Dante's Oddysee

[Dave]

Hey hey, it's Saturday!
And you know what that means, dontcha?
Why, its everybody's favorite Mudokon, Dante!
Let's see what that rascal gets himself into today!

Chapter 20
Okay, so I was standing around here, looking really foolish and out of place in a slig’s camp. I didn’t really want to know what they were doing all the way out here, but I figured I would probably end up finding it out, anyways.
I quickly looked around, taking in my surroundings. There were lots of pointed tents all out and about in what seemed to be a complete lack of a pattern. The tents looked to be made out of some kind of animal skin—probably paramite, perhaps scrab. A few campfires burned here and there, tended by sligs (which happened to be the only sligs in sight). They had meat roasting on sticks over the fire, and the smells that wafted my way were heavenly.
While I was busy admiring the culinary art of the sligs, I nearly didn’t notice that there were about seven slogs inching towards me, growling.
It was about then that I realized that this slig camp was from Tastee Treets, and it was out here to find me.
Alright.
I turned and ran. The slogs gave chase.
Friends, I wish that there was more to it than this, that I could make the story more dynamic. But, alas, it was as simple as I ran, they chased. At some point, I believe a slig noticed that I was loose, and signaled to his companions.
I was running when an idea
[VISION]
A lanky blue mudokon was darting along a dim, narrow hall in a large, metal room. Several slogs were on his trail. As he tore pat a sleeping slig, it stumbled to its “feet” and shouted “Freeze!” before giving chase. Eventually, the mudokon sees that there is an outcropping overhead, and he jumps for it, and pulls himself up and out of harms way. The slog leaps after him, but can’t reach. The slig isn’t quite sure what happened, or where the mudokon was. Meanwhile, the mudokon laughed to himself, turned, and walked away.
[/VISION]
suddenly occurred to me. I had to find a ledge or something that I could climb up on that the slog couldn’t climb and where the slig couldn’t shoot at me. Lucky for me that a slig can’t shoot and run at the same time.
I kept moving, keeping my eyes open for any possible escape routes. I passed a few ledges, but they looked crumbly and would probably be unreliable if I tried to climb them. But my patience was rewarded, and I saw a little indent in the side of the sloping edge of the valley. The only question was whether or not I could jump that high.
Well, it was do or die.
I ran for it, and when I was about three feet away I leapt up and raised my arms my momentum carried me forward and I was doing it by Odd I would make it and my fingers clawed into the rocks overhead and I slammed face-first into the wall. I hung there, stunned for a few seconds. The sound of slogs growling and barking got me moving, and I struggled to pull myself up and into the little crevice. I had made it out with literally inches behind my heels and the nearest slog’s muzzle. I could feel it breathing on my feet, eager to tear the flesh out of my legs.
I shuddered and tried not to picture that (and failed).
On my feet now, I took a closer look at my little sanctuary. It was a good five feet wide and seven feet high, and it wasn’t just a little indent in the wall.
It was a cave.
About now the (wheezing and out of breath) slig caught up, and started shooting. Naturally, I retreated into the depths of the cave, and was thankful to be out of the range of his gunfire.
Okay, so I had to think. What could I do to get out of here alive? I mean, I couldn’t very well possess that slig, since Orion never bothered to teach me how to do it. But if I decided that a paramite or scrab should come out of the cave, I would have been shot, anyways.
So, let’s go spelunking, eh?
I made my way through the dank cavern, keeping a hand on the wall all along. At least that way I wouldn’t double back, in case I was in a maze or something.
The only light in the cave came from behind me, at the entrance. And after about four minutes of walking, it was starting to fade. I got to a point where I was hardly able to see the hand in my face if I was looking for it. I was thinking about asking Patch for a paramite morph when I realized that I hadn’t even gotten to know the mudokon that had helped me with the scrab power.
I suddenly and completely forgot everything else I was doing, sat down, and thought, ‹Hey, where’s that mudokon that saved my life in the scrab fight?›
There was a brief silence, in which I felt as though someone was utterly confused by what I had said, and then I heard that familiar, high-pitched voice in my head. ‹Is that Mister Dante? Am I going crazy? Maybe he’s haunting me in my head!›
It was obvious he was thinking to himself, and I felt relieved. Maybe he wasn’t going to hold it against me for forgetting about him after all.
‹Yes, it’s me,› I told him, ‹and I’m sorry for not getting in touch sooner. It sort of slipped my mind, what with turning into a scrab and all.›
He was astounded, and suddenly wanted to know about everything, so I retold my tale. He listened (or so it seemed; I just had this feeling in my gut) with fierce intensity, paying no attention to anyone around him. It was like telling a story to a little kid, I would reflect much, much later.
At last, I ended my story, and managed to squeeze a name out of him. He said his name was Nine, and he was thrilled to be able to say that he helped out Mister Dante and helped save his life, never mind that he had caught a cold from his brief moment in the rainstorm. I was starting to like this guy. He might not have been very bright, but he was shaping up to be a good friend. At least Patch hadn’t sent some jerk through.
At last I remembered that I had exploring to do, and said with real regret that I had to get going, and Nine more than sympathized; he said he was anxious to hear more stories about what kinds of adventures I had. We said our good-bys and good lucks, and I stood again and moved on down the hall.

