Me coming out and my family...(!)

Jacob · #1 05-21-2002, 09:50 PM

Ok, i was bord so i made this topic up. I have to be careful what i say cos last time in 'Oddworld discussion' i made a topic saying 'Gay characters' and it suddenly got closed by Sydney saying:

"Your pushing it."

Yeh...ok!!

So, i came out to my nan and mum today...which...sure, was a IMMENSLY bad idea. But i had just taken a few pills to make me go to sleep before hand and after a nice sleep i woke up...feeling like i was pissed with my confidence at a all time high. So...finally it came into convo about gays (Dont ask me how) and i told them...the reaction i got was soooo hilarious. At 1st they thought i was joking...and then when they realised i wasn't they tried to persuade me i was str8...saying stuff like (This is my nan.):

"You cant be Bisexual...your a man."

My mum then attempted to blame it on the Internet, my friends and finally calling it a phase.

I then showed them the scars on my arm from 3 yrs back telling them i did this cos of them...my nan being the bitch she is still wont except who i am and said to me

"So long as no-one else knows its ok."

i replied with:

"You can be ashamed of me, but i aint ashamed of who i am. And you wonder why i hate you bunch of bastards."

And i carried on to tell them stuff like this, saying i hated them and my friends except me and i dont need my family. My nan then says my friends probably laugh behind my back. Daft mare.

Now its all sorted but im still getting this weird feeling from my nan, ahhh well. Thought id share that with you...my nan's comment about me being a man so i cant be bi did make me chuckle though...so i thort id share that wiv u...lol. Cy'all!!

Majic · #2 05-21-2002, 10:02 PM

Heh, that sounds interesting. Your nan and mom sound kinda nearsighted though, like my friend that goes "O, I would never be friends with a gay, he might get to close to me". Heh, but good job, hope ya' pissed them off. And if your friends are laughing behind your back, neuter them with a sharpened coin. Thats right, stand up for yourself! This story is so motivational, not really, but still, interesting...

Gluk Schmuck · #3 05-22-2002, 07:23 AM

Your family's funny. I especially liked your gran's comment.

Sydney · #4 05-22-2002, 10:43 AM

:

Originally posted by Jacob
I made a topic saying 'Gay characters' and it suddenly got closed by Sydney saying:

"Your pushing it."

No I didn't, I said "You're pushing it."

I'm sorry that your family reacted the way they did. But did you have to tell them? If you're bisexual, they would never need to know.

Gluk Schmuck · #5 05-22-2002, 11:44 AM

:

Originally posted by Sydney
But did you have to tell them? If you're bisexual, they would never need to know.

He proabably wanted to annoy them. And, as he said, he was high on sleeping pills.

Jacob · #6 05-22-2002, 01:45 PM

:

No I didn't, I said "You're pushing it."

Whats your point? Not wanting to get into a argument with you why did you actually close that topic when it did get to replies which were NOT dirty.

:

He proabably wanted to annoy them. And, as he said, he was high on sleeping pills.

I dint want to annoy them, it was just stressing my out so much. Plus they said in the past "You can trust us, we'r open minded, you can tell us anything." and a part of me wanted to believe that. And also, being high on the medication i thort..."Hey, what the Hell...mite aswell!!" So i did...i am now regretting it so much now...they actually said to me aswell "How do you know?" so i went "I fancy lads." and they go "Thats normal, to see a lad and think 'He's attractive' you'll get over it, doesn't mean your not normal." I was like "I have feelings for a lad and have done for 2 yrs. Bisexuality is normal, if you dare to say any differently in my pressence i will shout at u and i dont just think 'Oh, he's attractive' i think 'Oh, id shag him' So IM BISEXUAL!!"

They then went quiet for abit...my nan mentioning the Internet and blaming it on that...i then had the task of telling them i had been doubting my sexuality since yr 8. They dint believe me...blaming it on my gay frends and Bi frends.

:

If you're bisexual, they would never need to know.

Like i said before, it was a 'What if they except this' sorta thing. Expectingly they didn't. Obviously you dont really know why gays/bi's come out in the first place. Mainly its so stressful repressing who you really are. And another fact is cos your lying to your friends, family and yourself. You cant just deny who you are forever if you want to be truly happy.

Fazerina · #7 05-22-2002, 02:09 PM

:

Originally posted by Jacob
"You cant be Bisexual...your a man." (1.)

My mum then attempted to blame it on the Internet, my friends and finally calling it a phase. (2.)

"So long as no-one else knows its ok." (3.)

