed.
The other sligs turned to me abruptly. One looked a little surprised, but the other one clearly had his wits about him. He began to swing his gun as he turned. Luckily I saw this and stepped to the side to avoid it, and, as I did so, I swung my leg down under the third slig’s pants, knocking him over.
I turned back to the gun-swinging slig, and caught the gun butt in my face as he swung it back. After everything I had been through, it wasn’t enough to knock me out, only enough to stall me for a second. I dropped to my hands and knees and rolled over to the slig I tripped, who was struggling to stand. I groped at him and … bingo! The catch on his pants came undone, and the slig was ejected from the machine. The other mudokons hurried over and began kicking at it, laughing, and keeping it away from its weapon.
Its weapon! I reached for it and raised it at the standing slig, who was also raising his gun.
I was faster.
He was knocked back and out of his pants. One slig disposed of. But the first slig, the one I had punched, was quickly coming around. His pants were trying to right themselves. I didn’t give him a chance - boom.
By now the last slig had been beaten to death by the other mudokons … my old “co-workers.”
At the commotion, the other mudokons in the area had turned to see my spectacle. Cheers and applause arose.
Nod, Flex, Adonis, and Starch, along with a mudokon I didn’t recognize (my replacement, no doubt), surrounded me, and whistled questions shrilled into my ears.
“We heard you’d been shot trying to escape!”
“What’s it like on the outside?”
“How did you learn to fight like that?”
“Are you going to get us out of here?”
“Cool earrings!”
“Check out those tattoos on his hands!”
I hushed them all, then whistled at the surrounding crowd to gather round. After a brief consideration, I decided that the friets would have to come too. “I need you guys to go and take the friets out of their pits. Hurry!”
We all hurried and lifted the friets out. Small and heavy, friets are leather-skinned blobs with floppy ears and two large eyes.
It was done. Without a sign, I began chanting, and a portal tore open. Several muds tossed the friets through, then everyone began to leap out.
Cutting it close now. The alarm that had been going off for the past fifteen minutes or so stepped up a notch as I happened to look at a clock. 09:57, it read.
I hurried as fast as I could to the nearest lift. The only lifts in the factory went between mudokon living quarters and the three stockyards areas.
I reached the lift and operated it, getting very anxious.

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  #144  
12-06-2005, 01:39 AM
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Almost there! Lets hope he rememebers to keep his wits up from now on. Can he really clear out 2 zulags and escape in under 10 minutes? We say no, chapter one of Dante's Oddysee would also say no. I say, write more!!!
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  #145  
12-06-2005, 03:24 AM
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Maybe he will get caught just as the final mud is free or something. But would Dave realy make the ending that Cliche? Let's hope not . MORE! MORE!
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  #146  
12-06-2005, 08:16 AM
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He won't make it that cliche.

Honest question: Do you guys really think this won't have a happy ending? Do you think this is the kind of story where the hero, even if he comes out on top, shouldn't be perfect? Because even though I already know how this ends and what happens for the rest of the story, I might still change it.
I plan to post the final chapter on my birthday ... it's soon.

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  #147  
12-06-2005, 08:40 AM
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Any story with a perfect hero is stupid IMO. So... yes.
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  #148  
12-06-2005, 09:18 AM
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I too hate Mary Sues. I don't want Dante to die (remember our idea Dave?) but I'd like it to have a more Oddworld style ending rather than a happy sunshiney ending. Good chapter, if short. In a way I look forward to the last chapter, but in another, I dont want this to end. Write a third one Dave! Perhaps you could have him travel around the factories, if he survives this fic?
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  #149  
12-06-2005, 09:48 AM
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I can see the happy ending happening, but up till a while ago I couldn't see how. Anyway, it's always makes it more interesting if you try and keep a possiblity, however unlikely, that the ending won't be happy. It's still shocking if it isn't and it removes the cliche if it is.

Anyway, however it ends, I don't doubt that it will be great!

And in the words of our favourite, friendly, Uncle Aslik, "Now whadda ya wait'n for? GET BACK TO WORK!"
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  #150  
12-06-2005, 01:15 PM
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Remember the prologue? That alone should be enough to have you shaking in your boots. Look at the position he's in! It can go either way.
And Havoc, he isn't perfect. We've seen Dante at his crawling, crying, suicidal worst. And the fact that we know he will be captured says he isn't perfect. So nyah.
I'll put up the next chapter tomorrow.

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