About ten feet down I saw a torch. I was unimportantly sticking out of the rock wall, lighting the trail, and I knew that it meant something was living back here. Something at least quasi-intelligent.
Not expecting any sligs to have gotten up here—they can’t climb in those ridiculous Pants, of course—I continued, expecting to find some mudokon refugees camping out, or trying to plan a raid against the slig camp.
I stepped into a chamber that seemed to be special. I mean, it could’ve been the place where all life on Oddworld originated, for all I knew right then, because there were only a few things I saw then that were important.
There were a dozen sligs standing around when I walked in. They were all fully armed and looking pretty bored. When they heard me walk in, they turned and raised their weapons.
I looked around and was terrified. It seemed that my brain couldn’t decide on whether to run, scream, fight, or cry. But finally it made a decision.
Making a mental note to clean my loincloth later (if I lived), I raised my hands into the air, in a gesture of surrender.

[Esus]

*akknowledges story*
its still great.

[Dave]

Heh heh.
Thanks. I'll try to have a chapter tonight.

[Dave]

Sorry I'm late.

Here's your chapter. It comes out to $21.50.

Chapter 21
Okay. So there I was, facing certain death. The sligs had me outnumbered and surrounded, not to mention they had guns pointed directly at my head. I didn’t know how in the world they had gotten up here, but I supposed that I would in now way find out. Hell, I’d be lucky to get a word in.
Then, one slig seemed to breathe a sigh of relief. He lowered his gun. By now I was shaking so badly that I didn’t realize this as some kind of good sign. Instead, I fell to my knees and started to babble and beg for mercy. I can remember snippets of what I said, but I don’t think any of it would be particularly … constructive. It detracts, you might say, from the eloquence I try to keep in my story.
But the point is, the sligs were no longer pointing guns at me. In fact, they were making welcoming gestures, as if I were some expected guest making a long overdue appearance at a gathering.
The sligs all gathered around me, as if they were little kids expecting a story. One slig, a particularly wiry one, at that, stepped forward, and put out his hand. I cringed away, on instinct, but when no blow came, I looked up.
“Hi!” He said simply. “Boy, are we glad to see you!”
I was more confused than ever. But they were sligs, and my inner slave was brought back to the surface.
“Before I show you around, I must apologize,” began the slig, who helped me stand up and put an arm around my shoulder to steady me. “Our welcome was most inhospitable. We have our guns constantly on the ready in case a slig from the enemy camp manages to find his way here.”
My head was swimming. “Enemy camp? You mean those tents outside?”
The slig nodded. It just occurred to me that this slig, nor any of the others, were wearing masks. I hadn’t ever seen a slig without a mask on, so I didn’t know what to expect, but it wasn’t all that ugly. “Yes. We’ve been trying to think up a way to destroy their camp, as they have invaded our sanctum and driven us here. The few of us they didn’t squash first, that is.” He bowed his head, obviously remembering a long lost companion.
