Saw it. 'Twas grand.
*OMFG SPOILERS*
The movie was not quite what I had expected, but it was brilliantly done regardless. I'm breaking this review into segments for easy viewing, plus my brain hurts.
Imagery: 10/10
The atmosphere was fantastic, perfectly digusting and filthy. The rustic elements were in perfect harmony with the actions that were occurring among the settings. The scene with the Janitor gave a great sense of confinement and claustrophobia as he devoured the room in red ripley. The scene with the acid-belching lying figure was great, though it seemed a bit tacked on. The fog enveloping the figure created a sense of tension and suspense as your eyes raced to make out the features of the thing as it stumbled out of the mist and came into focus. The transitional effects between the foggy dimension and the rustic dimension was ingenius, though the rustic dimension had a bit of a problem with light balance. If you weren't in a darkened theatre, I guarantee you wouldn't be able to see a thing.
Violence/vulgarity ratio: 9.5/10
What I mean is... is it in balance with what's going on? The gore was there, oh was it ever, but instead of delivering it parcelled in even doses, there were scenes of just pure gore after a long scene of nothing too interesting occurring (gore-wise). Particularly noted in the final scene in which Alessa rips the 'sinners' to shreds with her barb wire carriage (that gave me a mega boner).
As far as swearing goes, there was a fair amount, enough to seperate it an R movie from a PG-13 movie. And nudity, well, other than the breef skinning sequence (FARKING AWESOME) and the risqueness of the nurses' breast-lifting outfits, there was pretty much nothing for the fan boys to krank off to later.
Game Accuracy: 7/10
The story was definitely revamped a fair amount. Alot of scenes were taken right from the game though, and it was great to see them reenacted with actors and grade A effects.
Creatures: 10/10
I have listed these in order of appearance...
Grey Children: Fantastic and extremely disturbing in both design and characterization. The apparent innocence of a child misleads you into a short-lived false sense of security, as they lift their heads into the light and open their distorted mouths to let out their signature ear-splitting shriek. I believe the effects were a mix of actors in suits and enhancing CGI effects such as glowing eyes, skin pattern, and glowing sinders that slowly consumed them before they fell prey to the return of the foggy dimension.
The Janitor:
A disturbing being that took you by gracious surprise. The most human of the monsters (other than PH). The design was a bit simple, but he was disturbing nonetheless, and the depravity of him as a human only adds to the creepiness.
Pyramid Head (and his little pets):
I love and worship him forever. The design was sweet but I don't have to tell that to most of you. By far the most ominous and forboding villain, a monstrous figure accompanied by an endless wave of devilish little insects and of course his Great Knife (which was even too heavy for him evidently). My only wish is that we saw a bit more of him and his amazing strength (I wish I could skin people that way!). He needs his own damn movie.
Lying Figure:
Very little difference to the game version other than the mouth looks less like a vagina. Creepy and grotesque in every sense of the word. Make up effects were spot on and really submitted a great feeling of overwhelming disgust.
Nurses:
Not much different from the game. Twitchy, risque costumes, and lots of female orgasm sounds. It seemed a bit lame that they were all clustered having an orgy in the middle of a hall way instead of being evenly distributed wandering the dark halls of Brookhaven.
As far as acting goes, I don't have much to say other than it was bad with the exception of whoever played the radical Christabella bitch. Just bad. Wooden. Not good at pretending they're scared. Etc. etc. etc. No one goes to see this movie for the actors.
Cybil = huge dike.
Overall: 9/10
Pros: Great atmosphere. Great monsters. Great story. Stuff that only appeals to old-school SH fans.
Cons: Bad acting. Satisfactory CG effects. A poorly composed ending.
Just go see it. Now.
Last edited by Sekto Springs; 04-23-2006 at 07:55 AM..
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