Something that I found funny...

[Melvin:squeeking paramite]

I was looking through my old collection of MAD magazines from the 60's, 70's and 80's (after 1990, MAD started to become stupid) and I found a funny artictle making fun of extreme right-wingers. It's written by Stan Hart, and called "A Model Majority Manual". It's mocking stupid right wing booklets telling people to abide by your government, love God, etc. I'm going to post part of it, a glossary of sarcastic terms mocking conservatives.

God: Our creator, who is filled with wrath at the way our schools have become dens of atheism, and Liberals attempt to destroy His Word. God will save only those who believe as we. He said so when he spoke to Jerry Foulwell.

Liberal: Your enemy! He could be any thing from a Bomb-Throwing Commie Rat-to a Bomb-Throwing Natural Food Addict.

Pornography: Any thing that shows sex in a sordid light... Or a lascivious light.... or in a good light... or in a bad light... or in any light whatsoever!

The Bill Of Rights: We have no opinion on this, since we've never read it, and suggest you don't either, especially the first 5 ammendments.

Freedom: Our God-given right to pressure, boycott and harrass those who don't agree with us!

Abortion: Murder, pure and simple! We feel that life begins the moment the man has the woman's bra unhooked.

Homosexuals: Pansies who are taking over tghe country! They must be stopped. Otherwise, one day-instead of pledging to the red, white and blue-we'll all be saluting pink, cream and aqua.

Feminist: One who believes in the "wrong idea" that women should have the same rights as men! Just remember, if God had intended women to be equal, He wouldn't have made them have to shave their legs.

Conservatives: This used to be a dirty word, and with us, it still is! We are extreme right-wingers and don't let Commie dupes like William "Hammer and Sickle" Buckley lead you astray.

Capital punishment: Putting the rats to death! We feel frying them in the chair or gassing or hanging them will deter murder (like abortionists).

Separation of Church and State: The State must never interfere with the affairs of the church! Naturally, the doctrine does not appy the other way around.

Permissiveness: Allowing people to behave any way they want and to express ideas contrary to those we believe in! What greater threat could there be to the existance of our Democratic society?

Hehe... Stinky old conservatives. (note: this was not to offend... it was all in good humor... I think... Hey, I didn't write it!)

[munchman]

i have MAD mags too, they are funny, i have like the first ones made they are old

[Gluk Schmuck]

Excellent work on finding that, Dylan.

Now copy-up the rest of it. Hurry up!

[pinkgoth2]

Originally posted by Melvin:squeeking paramite
God: Our creator, who is filled with wrath at the way our schools have become dens of atheism, and Liberals attempt to destroy His Word. God will save only those who believe as we. He said so when he spoke to Jerry Foulwell.

Check out http://www.sinfest.net - God will save the people that believe in him... well... unless they tick him off... ;)

Sinfest has a great comic, btw - I can only recommend it wholeheartedly.

"ANYTHING YOU WANT! $your soul"


- TyA

[Gluk Schmuck]

Originally posted by pinkgoth2
"ANYTHING YOU WANT! $your soul"

I liked those ones. My favourite are probably the ones with Percy and T'other One. "Enemies all around"

[Joe the Intern]

Haha! That was great! I have to agree with you though. All the new MAD mags suck.

[pinkgoth2]

Originally posted by Gluk Schmuck
I liked those ones. My favourite are probably the ones with Percy and T'other One. "Enemies all around"

lol, Percy is such a hypocrit, too. "Have you nothing better to do?" ... and as soon as no one's looking, PLAY WITH THE BALL.

It kinda makes you think, though. *waits in line by the ANYTHING YOU WANT stall* It really does ;) Would you "sell your soul" for anything at all, come to think of it?


- TyA