[Wil]

If a cat stares at you, just turn around and don't look at it. If you stare at a cat you're saying 'fight me' or 'I want your territory'.

Cats enjoy being stroked because it's nostalgic - it reminds them of being licked by their mothers. Only if you touch a tender or ticklish spot will you be swiped at - the belly is usually very sensitive to cats, as is the tail.

Cats bring mice home because humans are really stupid and can't even hunt. I mean, what sort of pathetic bipedal mammal doesn't even catch it's own food?

Dogs don't have sharp claws unless they have sharp claws. Which a lot of dogs do. Dogs that don't have sharp claws have sharp claws because they've de-evolved from a hunting pack animal into a pet.

They're facts. So is this: I like cats and dogs.