"You can be ashamed of me, but i aint ashamed of who i am. (4.)

1.

2. It's always a phase!

And then it's: "Who is vegetarian now? Who has pierced herself now? Who did this and that?" *argh* Like I couldn't make choises for me. It's always because someone else has done it. My mom's annoying...

3. Yeah. "Keeping up with the Joneses" is all that matters...

4. Well good for you!

MudokonOddball · #8 05-22-2002, 09:25 PM

:

Originally posted by Fazerina

"Keeping up with the Joneses" is all that matters...

*growls* I'm a Jones....well, at least I set good standards. :P

Statikk HDM · #9 05-22-2002, 09:53 PM

Come on Jacob. Lets keep this site family friendly, all right?You flamer, you little troll, you, maybe not every wants to hear about your struggles with your sexuality. Put a lid on it.

Majic · #10 05-22-2002, 10:36 PM

Thats just cold, Statikk, just cold...

Sydney · #11 05-22-2002, 10:47 PM

:

Originally posted by Jacob
Whats your point? Not wanting to get into a argument with you why did you actually close that topic when it did get to replies which were NOT dirty.

My point is that I used correct punctuation when I said you were pushing it. And I can't recall the exact reasons why I closed your topic, but that's in the past.

:

Obviously you dont really know why gays/bi's come out in the first place. Mainly its so stressful repressing who you really are. And another fact is cos your lying to your friends, family and yourself. You cant just deny who you are forever if you want to be truly happy.

I have a handful of gay/lesbian friends. I know why gays want to come out into the open. They want to be accepted for who they are, and want to be able to act honestly, not pretending to be someone who they're not. I just thought perhaps telling your family was a mistake as you've said before that they're very intolerant of homosexuality. You are bisexual, so it's easier to please them without making them aware of your sexuality.

BiddaMD · #12 05-22-2002, 10:49 PM

Jacob, man, that was cool. As long as you're true to what you think then its all good. Nobody can deny their own feelings, no matter what others tell them. And, if you live with people (like your parents) its good to let them know.....whether it would have affected them or not. And oh, Stattik......people who hate homosexuals tend to be ones themselves. Grow up dude, its the 2000's.

Statikk HDM · #13 05-22-2002, 10:59 PM

I am grown up! And, oh master of the 2000's did ya ever think maybe I don't want to listen to peoples crazy sexual exploits?

Sydney · #14 05-22-2002, 11:02 PM

:

Originally posted by Statikk HDM
I am grown up! And, oh master of the 2000's did ya ever think maybe I don't want to listen to peoples crazy sexual exploits?

Nobody forced you to read this topic, and there were enough clues in the subject line to know what this thread is about.

Danny · #15 05-23-2002, 04:59 PM

:

Originally posted by Sydney
I'm sorry that your family reacted the way they did. But did you have to tell them? If you're bisexual, they would never need to know.

I find the idea that people would have to keep their sexuality a secret quite disturbing, and I think that they do need to know, if only for my/your/Chris's own peace of mind...

My mother has spent most of my life making sure that I know that it's okay to be homosexual (she herself is Bisexual), so I find it difficult to imagine living with Chris's family. I really sympathise with you, Chris, even if I am unable to empathise. My mother doesn't actually know I'm bisexual, but I haven't made a conscious effort to keep it a secret, it's just never come up in conversation. If it ever did, I would just say "yeah, I'm bisexual", and carry on the conversation. I know for a fact that she wouldn't mind, and I don't see it as much of a big deal. I suppose if it were more of a big deal, I might make more of an effort to tell her...

Statikk, I think by now we've heard quite enough of your prejudices. From now on, if you don't have anything nice (and/or relevant) to say, just keep your holier-than-thou mouth shut!

dark_xinos · #16 05-23-2002, 05:34 PM

So long. And thanks for all the fish,

Jacob · #17 05-23-2002, 06:42 PM

:

So long. And thanks for all the fish,

A quote that i will be saying to my future wife when i tell her im gay and running off with the plumber.

(I hope somebody gets that...its such a amusing joke!!)

Sydney · #18 05-23-2002, 06:55 PM

:

Originally posted by Danny
I find the idea that people would have to keep their sexuality a secret quite disturbing, and I think that they do need to know, if only for my/your/Chris's own peace of mind...

He wouldn't have to shroud it with secrecy, but as you said yourself, your mother doesn't know about your bisexuality and you're not intentionally keeping it from her.

It must be difficult to tell your homophobic family that you're gay.