*ahem* i have been alerted from my email that you AS were writing this, and i have one thing to say, i will BLESS THE
I’ve been lonely recently. Quite lonely.
Sitting in my cell all by myself. Mr. T doesn’t pay me any visits any more. They don’t let me out of my cell to wander the halls any more. Not since they implanted those butt augs...
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http://www.planetdeusex.com/features...and/11/gas.jpg[/img]
And Mr. Box is gone too. I’ve been missing him as of late. I’m afraid he’s in those burgers... now in the bowels of the MJ12 guards... Or perhaps, the bowel movements of them. And MJ12 is treating me like I’m not even alive. They were starting to use my cell for storage. Their single underwater facility is getting a bit too cramped.
They’ve been putting boxes in my room.
That’s when I realized.
I have all the Mr. Boxes I’d ever need.
But then, since I’d been getting high off the marker fumes, and contaminated the boxes with my... well...
Urine...
They had to burn them all.
...
So now I’m lonely again.
Did I ever tell you guys about the completion of the puppy division?
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Oh, yeah, they finished that a while back. To test it out, they gave each prisoner their own dog, and they had this big dog show so the dogs could test our their doggy augs.
...
They were testing out their running augs...
...
All the dogs had to run across the room as fast as they could and come immediately over to their owner.
Xavier’s dog mauled him. So your story is obviously false. Because he’s been dead long before you were born, mister, and he’ll be dead loooong before you’re dead.
Anyway, it was my dog’s turn...
...
My dog ran halfway across the room. Then it stopped dead... And crapped. Right there. On the floor. In front of everybody.
...
They laughed at me. All of them. Said that the dog must have butt augs too. WELL I’LL SHOW THEM. I’LL SHOW THEM ALL. I’LL GIVE THEM THE BEST DAMN DOG THEY’VE EVER SEEN.
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http://www.planetdeusex.com/features...d/11/doggy.jpg[/img]
Down, Fido.
Down.
That’s a good boy.
FIDO.
...
*Ghand pokes audience unsurely.*
He’s dead, Jim
Confusing? Perhaps for those of the weaker mind. But for those of the stronger, the relation will come clear easily.
...
What the hell did I just say?
Man... I wonder what MJ12 has been putting into my food recently.
Normally I’m an idiot!
I mean... uh...
I’m... always... this smart... uhm... aha...
*sweats*
And now back to acting like a fool in meaningless columns to get a few cheap laughs!
BIRD BIRD BIRD! BIRD IS THE WORD!
well um....somthing