:
Originally posted by Jacob
So...wait. They are making merchandise of themselves...? Ok...erm...and making films of themselves...? So...somehow they're thinking;
Alien Commandor: "Hmmm. We need to get one more planet involved in our party so that we can be more popular than the Pinks. Who shall we have!?"
Alien #1: "We could try Pluto...?"
Alien Commandor: "Hell no, those little bastards are in heat most of the time. We dont need this party to turn into some orgy...!!"
Alien #2: "Hmmm...what about Earth?"
Alien #1: "Are you f*cking insane...!?! Those freaks are oozing hostility...!! Last time Mork tried to say 'Hello' he got a nuke up his ass...then dragged away...and then got a scalpel up his ass...and then...cut up some more. We cant go down there with them being so...so...so violent!!"
Alien Commandor: "We could...no...it would be too dangerous."
Alien #2: "What?"
Alien Commandor: "We could make toys, films, books about ourselves. To climatise them to ourselves...and such like. We could also use the Gorgios technology to abduct certain individuals...and make ourselves known to them one at a time."
Alien #1: "How so?"
Alien Commandor: "Well, we go in stealth mode. Pick up some American. Prod him a little bit. Speak to him. Use a mind eraser. Then throw him back down. He will awaken, realise he has lost time...wonder how. And as he thinks harder he will remember it."
Alien #1: "My God, sir. Thats genious!!"
Alien Commandor: "Thats why i'm Commandor. I can see it now, we will hover low in our craft. People will take photo's. Shout 'Hello' to us and such and such. We will get out, wave and state 'Yes, its me...from those movies. How are you.' we will then begin to sign autographs. Yes...Yes...Goddamnit...we'll be loved!!"
Alien #1 & 2: "Yey!!"
When...in reality;
Bush: "They're what...? Again...? Jesus Christ!! Tell them we dont want to go to this party...tell them to go away."
General: "They seem serious, sir."
Bush: "Ugh...errrrmmm...hmmmm...do that thing...you know, that we're going to do to Iraq..."
General: "Go to war?"
Bush: "No, no, no. Thats just a cover story...it begins with 'N'..."
General: "Nuke them?"
Bush: "Yerrrrr..."
General: "Thats two words, sir."
*Gunshot*
Bush: "Quiet."
*Loud thud as body hits floor*
Bush: "Ellen, will you come in here and drag the Generals corpse away, please. And tell my father he's the new General. And tell him we're gonna nuke some...some tall people. And the French. Yerrr, the French aswell. Oh, and ring Tony up...tell him i'm free tonight...yeh...thats all. Leave."
|
Its official. Jacob's gone insane.