Here are some, I'll post more when I think of 'em.
Two Mudokons are taking a walk in Paramonia. They come to a disused well with no lever to activate it, and they wonder how deep it is. They throw stones of various sizes down it, but they don't hear them hit the bottom. They spot a boulder, and decide to throw it down, to see if they can hear that hit the bottom. With much effort, the two of them pick it up and throw it down the well. Still they hear nothing! One of them then spots a medium-sized tree, and with a lot of effort they uproot it and throw it down the well. As they do so, an Elum comes charging along. It runs between them and jumps down the well! As the two Mudokons puzzle over the strange actions of the Elum, they are approached by a third Mudokon, who asks them if they have seen his Elum. They tell him that an Elum has just jumped down the well in front of them.
"No, that couldn't be my Elum," says the third Mud, "my Elum was tied to a tree!"
***
How do you know if a Scrab has been in your fridge?
Footprints in the butter!
***
Some Sligs are in a plane, on a military training mission. As they fly towards their barracks, the plane starts to run out of fuel.
"We're losing power!" yells the Slig who is piloting the plane, "we'll have to throw something out to lighten the plane!"
One of the other Sligs throws a railgun out of the plane.
"Throw more stuff out!" yells the pilot.
Another Slig throws a Blitzpacker out of the plane.
"Not enough!" says the pilot, "chuck something else out!"
Yet another Slig throws a petrol bomb out of the plane.
By now the plane has lost just enough weight for it to land safely at the barracks. As all the Sligs walk to their work-stations, they come across another Slig, who is lying on the ground, obviously in a lot of pain. They ask him what's wrong with him, and he manages to reply that a railgun appeared from nowhere and landed on his head.
As our Sligs walk on, they meet another Slig who is even more badly injured than the other one they met. Again, they ask what happened to him, and he barely manages to reply that a Blitzpacker arrived from nowhere and hit him on the head.
Walking on, they meet a Slig who is laughing hysterically. Our Sligs ask him what he finds so funny, to which he replies,
"You won't believe this, but I just farted and the General's office just exploded!"
***
How can you tell if the Scrab is still in your fridge?
The door won't shut!
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Hand me my flamethrower... it's the one that says 'Bad Motherfucker'.
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