Job Fan Fiction

[odd chick]

Hey, nice story, Kimon! I saw where you thought that Ben wasn't the right name for the character. Honestly, I think that there are three names that would suit the character and his personality, in my opinion. I don't know why, but I think that a name that begins with S would work. I don't know why, but it seems that it would suit the character. =/ The first one is Seiko, which is a Japanese name that means truth or force (trust me, I actually did a search on some names ). The other two are Shilah, which is Native American for brother (so the site said. ) and Socorro, which is a Spanish name for helper. I just figured that these names portrayed the character's personality the most. If you'd like to use something else, though, it's alright. I was just posting these to help you out a bit.

[Kimon]

Wow, Oddchick, you nailed that on the head. Shilah is a perfect name! However, I'll have to mess with it to make it sound a little more goofy (you know, Oddworldian). But that will definetly be the root of his name. Thanks.

[odd chick]

You're welcome. I can't wait to see the "Oddworldian" version of the name!

[Kimon]

I haven't thought about an "Oddworldian" name yet (and believe me, I'm working on it ), but I have come up with this facial rendition of my character. He's gona through quite a few design variations by now, but I've chosen one, and I'm gonna stick with it. Here's a quick sketch of his head. I tried to get the eyes as close to a Mudokens as possible. Enjoy.

P.S. I've edited some small parts of Chapter 4 to comply with the current version of Shilah. Just a heads up.

[General Dripikk]

Nice stroy so far, I like the drawing Kimon! How about the name...hmm, he looks like a Kekoa to me, just a name I had in mind.

[odd chick]

Awww, he looks so cute in that drawing...in a strange way! I can't wait to see the character when you're completely finished with the designing processes.
Edit: By the way, thanks for using the name I gave ya!

[Dipstikk]

I really like how you tell the story as if Job's speaking. It makes me think of the second story in Sin City almost, the one with the burly dude.

Good job with Job! Keep it up!

[Kimon]

Hey Dipstikk, I was wondering if you could help me out with something. I've been trying to illustrate Shilah, but I can't get everything to fit together with the body, it just ends up looking terribly awkward. Would it be all right if I PM'd you a description (along with some crappy images) of the basic design of Shilah so that you could put together an illustration? I'd really appreciate it. Just send me a PM if you assent and I'll reply.

[Dipstikk]

I'll see if I have time, but I'm swamped for the next two-to-three weeks. Fianls, graduation... that stuff.

Like I said, go on and send 'em, but it may take a while. I haven't even had time to draw in three days.

[Kimon]

That's okay. In about 2 weeks I'll probably figure out how to draw it anyway.

Hmmm... I'm gonna have to start working on a new chapter.

[Kimon]

Alrighty, here's the new chapter. Oddchick, I've decided to keep the name as it is. A nickname might develop over time, but that's still to be determined by my staff. Namely me.

Anyway, here it is:

Chapter 10 - The River

I woke up again with a sound night's sleep. No dreams, no visions, no nuthin'. When I got up, I was surprised to find out that the other fellas were already up! They were chowin' on some berries, and George was finishin' up his Elum's saddle. I walked over to them.

"Hey guys, what's up?"
"Nothing much, Job. Just finishin' my saddle n' stuff."
"What? I thought you finished that last night."
"Oh yeah, I did. But, um, Elum here was hungry, and he, um..."
"He ate your saddle?"

George looked at his feet. "Yeah, kinda." Apparently their relationship was sort of a one-sided thing. Oh, well, as long he could run. I started "talking" to Shilah about how he was gonna do today. He was tired, but he let me know he could make it. That dude's a good guy.

Anyway, when George finished his saddle and got in on the Elum (which took some persuading, and quite a few bruises), we headed off. The first few hors were pretty nice. We saw more of the forest, and I was getting greener by the minute. The land was changing as well. Everything started to get warmer and wetter. I guess the Vykkers were headed for some kinda tropical island or something.