“But where are my manners!” he shouted suddenly, brightening up. “I haven’t introduced myself! I’m Benedict, and I am the Top Slig in this party.”
He went on to explain that they were sligs who managed to escape from their slig barracks at a young age, and therefore they were allowed to grow up into their own peaceful nature. The mechanical pants and guns they used were pilfered from the slig camp down below; they all agreed it made moving easier, and the guns made fine weapons. However, they had (thankfully, I thought) never had their nurturing nature beaten from them, and could hardly bring themselves to fight intruders. The sligs that came in were careless about any stealth they may have been expected to have, and among all sligs in the area, it was common knowledge that a mudokon renegade known as Dan T. was on the loose.
And these guys knew that I was that mudokon. Even with the name wrong. They knew of my escape from Tastee Treets, but nothing more.
“Wait a minute,” I said. This made no sense! “There were sligs who saw me shot and killed! My body was missing an arm, and it sank to the bottom of the river outside of Tastee Treets.”
Benedict sighed. “The sligs sent to capture you never made it back to the glukkon offices. It was assumed you killed them, and then got away. They were given your location by a small tribe of mudokons that you had encountered soon after your escape. From what I hear, a mud by the name of Ryan was tortured into divulging the information.” Benedict said the word tortured with a definite tinge of anger, and I knew instantly that I could trust his word.
But had I met a mudokon named Ryan? I didn’t think so. I’d figure it out later. For now, though …
“Okay then, Benedict,” I started, “what are you so excited to see me for?”
Benedict’s eyes shone, and he spoke in a hurried way, as if I would interrupt him or call him crazy for making such a proposition.
“We are going to sneak out to the top of the valley and knock as many boulders as possible down the side to crush the tents and kill the invaders!”
I took three seconds to think
[VISION]
I was sitting in Orion’s hut, listening to him speak.
“Your fourth trial will be in Theaw. Your physical strength will be key here, as boulders fill the land, slowing your progress.”
[VISION]
of a response when I decided I would help.
“I know for a fact that there are enough boulders relatively nearby. But I have a small question to ask of you ….”
Benedict, possibly afraid I would decline to help if he refused to answer, was suddenly attentive. “Go on.”
I reached up and scratched the back of my head, just under the base of my feathers. “Are there any … peculiar totem poles around here? I was hoping to find one for my quest, and—”
Benedict looked suddenly relieved. “Oh, sure! We have two of them, in fact! Come down back, I’ll show you!”
I thanked him and followed Benedict down a corridor in the back of the cavern that I hadn’t noticed sooner, most likely because it was concealed by the flickering shadows caused by the torchlight.
As we walked, I tried to remember if I ever met a mudokon named Ryan. I mean, the muds weren’t from Oblim, because Patch and Nine would’ve both sent me some kind of message. So, it was Rotag. But, who did I know from—
ORION!

