Live from the prestigious Molluck Memorial Hippodrome in Oddywood! It's The Oddworld Forums Awards 2009! Please put your hands, wings and tentacles together, stamp your feet, talons and tentacles on the floor and whistle loudly (or do that OOH OOH OOH thing if you can't whistle) in supportive welcome of your host for this exciting evening of backstabbing and bribery, Wired!
Gooooooood evening, good evening, good evening, good evening, good evening and welcome to all you fine ladies and gentlemen and sexless workers. It's wonderful to see you all out tonight in the current oeconomic climate. It's a testament to the industriousness of Cartelkind that we can forget about the monetary woes of people who don't matter and still manage to transport ourselves to a night of luxury entertainment and cuisine.
But in truth we have all been hard hit by recession. High unemployment rates following the kidnapping of thousands of Mudokon loyalites has led to horrendous sacrifices. Stamp Duty now means we have limited ability to freely to kick our employees. And subsidies on hanging and drawing have been quartered.
Cost cutting measures have affected every industry, including the awards ceremony industry. The price of gold is the highest it's ever been, so the statuettes given to winners of this year's awards will instead be made of velcro (and incidentally if you have any old, gold awards from previous years lying about your house, if you post them to Moolah4Gold you'll receive a note informing you of how much you've donated within 4 to 6 weeks). That said, here are this year's categories!
The Categories
Best Thread Creator
Best Blogger
Greatest Debator
Funniest Poster
Most Unintentionally Funny Poster
Most Meaningful Poster
Most Underrated Poster
Best Advice Giver
Member with the Greatest Oddworld Knowledge
Best New Comer
Most Welcome Return
Best Veteran
Dearly Missed Member
Most Liked
Most Eccentric
Most Annoying
Most Accomplished Troll
Best Couple
Most Dedicated Member
Member in Dire Need of a Life
Best Staff Member
Member Who’d Make a Good Moderator
The Oddworld Forums Unofficial Mascot
Most Valuable Poster (MVP)
By way of minimal explanation, all votes should be cast based on the activity of 2009 alone! Best New Comer and Most Welcome Return should have started posting/returned last year. Dearly Missed Member should not have posted at all in 2009, or since. Members qualify as veterans if they started posting prior to 2005.
Procedure and Rules
Procedure is the same as always. No nominations, no applications, just vote for which members you think are most deserving of each award by posting them here or sending them to to me email or private message. You don't have to vote on every single category, and you can submit more than one member per category if you really, really cannot decide between two or three members.
There is to be
no voting for yourself, and
no telling other members whom to vote for, whether that's you or someone else.
Regarding the second rule, I see a lot of graffiti in signatures promoting certain members above others with regards to some kind of vote. I'm sure it's all innocent antics not related to this, but it could be construed as a violation of the Terms of Service. Remove it immediately.
By the way, contravening of any rule is punishable by elimination of your eligibility to partake in the receival of any awardation.
To some this may seem like a popularity contest but it's all done in the name of good honest fun. Don't feel bad if you don't get voted for something or anything: the awards bestow no tangeable benefit on the winners. Except for awesomeness.
Voting starts right away and will continue for 3 weeks so the results will be posted on 27 January. Don't post updates of who's winning what and how many votes such-and-such person has. There's nothing to stop you ruining the suspense for yourself by counting public votes but don't be a party pooper and spoil it for others, doofus.
Best Thread Creator
OANST Best Blogger
Strike Witch Greatest Debator
OANST
Funniest Poster
abe is now! Most Unintentionally Funny Poster
abe is now!, again. Most Meaningful Poster
Bullet Magnet, when he actually accomplishes it. Most Underated Poster
Anonyman Best Advice Giver
Nate <3 Member with the Greatest Oddworld Knowledge
Max the Mug Best New Comer
Josh Most Welcome Return
Molluck's Assistant Best Veteran
Hobo Dearly Missed Member
Rex Tirano Most Liked
T-nex Most Eccentric
Disgruntled Intern Most Annoying
Opcro the Slvvykig Most Accomplished Troll
Disgruntled Intern Best Couple
Strike Witch and Used:) Most Dedicated Member
Used:), OANST and Molluck's Assistant Member in Dire Need of a Life
OANST Best Staff Member
Nate Member Who’d Make a Good Moderator
Kastere and Strike Witch and Used:), the ones that got voted out D: The Oddworld Forums Unofficial Mascot
Abbey <3 Most Valuable Poster (MVP)
OANST
Good luck to all <3.
__________________
:
“I always believe the movies I've made are smarter than the way they are perceived by sort of mass culture and by the critics,” Snyder said, a statement he immediately followed by saying, “Also, ‘It looks like a video game.’