Just before lunch, something amazing happened. We were heading through the forest (which now was closer to a jungle) when we reached water. A LOT of water. It was some kind of river or something. The view was awesome. We were at the top of a hill, looking down on a river valley. It was full of trees with big, long leaves, and at one end, what looked like miles away, was a huge old building. It looked kinda like a dam. Whatever it was, it was HUGE.

It was also an oasis for me and George. First the forest and now this? Rivers are great spiritual fonts that can help us Muds get in touch with nature. So we slid down the hill and started listening to the river. She said that she was the powerful and long-flowing Mongo. I asked her if she saw anything unnatural around her in the past few days. She said yes. Two days ago, she said that a huge round metal bird flew over her, and was still over her now. I looked up, and all I could see was clouds. I questioned her again. "Where is it now?" She told me that it had followed her downstream.

I was shocked for some reason. I had expected it to head in one direction. Why would it change? Did something unexpected happed, or was that part of the plan? I was so confused. I looked at George, and he had heard what I did. Instead of confusion, he looked anxious, like he wanted to be at the ship NOW, beating up those Vykkers. Maybe he really held a grudge against those punks, I don't know. But what I did know was that we were heading downstream.

I started to stand up to leave, and as soon as I got up, I was down again. Wait. What? I looked down, and all across my body were ropes with arrows attached to 'em. I looked around wildly, the others were tied up too! What was going on?!?! Who did this?!?!

As if answering my unspoken question, a figure stepped out of the trees and looked right at me. It was short and thin, and it held a bow. "We don't like tresspassers here. You're not going anywhere."

Damn. Why does this stuff always happen to me?

End of Chapter 10.

There ya go.

[General Dripikk]

That was an excellant chapter kimon, please finish.

[odd chick]

You're leaving the name as Ben? Oh, well, do as you wish, I suppose-it's your story, after all. Anyway, that was an excellent chapter as usual, Kimon. Keep your interesting story going.

[Kimon]

No, no, you misunderstand. I'm leaving Shilah as it is. I previously said I would make the name more Oddworldian, but I've decided not to. "Ben" in the last chapter is a typo. I'm gonna go fix that now.

[odd chick]

Oh, ok! Yes, I'll admit, I did misunderstand-I do that a lot of the time! Sorry about that. Anyway, like I've said, it's a great story-I can't wait to see what you come up with next.

[Kimon]

Hi guys. Sorry I haven't updates in a while. I've been super busy with school, and I feel like I'm neglecting the story. Which is bad.

So in an attempt to bump it up, I'll show you a picture of what Shilah's torso and legs look like. Enjoy the low-quality crappy sketch!

[Abe16]

Nice work Kimon, I was wondering if you were going to update.

[odd chick]

Oooh, nice work, Kimon! It looks amazing! I can't wait to see him when he's finished!

[Kimon]

Another triumphant comeback! Yay!

Chapter 11 – The Clan

I was scared. I had never been in a sit’ation like this. Some had trapped us, and we didn’t know who. I swiveled my head around to look at the other guys. They were all struggling on the ground, but Elum was gone. He musta ‘scaped.

“Hey! Hey you guys on the ground all tied up… uh, n’ stuff! Yeah! Yeah you! Look at me!”

I had to twist my neck around to see the guy. It kinda hurt, and I heard few cracks. Anyway, when I got my head around, it turned out the guy was a chick. And she had a buncha friends.

She was just standin’ there, all proud like. I almost didn’t see her at first cuz she was so dang short. But once I realized I was talking to midgets, I could see her clearly. She was short, slimy, and looked like some kinda wormy thing, and she had a chest piece and a loincloth on. Also, there was some weird spidery shaped thing on her head. It gave me the creeps.

“Hey buddy! My eyes, they’re all, like, they’re up HERE man, okayso you look at my eyes when I’m talking to you.”

