[Jacob]

Your objective is simple: Widespread Misery.

Your motive is a little bit more complex: Love (Yes, it works)

Stage One
To begin your plan, you must first assassinate a pope. This will cause the world to swallow nervously, unsettled by your arrival. Who is this unholy menace? Where did they come from? And why do they look so good in a corporate suit?


Stage Two
Next, you must seize control of the Moon (ooh, tides!). This will all be done from a hell, a mysterious place of unrivaled dark glory. Upon seeing this, the world will lose their minds, as countless hordes of winged monkeys hasten to do your every bidding.


Stage Three
Finally, you must unleash your great supernatural forces, bringing about an end to sanity. Your name shall become synonymous with fuzzy bunnies, and no man will ever again dare sneer cruelly at your disfigured face. Everyone will bow before your extraordinary charisma, and the world will have no choice but to give you control of the planet.


Mine is just soooo totally inevitable...