There was this girl at school who was always talking to herself and we kept on asking her who she was talking to. She wouldn't tell us at first but she eventually said that she was talking to her friend "James Reed." I wonder who he is. We kept on teasing her and it was really funny. I think she got suspended for stalking a teacher and spitting on his car.
I sometimes talk to myself when gaming. I usually swear when I can't do a level straight away.
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The trouble with real life is that there's no danger music.
If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let'em go, because, man, they're gone.
If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor people, like now.
Consider the daffodil. And while you're doing that, I'll be over here, looking through your stuff. -- Jack Handy
That stuff only happens in the movies. -- Famous Last Words
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