Chapter4: Desert
"May the Force be with you Sean!!!" Said Nick."Ya ya whatever." I shouted. I went through a door and found myself in a hot ass desert. There was a sign fallen on the ground that said WELCOME TO THE 1ST LAYER OF HELL with a Slig skeleton hanging on it with an empty canteen about two inches away from it. It still seemed to be crawling. "Eww..... Aw great that dumb f**k forgot to give me a map!!!' I shouted."Ay know how ta get ya anywhers ya want," Said a Slig with a high Australian accent."That is if ya have tha money for it." "Um I'm flat broke so sorry." I said. "Aw thats tew bad now isn't et? If ya eva get some moolaw my names Jordan." Then I looked down at all the Who's in Whoville got an idea.A terrible idea. A wonderful idea. i had a wonderfuly terrible idea!!!!! "Hey look it's Elvis!!!!" I shouted. "Where?!" Asked Jordan. " ZOINK," I shouted and stole the map from him. "Muahahaha!!!! You f****ing idiot how stupid can you get!!!!" I shouted and ran like hell away from him. "Hey get back here you pot head!!!! Thats not a map it's my...*BOOM*...nytro... glycerine." Yelled Jordan. " Oh now you tell me.... YOU DUMB F***K WHY DIDN"T YOU TELL ME!!!!! What the hell have you been smoking you toe-licker!!!!!" "Well it's not my fault you didn't listen you crab-ass!!!!!" He shouted. "Hey no one calls me a crab-ass you crab-ass!!!!!YAAAAAAAARRRRRGH!!!!!!" I screamed and attacked Jordan. "Die you mother f****ing bastard!!!! Go to hell, I want you to diiiiieeeeeeee!!!!" I screamed and kicked him in the mouth. "Aw f***k now you did it you bastard!!!" He shouted then bitch slapped me right in the eye."Aw the hell with this, I'm outta here!!!!" I shouted, and ran the hell away from there. About another two hours later of following the map, I came to some sort of....... uhhhh wagon without wheels with about eight Scrabs tied onto it. "What the hell is this thing?" I asked. I read the map when on the back
I discoverd directions. "How to control magic flying Scrabs. Oh yah like thats going to work! What do I sit in here and yell on Dasher, on Dancer, on Prancer, Vixen, on Comet, on Cupid, on Donner, and Blitzen!!!" Sudenly the .... whatever it was, let's just call it a hovermajig for now, started floating, and the Scrabs started running but instead of running they were flying." Oh great it's Santas flying Scrabs. What next!!! Hey i wonder were Rudolf is? Hah! A flying Scrab with a red nose, what an idea!" Just then a Scrab with a bright red nose attacked the ...... hovermajig and nearly tipped it over. " So thats why they don't have Rudolf in the lsit of eight riendeer!!! He attacked people, thats why!!!!" I said. for another half an hour we flew through the blood red sky of the 1st layer of hell, when the Scrabs landed in some sort of city." Welcome ta Sin City how the hell are ya?"
Oddling l:c l
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