[Dave]

Chapter 22
This wasn’t good at all. Now, not only did I have brothers to save in the factory, but I have a village to liberate on the way back! I could only hope Orion was okay.
But right now I had another duty to fulfill: I had promised my help to these sligs. Benedict led me through the dark and into a small chamber. In it, there were two scraggly-looking totem poles. They looked as if they had been hurriedly yanked out of their original posts and replanted here. In any case, they were in rough shape, but I knew that they were genuine. Call it a hunch.
One totem had the unmistakable mug of a slog carved up and down it. There was even drool coming over the lips of the mouths. The second totem was simpler: it bore a remarkable resemblance to a slig riding the back of a meech. His head was to the sky, and the meech was reared back onto its hind legs. It was simply astounding.
Benedict was observing my wonder with delight. “Yes, we found these out in the village. When the invading sligs attacked, we had to preserve their beauty. They were obviously crafted by a wise and wonderful race.”
I only half heard him. I was removing my earring and moving up to the totems. Benedict didn’t seem to notice what I was doing. I approached the slog pole first, and placed the earring carefully into the mouth of the mouth at eye level.
For a second, I could swear the mouth was about to slam down on my wrist, removing my hand and swallowing the earring. But that turned out to just be the flickering light again. About now, Benedict had come up behind me, and asked what I was doing.
So, I told him. It still hadn’t occurred to me that he could be a spy, and I wouldn’t put it past the sligs to do something like this.
“I use this earring to transform into animals, and it helps me navigate through tough situations.” I said it as though it was no big deal, but Benedict was astounded. He obviously didn’t believe me.
And to confirm my suspicions: “I don’t believe it.”
I shrugged. “Hold on a sec, okay?”
I called up Patch and asked for the paramite morph. He happily obliged, and I began to chant. It was the second time I had done it, and expected to go through the entire physical switch. Instead, I felt my body … deflate. It was like I was a balloon slowly emptying of air. And with no warning—poof! I was a paramite.
Benedict watched this all with dumb surprise. I could no longer determine his expression, but I could pick up on the vibes he was giving off. Kind of how some animals can smell fear. He was definitely and completely surprised.
I figured I had proven it, and popped back over to my mudokon body.
Benedict was speechless. I grinned.
“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to get some help.” I turned back to the totem.
‹Patch, it’s me again. Can you do me a favor?›
Silence. I think Patch may have been eating lunch or something; that’s the feeling I got, anyway. Then: ‹Sure, Dante. What’s up?›
‹I need you to send me two guys for the Flash power. I’m getting a slog and a slig morph.›
I sensed Patch coughing on something, and then heard him say, ‹Okay, Dante, sure. That’s a bit … odd. Slog and slig morphs? I mean, yeah, Haste and Branch, but … What good will they do?›
I did a mental eye-roll (or at least I made it clear that I was annoyed by Patch’s ignorant question). ‹Dude, in the factory, don’t you think it would be sweet if I could sneak around and get information?›
Realization crept into Patch’s mind. ‹Oh, yeah. Gimme minute, okay?›
I thanked him and went to the slig totem. It struck me again how beautifully crafted it was. I thought it was amazing how a creature I had grown to associate with hate, anger, and malice could be made to look so pure. I reached up and stuck the earring into the sligs outstretched hand. The dull flash came again, and I again thought that the totem was moving. The hand looked like it was coming forward to grab my face. But the fear passed, and I was calm again.
Benedict found his voice. “That’s … amazing. Really.”
About then, I heard a quiet voice singing, and the flutter of wings. I turned to my left, and saw that same tear in the air. Two mudokons from the village of Oblim came hopping through. One was really tall, and had bluish-white skin and drooping green feathers. The other was shorter, and a bit on the chubby side. His skin was a greenish brown, and his feathers were a dark red.
“Hello!” I said.
“Hello!”
“Hi!”
The two muds looked around, and when they saw Benedict, they began to freak out. They were about to turn and jump back through when I spoke. “Relax! He’s cool.”
The two muds stopped, and I continued. “Well, guys, I’m Dante. You guys wanna introduce yourselves?”
They realized I was that Dante, and suddenly they forgot all about Benedict.
“I’m Aaron!” said the mud with the green feathers.
“And I’m Altus!” was red-head’s introduction.
In tandem: “And we’re …”
The two of them struck a ridiculous pose. Aaron stuck his fists into the air, and did a semi-split. Altus kneeled on his right knee, and pumped his fist downward.
“… The Terrible Twosome!”
I groaned inwardly. Of all the guys Patch could get, I get these clowns.
Ignoring their cheering and whooping, I continued. “I need each of you to reach out and touch one of these totems. It may sting, but it’s gonna be fine.”
The two muds shouted in joy, turned, and froze. They hadn’t noticed the totem poles yet. They were as struck by their detail as I had been.
“What, uh, what do they do?” Aaron asked, a little uneasily.
“When you’ve touched the poles, we will be able to communicate telepathically. And, if I ask for it, you need to give me the power to morph into either a slog or a slig, depending on which pole you touch. Get it?”
Aaron and Altus got it. They each grabbed a pole—Aaron the slog, Altus the slig—and they cried out in pain. It must’ve been brief, because they were soon hooting and hollering again. Teenagers at a party, it sounded like.
Oh, jeez.


Ha! No witty commentary! You deserve no witty comentary!

[Dave]

It's the Son of the Return of the Revenge of the Spawn of Dante's Oddysee!
This time ...
... It's peronal.

