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So, hang on, let me get this straight. Exclusion from social situations is always bullying, all the time? Is this what you’re trying to tell me?
- Okay, so that guy I met one day that I hardly know? Gotta invite him to dinner otherwise bullying.
- A friend of a friend who I meet often but detest? Gotta let him come to the party otherwise abuse.
- That dude who got drunk and smashed my coffee table? Gotta invite him out clubbing next time otherwise infringing on human rights.
I think you’re using a very general description here which doesn’t necessarily apply to all situations. In fact, the idea of ignoring/staying away from people you dislike is generally encouraged as mature behavior.
In your case, not inviting some guy places because he was an absolute nightmare to be around is perfectly reasonable, and I don’t think anyone would really label it as bullying. (the verbal abuse not so much, but I digress.)
To take that incredibly specific example and use it as justification of bullying as being brought on by oneself, and something that should be encouraged is just wrong. |
From my understanding, it's by definition bullying. Fact is that a bunch of people from my school, including me, got chewed out by the deputy head for taking these actions against this particular person. Because he'd be upset by it, he'd go home and tell his mother, then she'd complain, then we got told off - and none of the staff seemed to understand that the reason we avoided him was because he was a genuinely unpleasant person to be around, and hell knows that the mother would never admit to raising a dipshit.
Also, on your last sentence - I'm not saying all bullying is brought on by the victim, but sometimes it's a case of acting like a dick and being treated like one for it