Munch's Master, I grow impatient. I break my own promise! Here is more Dante.
It isn't as beefy as the last few chapters, and I feel a bit inadequate.
Could you encourage me a bit? Then I won't feel so bad about posting more short chapters ... (tries to hide the very short chapters he has coming up)
Chapter 57
When the screen suddenly flashed, I blinked hard. Probably not something a Vykker would really do.
No matter. I was staring at the owner and CEO of Tastee Treets. I had to be tough and I had to be … Vykker-ish.
“Hello, Mr. Icarus,†I began. “This is Tore from Vykker’s Labs.†Using the name of the Vykker from the old legends Patch told me wasn’t something I had planned … it simply came out.
Icarus did not respond. He looked resplendent and intimidating in his blindingly shiny red suit and gaudy, oversized matching hat. A fat cigar stump stuck out from his mouth, and he shifted it from the left side of his mouth to the right side and back again.
“Well, Icarus, I have a glukkon pud up here who isn’t exactly pulling his weight.â€
Icarus shifted his cigar. “And …? You want some tips?†He was pretty angry, I figured.
I shook my head. “No. No, I was hoping that you, being such a great gluk, would … take him under your wing, let’s say.â€
I made a good choice in playing the flattery card. Icarus swelled visibly, and looked very proud. I also noted that his cigar was no longer shifting sides. Maybe this would all work out, after all.
“Tore, was it?†Icarus grinned. “What is this young gluk’s name?â€
I racked my brain for a moment, trying to remember what Patch had called the glukkon. And it came to me. “Avid.†And a short burst of inspiration: “He isn’t good with mudokons, but loves to work with sligs. Think you can find a place for him?†I knew a place was available, as Bung, the former officer in charge of Tastee Treets’ sligs training camp was dead and buried down the river.
Icarus thought a moment, and apparently reached the same conclusion (though undoubtedly through a different thought process). “Yes. I think I can get him a position. I’ll make a gluk out of that pud. You can bet your bottom moolah on that.â€
I nodded. “Thank you, sir. He’ll be down later this evening….†What now? How do glukkons and vykkers end their fone conversations?
“Are … are you coming to the Gabbiar Auction tonight?†I ventured.
Icarus snorted. “No way. That stuff gives me the shits. I’m not going to blow any of my 2.5 million on a can of eggs that’ll leave me on the crapper for two days.â€
I chuckled, and Icarus joined me. It was a little awkward for me, and frightening, because laughter in the presence of a glukkon often spelled disaster at the factory.
But you aren’t at the factory, are you? I thought to myself.
In the end I thanked him again and simply hung up. While I still had a place at the computer terminal, I quickly poked around into several programs, hoping to get a layout of the complex I was in.
I would need to find a good suit for Avid.
Luckily, Vykker’s Labs housed a Fine Clothing department, and it was only a short walk from Communications.
I left my computer terminal, which was instantly swarmed by four busy Vykkers, all anxious to make a call, and trotted to the hall and hung a left. I was picking up speed, because I had a gut feeling that time was running short. I needed to finish what I was doing here and get the hell out.
The Fine Clothes department was astoundingly empty. There were three old vykkers behind a counter. The three of them very clearly decided they would like life better living and dressing as females, despite the fact that all vykkers are hermaphrodites.
I approached the counter and rang the bell … even though the three Vykker “women†were right there.
One of them looked up, and in a falsely high voice, greeted me. “Hel-lo! How are we this afternoon?â€
I took a deep breath to calm myself - I had come dangerously close to laughing at “her†- and spoke. “Yeah, I’ve never been in this department before, so if you could help me …â€
The vykkers giggled like the disgusting old women they pretended to be. They quickly introduced themselves as Claude, Harold, and Erek. Why did they keep their manly names? I had time to wonder before being bombarded with questions about what type of suit I wanted.
“Glukkon suit, glukkon suit … no I don’t know the measurements … it’s a gift for a friend at Tastee Treets … yes, Bung … nothing too fancy … I know, but it’s a joke between us, he’ll understand why it’s so cheap looking … something brown and modest … I know, but it’s fine … okay, if you must, then go ahead, make it double breasted … shoes? I hadn’t thought of it. A nice pair of loafers, I guess … yes … no … this evening ….â€
Yikes.
“Is there anything else we can do for you, sweetie?†Claude finished. I noticed that Harold and Erek were blushing madly, and I was a little disgusted to realize that they wanted me … what we could’ve done, I don’t know … all the organs are on the inside ….
I pushed the thoughts away and shook my head. “No, thank you. I need to …†To what? “… I need to go check up on the Gabbiar Auction.â€
They were all very clearly disappointed. “Well, okay,†said Erek. “But don’t you be a stranger!â€
Harold was nodding. “Oh, yes. Do come back soon, you cute little thing! Your suit will be ready in an hour.†Remarkable! But then … they didn’t look too busy, otherwise. And these hags liked me enough to work double-time in order to see me that much sooner.
I nodded and, on a whim, dropped Claude a wink. “She†nearly fainted, and I walked away, hearing mumbles behind me. Such a darling … and so tall! … it’s a wonder he hasn’t tied himself to another Vykker yet…
Once in the hall I let out a shudder I had been holding in. My body just had to do it to remind itself that it was in mudokon control, and that I wasn’t interested in any little favors those hags might or might not do for me.
Now. The Gabbiar Auction. Swift was there. And so I would have to be, too.
|