All her little buddies started murmurin’. I heard snippets like “He’s gonna get it, dude.” And “Oh man, dude, they’re toast!”

I craned my neck to look up in her eyes. They were pretty n’ green. Like my skin.

“AlrightNOBODY! And I mean NOBODY! Comes in on messes up our turf, okay! Wellactually maybe like the Steef, um, er sumthin’, but NOONE ELSE! Uh… ‘kay?!”

Whoa! I could sense Shilah start up at the word Steef. He was trying to talk to me, but I couldn’t hear him.

I spoke up as best I could in my screwy position.

“We-ouch- we weren’t trying to mess up your turf, dude! We were just following this shi-”
“Hey SHUTUP! ‘K, cuz you’re like disrespectin’ me n’ stuff. So anyway, like, you’re not trying to mess with us? Er sumthin’?”

“Nope.”

“Oh, okay. That’s cool, I guess then. Alright dudes, let ‘em go.”

All her little buddies waddled over and pulled the ropes off us.

The leader then came over to us and introduced us to her little bunch o’ buds. Shilah wanted to talk, but I told him later.

“Hey, I’m Job. This is George, and this guy here is Shilah.”

“Alright duders, nice to meet, nice to meet… anyway this… is my clan, okay? We are… the GRUBBS! ‘N stuff. And we’re like, a proud nation, and you’re our new buds, aright? Cool, man. Oh yeah, and I’m Kido. I’m the leader.”

Her clan nodded.

“Yeah, she’s like, our number 1 chick, dude!”
“Rock on, Kido!”
“I luv you soooo much, Keedster!”

Man, these guys were cool. I was psyched to have new friends. Shilah felt the same way, but he was distracted cuz he still wanted to talk, but I told him, “LATER, let’s just chill for now.” Geroge was not happy. He liked the Grubbs just fine, but he was real worried about Elum. He was crying ‘n stuff. I felt real bad, and I told him we’d go lookin’ for him in the morning. He agreed halfheartedly.

After the introductions we were swept on to a celebration of some sort. There was dancin’, and apparently I’m real good at it. There was a big circle of Grubbs around me and I was just jammin’ and spinnin’ to the drumbeat… I loved it.

I was glad to have these new friends, and they were glad to have us. The day started off pretty crappy, but it ended up like a dream.

End of Chapter 11.

Alright. Now go back and read Kido’s parts like a Grubb would say ‘em. They make a lot more sense that way.

Anyway, I hope you liked it.

P.S. Thanks to Munch's Master for reminding me that I have a fan fic.

[odd chick]

Nice chapter, Kimon! I just love those Grubbs-they're so hilarious! I'm glad you put them in your story. Well, I don't really have any critique for ya because it was already a great chapter-just keep 'em coming!

[Abe16]

*raises 3 cardboard flats that all say 10 10 90* excellant work Kimon!

[Munch's Master]

Hooray! New chapter! But Iv'e forgotten a lot of the story so I'll nead to read it again before I can give my verdict. Expect the edit in 30 mins or so.
EDIT: Ah yes I remember now, boy it's been a while since I read this. Anyway, great chapter Kimon! And cool that you put the Grubbs in, that was a good chapter. I love this whole fic, funny, action packed, everything all in one! I cannot wait for the next chapter!

[Kimon]

Yay! Thanks for the responses, guys.

[T-nex]

YAY! FInally read all the chapters ^_^ lol, your story is so hilarious...

Oh, and the grubbs rox too

[Dave]

Very good work. I'm impressed!
I like the little touches, like the detail you put into the way the characters talk. The instant I realized it was a grubb speaking to Job, George, and Shilah, the little whiny grubb voice took over in my mind and it fit perfectly.
Congratulations on a story well told. I look forward to the next chapter.

[Kimon]

Thanks, Dave. I'll work on a new chapter tonight.

