The Ninja Girlocalypse
Sandra awoke in the hallway, her head aching. She didn't know who she was, where she came from, how she knew all these things she did. Basically a Saturday night aftermath. She a crazy bitch.
She stood up, a little like a startled deer. Think David Attenborough with animals and shit. Suddenly a man walked into focus, taking her by surprise.
"Oh!" They both said simultaneously.
Suddenly, the door behind him blew off its hinges and he dived on top of her. To protect her, obviously. Sicko. Think he was looking for free perks? Maybe in your twisted world. Don't look at me I just write this shit, you read it man. God damn.
Ninjas ran into the room. Ran all over them. They were all over the place, seriously, like fuckin on the walls and shit bitch fuck me everywhere
"PUT YO MOTHER. FUCKIN. HANDS UP, BRETHREN!" One shouted like Samuel L. Jackson.
The man was still lying on top of the woman. Pay attention, this isn't your bedtime filth. That comes later. After this.
"What do you want from us?" Strained the damsel in distress, muffled under about 100lbs of pelvis.
"SILENCE" One of them said like that one clown off The Simpsons. Side Show Mel, is it? I can't remember. You know the one I mean. Well, it sounded like that dude from that one episode. We all got it? Ok good.
"We're here to take you to our leader- AWWW, YEAA!!" Another chimed in and they all started handing him money.
"Sorry, we laid a wager a few days back on who'd be the first to say that. Now you go sleepies!" Said one of those sneaky fuckers. I dunno they were too quick before they chloroformed me. I mean them. Ahem. Almost.
Anyway I guess that's chapter one.
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