Chapter 23

So I sent Aaron and Altus back through the gate, and turned my attention back to Benedict.
“Alright, dude, I have a plan. We’re going to get your settlement back, and here’s how … ready?”
Benedict nodded. He couldn’t verbalize anymore, after seeing that. It occurred to me that sligs don’t really know anything about mudokon powers …
I cut to the chase and explained my plan to Benedict. While he relayed the plan to the others, I made a call to Altus. Then I began to transform.
My back narrowed, and my torso shortened. My arms became scraggly and weak. Even my fingers narrowed, and a fourth finger sprouted out of the side of my palm. About then my legs gave out, and I fell onto my face.
This was when Benedict and several other sligs walked back in to the chamber. I think they screamed, but I didn’t spend any more attention on them. I was transforming still, and had to focus.
My legs were gone now, and my upper lip was … melting or something. It was almost like the paramite transformation; fingers were growing out of my mouth. My jaw kinda … disappeared, or something. It just stopped being there; apparently sligs made all their sounds with their mouth-fingers.
My eyes stretched out, and my vision blurred for a moment, and then I was seeing not only in front of me, but to the sides and almost behind me, too. It’s weird to explain, and hard to imagine unless you’ve seen that way before.
My skin suddenly burnt and wrinkled, and got brown and charred. I was officially a slig. My mind suddenly filled up with the natural instincts of the common, free slig. I felt nurturing, careful, and very weary. I was filed with the urge to carry rocks around and build a shelter. But, since I had a mission to accomplish, my mudokon mind had to overpower. And it was pretty easy.
I noticed abruptly that Benedict was indeed screaming, and I think he was coming at me with a club or something.
“Hold it!” I shouted in my new, gruff slig voice. I instantly decided it rocked, and I would have to use it as much as possible. “It’s cool, I’m Dante! The mudokon!”
Benedict stopped short. “Uh … Dante? As in the mudokon that I just left two minutes ago?”
“YES!” I shouted. “Now I suggest we get this plan rolling.”
Benedict cleared his throat, and nodded. He went and got me a slig mask, as was planned. He helped me put it on, and I thanked him, and took off.
I crawled out of the room and back up the tunnel to the cave entrance. I tried to listen for any slig pants. And, even though the mask covered up a lot of sounds, and accounting for the slig’s already poor hearing, I heard no whirring pants.
I carefully crawled down from the ledge, grasping onto loose rocks and gravel. That was my first mistake: grabbing loose rocks left me slipping down the slope.
But, it did attract some attention. A slig was on duty about twenty feet away. He heard me with no trouble (his mask looked very cool, and it was a lot better than mine, so I felt a little jealous). He turned and raised his gun. “Freeze!” he shouted, but then he saw it was a pants-free slig lying around. He shook his head in disgust and lowered his weapon.
Time to roll.
“Hi. I was trying to climb up there and spy on the refugees, but I slipped.”
He strolled over to me, and smacked me across the face. “Buddy, I don’t know who you think you are, but if you think that …” Realization crept across his face, and he smacked the side of his head (the equivalent of a mudokon slapping his forehead when he realizes something obvious that he had overlooked earlier). “Why didn’t anyone think of that? If we had some of us climb up that shelf without pants … and then … Come on, buster. We gotta go see Cosmo.”
I had no idea who Cosmo was, but I had to play along if I didn’t want to raise suspicion. “Sounds like a plan, Stan, but—”
“It’s Rubb, buster.”
“Right, sorry, Rubb. But, what I was saying was can you get me some pants? And maybe a gun?”
Rubb nodded and patted me on the shoulder. “No sweat, buster. Come on.”
He led me towards the camp, but we had to be sneaky; no one would like to see me.
“You new around here, buster?” Calling me Buster was getting annoying, but I shouldn’t argue … ugh. “I’ve been here since the camp settled. You come in with last weeks recruits?”
I nodded, then realized he couldn’t see me from this angle, and then spoke. “Yeah. Name’s Branch.”
Rubb chuckled. “Branch, eh? Well, let’s get you prettied up for the Boss, okay?”
I was down with that.

[T-nex]

Hey! T-nex here!!! I'm back for more reading I'm sooooooooooo sorry for not posting lately, but... well i never had the time... Please comtinue your story! I love it!! I really do.

GO DAVE! GO DAVE!

[Dave]

Hooray!
Someone took the hint!
Now that someone has answered, I will appease the masses with a new chapter before the week is over.

[T-nex]

YIIPEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!1!!11!!! CHAPTERS FOR ME ONLY ME!!

[Dave]

Sorry I'm late. I wrote it yesterday, but forgot to post it. I'm so absent-minded.

Anyhow, I'd like to formally dedicate this chapter to T-Nex.