[odd chick]

Very good work. I'm impressed!
I like the little touches, like the detail you put into the way the characters talk. The instant I realized it was a grubb speaking to Job, George, and Shilah, the little whiny grubb voice took over in my mind and it fit perfectly.
Congratulations on a story well told. I look forward to the next chapter.

That's exactly what happened to me, too. (with the slightly croaky little grubb voice being placed into my mind.) Anyway, your story is awesome, Kimon. We can't wait to read the next part of it.

[Kimon]

Hello, one and all, and witness the return of Job. *SMILES!*

Chapter 12 – This is Bad.

We woke up next to the big, smoldering fire pit where we had the bonfire last night. The air stank like burnt wood, and it smelled real good. I looked around the Grubb camp. Apparently those little guys get up early, ‘cuz they were all buzzin’ around doin’ stuff.

George was still sleepin’, but Shilah was up, and looked as if he had been for some time. He loped on over to me. It’s hard to describe how this guy talks to me, so I’ll just tell it like we were talkin’.

“How are you, Job?”
“I’m pretty good. What’s up?”
“I need to talk to you.”

Oh yeah, that thing he was urging me to talk about yesterday. Right.

“Well, alright. What’s on your mind?”
“Romember how Kido mentioned that Steef were important here?”
“Yeah…?”
“Well, I remember the Vykkers saying that I was part Steef. This may be a chance to find out what I’m made of.”

Shilah didn’t seem to care about the fact that he was made in a big bowl. In fact, he felt more strong and spiritual than any other being I’ve ever spoken to.

“Well… okay. We’ll talk to Kido. But right now we have work to do. We’ll get to it in a few days.”

He looked pissed, but agreed anyway.

I felt bad about hurtin’ Shy, but there was nothin’ I could do. It just wasn’t the time for that. So I put that behind me and started trompin’ on over to Kido’s hut. It was a round, flat little hill of sticks n’ skins in the middle of the camp. I guess Kido didn’t really have a taste for the high life.

I peeked my head in to see what was up, and saw Kido snorin’ on her mat. I guess she didn’t like the morning as much as the other Grubbs. Just as I was about to wake her up, I heard a real loud noise, then nothing. It was real quiet for a second, and then everyone started screamin’. It was crazy.

“Holy crap! It’s not them, it can’t be them!
“Aahhh! They found us! Aaahh!”
“Run, dudes, run!!!”
“THE WOLVARKS ARE HERE!!!!”

At that word, Kido shot upright, looked at me for a split second, grabbed her bow and sprinted out the door. I followed as quick as I could, but I was real scared. My legs were like jelly!

When I opened up the tent flap, I stopped breathing. On the other side of camp, there were at least 20 dropships crashed into different Grubb homes, and there were craters EVRYWHERE. Weird, mangy yellow guys were spillin’ outta the ships, and they were shooting everything they could.

Oh Odd. What the heck was happening?

End Of Chapter 12.

I hope you liked it.

Anyway, this chapter wasn't so different from before, or what I had planned, but there are going to be some drastic changes made in terms of storytelling. The fiction will start to revolve around several characters instead of just Job, and it'll be weird for a while, but never fear, because the changes will be worth it.

The reason I haven't been writing is because there are a lot of elements of my story that I became disenchanted with, and I realized I had written myself into a corner. My bad.

So, the next few chapters might be a little bumpy and clunky, because I'm trying to get rid of the old and bring in the new. I see new possibilities for this story, and I'm going to change some things I don't like about it to fit the new things that I think will work out great.

I'll post the next chapter just as soon as I figure out how I'm gonna continue this story.

[metroixer]

Wow this is an awesome storry!Keep up the good work man.Also cal me crazy but I think I sence a certain steef coming!

[Dave]

I agree with Metro. I have a sneaking suspicion ...
Nah.
About time you updated this thing.
But yeah, writing oneself into a corner can be rough. I'm glad to see you didn't give up entirely. Good for you!