[MeechMunchie]

Chattin' with Joe

go on minecraft
begin to redecorate house
extend claim to cover house
house is invaded by two 14-year-olds
14-year-olds ask for various tools and resources to help them start
i hand them over

14-year-olds march into my garden
start stealing all my wheat
chop down half my orchard
say "hey your house is great let's live here"

proceed to dig up garden
proceed to live in hole under my garden
proceed to invade my mines from undeneath and flood them with lava
proceed to be agressively evicted by yours truly

offer to pay me rent in iron
(they already took some diamond ore from my mine, guess which one is more valuable)
i say i'd rather have my garden back
they complain that my garden isn't big enough
i suggest they might want to live somewhere else
they go "ow harsh"

another 14-year-old turns up
"hey this house is cool is it yours"
"no it's [Albert]'s"
"can i live here too" (directed at squatters)
"sure"
Me: "I take it I don't get a say in this"

proceed to dig until they reach a distant island occupied by my friend sam
the preceeding logged hours of gameplay have allowed me to expand my claim to cover my garden, so I promplty fill in their tunnel, claim the land on top so they can't dig it out again, and put up a sign reading:

TIGER GAMING
All are welcome!
(But you can't all live in my garden)

and to this day, there is still an ugly 10x10 patch of mangled orchard which they annexed when they first dug their squat
legally they own it and i can't clear it up, even though they don't live there any more
so i just built a big wall around it and called it a day
it was pretty funny, but i think i'd have found it funnier if it wasn't my garden.
they seem happy enough now where they are, i just wish i could have that chunk of my garden back.

i was going to build a sheep paddock
i need wool to carpet my house
also my ceiling for dumb minecraft reasons

the moral of the story is: don't make really convenient publically accessible facilities right next to where you live.

Today was eventful.