Chapter 24
So the guy takes me back to a tent and hooks me up with some pants and a gun. My natural slig instinct was disgusted by the feel and the weight of the thing in my hands, but the feeling of wearing pants was oddly … satisfying. Empowering. In any case, I liked it.
“Hey, Rubb,” I asked, casually. This I had to know, because if I was wrong, my plan would look ridiculous. “Don’t we have any flying harnesses?”
Rubb grunted. “No. Vladimir won’t rent them out anymore. Only on-site sligs can use them.”
“Oh. That sucks.” I tried to sound genuinely disgusted, but I had trouble masking my relief.
Afterward, he led me to the Boss’s tent. Inside, a large glukkon stood over a table, reading documents and grunting audibly from behind a smoldering cigar stump.
“Hey, Boss!” Rubb announced our presence, and the old glukkon looked up. His face was worn and wrinkled, and a long scar trailed from the corner of his left eye down to the left corner of his mouth. His lower lip was almost nonexistent—he had a terrible overbite. The collar to his suit was raised annoyingly in an Elvis-like fashion (I use a reference you humans should understand). His suit was a double breasted, solid black. His blood red necktie was tucked in under the folds of the coat, covering a small portion of the otherwise exposed dirt-brown shirt underneath. I couldn’t see his shoes from the other side of the desk, but I was willing to bet that they were very fancy.
“Yes?” Cosmo asked in a somewhat charming voice (charming maybe to my slig ears, but my mudokon mind found it nerve-grating).
“Boss, this new guy thought up a clever plan for infiltrating the refugee camp.”
Cosmo’s jaw dropped … and so did his cigar. But he didn’t notice. He fixed his stare on me, and looked remarkably eager to hear the details.
“Really? What’s your name, slig?”
I croaked out, “Branch, sir.”
“Well, Branch! If this plan of yours works, there’s a promotion in store for you!”
I decided I’d better look excited, and it wasn’t too hard. I was, in reality, excited that the plan was going off with no trouble, and so it was reflected on my face.
I went through the plan as rehearsed.
“Well, sir, I figure we climb the wall without pants, and have them hoisted up to us at the cave entrance. Since we don’t have access to flying harnesses, this is a logical solution. As for the layout of the cave, I don’t know what to expect. But, if we strike all at once, there should be no trouble.”
Cosmo seemed to consider. Then … “Brilliant! Branch, you are hereby promoted to …” he faltered a moment. “Eh, what’s your rank, slig?”
I was stunned. Rank? The only slig rank I knew about was bouncer … but they didn’t carry guns. So …
“Bouncer, sir.”
Cosmo surprised me by nodding. “Very well, you are herby promoted to Slig Worker Elite!”
I sensed Rubb wincing next to me; it was obvious that I now outranked him.
“Rubb! Bring this fine Slig to the armory and get him suited up!”
Rubb grunted. “… yes, sir.”
I grinned a slig grin—the outermost tentacles on my face curled up, and the remaining tentacles drooped straight down. “Thank you, sir!”
“And gentlesligs, I will be issuing a command for the entire regiment to gather for briefing in ten minutes. Branch, I expect to see you on the podium!”
I saluted with the slig salute I had seen so many times in the factory: Left hand out, perpendicular to my torso, then pulled it up to my forehead, palm faced out.
As we walked out, I could swear I heard Cosmo mutter, “If only all sligs showed that much respect …”

Ta daa!

[T-nex]

WEEEEE!! CHAPTER FOR ME! ME HAPPY! ME WANT MORE!!!

Keep it up

[Killa_47]

How do u have timer to write all of this it is incredible.

Great storyline!


MORE MORE MORE MORE MORE

[Dave]

Hey! New Fan!
Well, seeing as how I am now officially on summer vacation, (and finals are over!) I can get back to work on this.
New chapter in the next few days.

[T-nex]

>Yes.. We are waiting for your precious and awesome chapters!!!! MORE MORE!! ME DIE WITHOUT CHAPTERTS!!! AAAAA!!

[Dave]

Let me define "a few days."
When I said a few days before, I intended for it to mean two or three days.
But it turns out that "a few days" is, in reality, fifteen days! Whaddya know?
Anywho, the long-awaited return of Dante's Oddysee!

