A long, long time ago, I once saw a film called Surf Ninjas. It was a crappy, early 90's, Rob Schneider, ninja film. I didn't remember much about it, but the other day I was flipping through channels and came across it. The first thing that I noticed that I hadn't been aware of when I saw it as a kid, was that it has the guy who played Willie Loomis on Dark Shadows in it. I fucking love Willie Loomis, so I decided to watch the whole thing.
The movie is bad. The dialogue is terrible, and the acting is even worse. So, I never expected to laugh, which is why when the one section of this film that actually is funny came up, it caught me completely by surprise, and had me bending over, gagging, with lemonade dripping from my nose. Now, without further ado, I present to you: MONEY CAN'T BUY KNIVES.