“I always believe the movies I've made are smarter than the way they are perceived by sort of mass culture and by the critics,” Snyder said, a statement he immediately followed by saying, “Also, ‘It looks like a video game.’
Best Thread Creator
Havoc Best Blogger
Strike Witch Greatest Debator
OANST
Funniest Poster
OASNT Most Unintentionally Funny Poster
abe is now! Most Meaningful Poster
Bullet Magnet Most Underated Poster
Kastere Best Advice Giver
OANST Member with the Greatest Oddworld Knowledge
Max the Mug Best New Comer
Josh Most Welcome Return
Leto Best Veteran
Xavier Dearly Missed Member
Chubfish Most Liked
T-nex Most Eccentric
Disgruntled Intern Most Annoying
Oh erm...Iluvmares Most Accomplished Troll
Disgruntled Intern Best Couple
Nate and Max Most Dedicated Member
Far too many to count Member in Dire Need of a Life
Wings Of Fire Best Staff Member
Nate Member Who’d Make a Good Moderator
Strike Witch The Oddworld Forums Unofficial Mascot
Abe is now, the local Italian punk Most Valuable Poster (MVP)
OANST
Interesting way of doing it this year, I like the green box
Funniest Poster mollucks assistant - there have been many times where his posts made me laugh.
Most Unintentionally Funny Poster No one. I believe a lot of people are just intentionally and naturally funny, but some just aren't.
Most Meaningful Poster Bullet Magnet - In almost every one of his posts he really puts everything into it.
Most Underrated Poster
Laser - Something tells me this guy needs more love, OK!?
Member with the Greatest Oddworld Knowledge
Max - Should've seen it coming.
Best New Comer Josh - At first I wasn't sure, but he's really started to make himself at home here. That witty guy.
Best Veteran Oddjobabe - Like MA, he's made me laugh quite a few times. Dearly Missed Member
I don't really miss anyone in particular, though we don't see Mitsur round these parts often...
Most Liked
WoF - Everyone loves this guy.
Most Eccentric Strike Witch - All her blogs about... different things are very interesting to look at.
Most Annoying
Abe is now! - There, I said it, I'm sorry but that's what I feel.
Most Accomplished Troll
Kastere - He's really good at that.
Best Couple Max and Fuzzle Guy. It's getting weird, guys.
Most Dedicated Member
MeechShrykull1029 - He just won't give the frick up.
Best Staff Member
Nate - He's always trying to sort shit out here. Grats.
Member Who’d Make a Good Moderator
Pilot - He's gotta have the job of a mod, it's his destiny.
NateFail: You're one to talk about consistency, given you're the one that suggested renaming the awards by year rather than number. Don't tell me to do things a different way then cut my balls off for doing what you say. That's really mean.
Most Mean Member
Nate
:
Interesting way of doing it this year, I like the green box
You didn't like the pink box last year?
:
and i think its a shame the Non-Oddworld Writer award isn't up this year.
It was decided that since there was only really one possible winner, we needn't bother with it.
Best Blogger
OANST. I thoroughly enjoyed reading the stories on the peculiar people he came across. Greatest Debator
Bullet Magnet. I don't recall ever objecting to any of his arguments. He puts his points across very well. Funniest Poster
OANST. Most Underrated Poster MeechMunchie Best New Comer
Josh. There was one particular post that I liked, but I can't remember what it was. Best Veteran
I like Pilot. I enjoy a bit of silliness. Most Liked
Molluck's Assistant. He tickles me often, especially when I can relate to his points. Most Annoying
Opril. I don't often see his posts, but when I do, my blood tends to boil. Most Accomplished Troll
Molluck's Assistant for the Ridg3 "argument". Most Dedicated Member
MeechShrykull. I don't think he realises how entertainingg he is. Member in Dire Need of a Life
MeechShrykull also. I can't understand how an internet forum bothers him so much. Best Staff Member
Fuck. Probably Nate. Member Who’d Make a Good Moderator
DI. Seems quite a no-shit person to me.
__________________
A man walks into a zoo. There's nothing there but one dog. It was a shih-tzu.
Last edited by OddjobAbe; 01-06-2010 at 08:36 AM..
Just for clarification, "Best Couple" isn't restricted to romantic partners. Double acts, be they comedy or they be hatin, fall within this category. Sorry Chris and Nikki, but everyone needs competition. xxx
And it isn't absolutely necessary for the Dearly Missed Member not to have posted in 2009, but if you don't feel you can play it by ear, it's a decent enough guideline. Try and think "Who have I been missing most throughout 2009?", not "Who am I missing right now?"
The 8th Annual Oddworld Forums Poster Awards
)
(it doesn't say what kind of couple! Thank you.)