Chapter 25

So, it was off to the armory. Bingo.
Once inside, Rubb outfitted me with all the bells and whistles. Blitzpacker, extra-industrial strength armor, infrared goggles, and the finest Pants a slig could hope to wear.
Something in my slig mind felt calm … elated. I think back now, and think that the slig in me was enjoying this power, this sense of control, this knowledge that I could take a life with such little effort.
But … not quite yet. There was a plan to consider.
So, casually, as Rubb was fastening the back of my armor, I asked him: “Do we have any grenades lying around?”
Rubb shrugged. “Well, duh. This is the armory, right? Hang on, I’ll find you a grenade launcher.”
Meanwhile, I heard the PA blare to life overhead. The whine was immense, but it soon passed, and Cosmo’s voice was broadcast across the valley.
Exactly as planned. My reinforcements knew this as the sign to prepare.
Rubb came up with a small harness. It looked like a flying slig harness, but with no propellers.
“Okay, Branch, I’ll clip this to your back, then I’ll show you how to work it.” He continued to speak as he hooked it up. “Its design is based on a slig’s flying harness, as I am sure you’ve noticed. There is a little button on your right hand to fire the grenades, which I will wire into your palm. Your left hand will have a dial that controls the distance it will be thrown.
“There is a failsafe, of course, in case you fire by accident: you’ll need to pull a lever on the harness in order for the grenades to fire when you press the trigger. The lever, you’ll notice—” he rattled a lever on my left side “—is right here.”
Rubb stood up and admired his work. Then, he attached a screen over my eyepiece.
“When the grenades are armed, this screen will activate. You’ll see crosshairs and readings to determine the point of impact. It takes some getting used to, so be careful not to blow yourself up.”
When he was done, I was a regular sized slig wearing two layers of armor, a grenade harness, carrying a Blitzpacker, and wearing blazing red eyepieces.
Pretty sweet.
But now I had to eliminate Rubb. He had seen me come out of the cave, and already suspected me a little.
But it had to look like an accident.
Rubb decided it would be okay for him to take a bigger gun for himself while I was admiring my new suit. I noticed, of course. I slowly and carefully pulled the small lever on my side, arming the grenade launcher. The screen on my eyepiece flashed on, and I saw green crosshairs in the center of my vision. A reading on the left told me how far away it was aiming. I figured Rubb was a good ten feet away. Well within range.
Rubb turned to me carrying a large gun. It was no Blitzpacker, but it was still impressive. “You ready to go onstage?” he asked.
“You bet.” Good. My nervousness wasn’t showing in my voice. “Hey, uh, Rubb, how exactly did you say I fired grenades? My mind is slippery this morning.”
Distractions. I was turning the dial to adjust my aim.
Rubb sighed. “Dude, you have to arm it by pulling the lever, and then push the button on your hand.”
“Oh, so I, like, make a fist?” Almost time.
“Yeah, but be careful. If you don’t pull the failsafe, there’s a one in twenty chance the grenade will detonate in your harness.”
Gee, if he had told me sooner, I thought. Still, it was good to know.
“Anyways, Branch, we’d better get moving.”
I nodded. “You bet.”
I flashed a thumbs up in his direction. My fingers pressed the button with liquid ease.
I heard a small pop, and watched Rubb’s slig face drop in horror.
I saw a grenade launched from over my head. It flew silently towards Rubb, who was too shocked to react. When he caught on, he turned and uttered a small cry (it may have been him calling for help).
But the grenade landed at the bottom of his pants. It exploded on impact.
Twisted metal and hunks of meat ripped away from the spot of the explosion. Rubb’s new gun clattered to my feet in a twisted, broken heap.
I laughed.
This was going to be interesting.

[mih0001]

I think Dante's Oddysee is really good

[Dave]

Well, thanks!
Today's Wednesday, so ...
I'll have a chapter out by Sunday. For real.

[WiLL the Wander]

Whoa!!! It's awesome! You got a new fan!!!

[Killa_47]

*sits anxiously in the chair and will not move until next monday*

[Smell]

you'll have to move, to go to the toilet.

[WiLL the Wander]

NO! Bring in the toilet and use it for chair.... but please no spam Killa if you spam again you will be banned forever!

[Killa_47]

i'm not spamming and i dont think dave will be happy that we r arguing in his story section.

[Dave]

HEY! NO SPAMMING IN MY THREAD!
Please, keep posts related to my story.

[WiLL the Wander]

I write this to the story thread no become a 'Toilet Chair' Thread...

[Killa_47]

HEY! NO SPAMMING IN MY THREAD!
Please, keep posts related to my story.

saw that coming.

I apologise dave

Is ur net part going to be any better than the others cause that would be hard to accomplish.

[Dave]

No big thang.
I just thought it was funny that we posted at the same time ...

i'm not spamming and i dont think dave will be happy that we r arguing in his story section.

...
But anyways.

Is ur net part going to be any better than the others cause that would be hard to accomplish.

