I don't think I mentioned it but I ain't a virgin and by god did the first time scare me, I was more focused on making sure that I'd last for her sake but, alas, it wasn't meant to be.
After-wards I realized that if I sneak off for a crafty wank first I could last for fucking decades. And that's my advice for all the virgins out there... before sex, go for a wank, be heavy on the foreplay then stick it in.
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"I'm staunchly atheist, I simply don’t believe in God. But I'm still Catholic, of course. Catholicism has a much broader reach than just the religion. I'm technically Catholic, it's the box you have to tick on the census form: 'Don't believe in God, but I do still hate Rangers..'"
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