Having straight 4s in the bass go against that motif doesn't really work, especially when the attack on that sound is so delayed. I think I know why it doesn't work, but I'm not certain enough to really give it as public feedback.
Varrok's kindof right about the melody, but hie missed the mark because it's not really melodic. This is crying out to be the harmonic basis for an electronic piece. Take this idea away from dubstep and see where it goes. Trust me.
Also, why do you post so many half finished pieces?
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