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Normad.... Many members start off scared and in a bad position here.. But if they stick around, learn the ropes and just keep going they usually find a way to fit in. It's really beneficial in the long run, cos we usually form a tight bond with each other.
Im sad to see you upset over all this though. In all honesty, no one has been really mean to you. A lot of people here had it much worse, and they still stuck around, and now it's all fine. If you're not gonna stay, at least take our advice for the next forum you visit  It could pay off.
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already 3 and a half years here in OWF and I am still scared of you guys. also I feel that I am not really part of this community.