Wow! Uhh ... I don't know. I haven't written the next chapter yet. I post the chapters within minutes of writing them.
In fact, I think I'm gonna write one now.
Be patient.

[Esus]

I havn't even read chapter 21 and I really want to.
Upstairs right now are five books I have got halfway through over the past month, and I really wanna finish reading all of them, but I just... don't.
I have resolved to at least catch up on this story tomorrow sometime. I really don't know what's got into me.

[Dave]

Don't worry, Esus. Dave forgives.
I would've had this posted earlier, but I had things come up ... like dinner and cleaning.
Blech.

Anywho, here's chapter 26, a few hours late, but still here.

Chapter 26
At this point, the other sligs back in the cave were preparing for the assault. Equipping their sturdiest pants, their slickest guns, and so on.
What they were supposed to do was sneak out of the cave when I began my speech. While I kept them captivated, the other sligs had to sneak out of the valley and up to the top, where the terrain was rocky and boulder-scattered.
I just had to trust that they wouldn’t get caught.
Now, though, I had to make the attack on Rubb look accidental. Should be easy.
As if on cue, two sligs barged into the armory, looking alarmed. Then one of them noticed the scorch mark on the ground, and cried out. He looked at me … and cried out again.
“Did you blow someone up?” he said. “What happened?”
I began stuttering and looking pathetic. “Rubb just hooked me up with a new suit, and I actually set off the grenade launcher … I didn’t know that the safety was off … and I slipped …”
The second slig looked at me … “Wait … Rubb? Oh, pfft. Whatever. To tell the truth, that guy’s had it coming for quite a while. Good work. What’s your name?”
I sighed with relief. “I’m Branch,” I started, then added: “Slig Worker Elite.”
The newcomers winced. Ha! I outranked them, too! “Well, sir, we have a meeting to attend to …”
I nodded. “Yeah. I’m speaking at it. Let’s go.”
They led me outside to the assembly area. For a brief moment I was afraid it would be around the cave … because, you know, that’d be my luck. But, not a problem. We were going the complete other way.
I was pushed toward the platform, and I unceremoniously climbed atop. Cosmo was waiting here, with two Bigbro security guards flanking him, armed to the tentacles. Well, if I was planning any funny stuff, that plan would’ve just been shot down.
I looked out at the crowd of sligs, standing at the bottom of the stage. They chattered and talked, not really paying attention to anything. They stood in rough groups, not showing any sort of organization. Typical sligs.
And … across the valley, I saw a flood of sligs pour out of the cave. Good.
So, I had to speak long enough to allow them to get out of the valley. I had always been good at talking about stuff. I should have no problem.
Except stage fright. Oh, Odd, was I terrified! I don’t think it was just that I was in front of an audience, but I think that it contributed. The big deal was that I was looking at ton of sligs who normally would’ve shot me just as soon as look at me.
No time to panic; I had to help these sligs.
Cosmo stepped up to the microphone. “Attention! Direct your attention to this slig!”
The audience suddenly snapped into professionalism. Perfect lines, left to right and front to back. Impressive. I almost lost concentration. But that would’ve been bad.
Anyways, I had an audience to captivate.
“Uh, so I can just talk, Boss?” I muttered to Cosmo.
He answered with a stiff nod. That was enough.
“Uh, okay, gentlesligs, let’s get down to business! I have taken it upon myself to do a bit of spying on the renegade sligs—”
were just reaching the base of the slope on the far side of the valley. Across the way, the
“—cave. I found that it is, thanks to my research, accessible only by climbing—”
up the slopes. They were about halfway up, and moving briskly
“—along the wall. We’ll need to remove our pants for maneuverability, so some of us will have to hoist them—”
up the slope and to the top of the valley. I guess I didn’t have to stall for very long, after all. I guess it was time for me
“—to the cave entrance. From here, we’ll march directly into the cave, and annihilate the resistance. Now, this is going to be rough work, so we have to—”
take the army to the cave. If I can get them all right around the cave, mostly inside it, then it would be easier to drop the
“—rock and roll, okay? No stragglers. No loafing. We need to get as many of you in there as possible. The spying I did proved that they have much firepower. We have to be careful not to be caught by—”
surprise on the sligs below. It was time.
“Anyways, gentlesligs, it’s time. Let’s go.”

[WiLL the Wander]

MORE! MORE! I love this story!

[Killa_47]

I'm lovin it lovin it lovin it!!!!!!!!!!!
Need more.