[Mac Sirloin]

All this Weeaboo discussion is dragging this story by the ankles out of my brain. It's not really about Weeaboos, but WHATEVA YO:
This is another true one.

I went to the Dentist today (4/20 for lyfe get fillings every day) and while waiting in the lobby this guy I know well enough to recognize despite his suddenly having long hair walks in. He didn't acknowledge me at all, despite my slight wave and nod. Instead, he walked right over to the other end of the room, picked up the game Manual for Luigi's Mansion which was sitting on a small pile of Gamecube games. this was not the strategy guide or anything, oh no, this was the small, 20 page bilingual pamphlet that you read if you're 12 years old and Luigi's Mansion just came out. This guy is either my age or older and Luigi's Mansion is almost a decade old.

I thought that was odd, but whatever, maybe he was just bored. I find out I have 15 minutes to wait so I pick up a Far Side collection and read it. Some way through this the guys mom shows up. He engages in a loud, loud, FUCKING LOUD conversation with her about how he think Doctor Seuss is "one of the most brilliant, amazing people [he's] ever heard of."

So I sat there trying to focus on my comics as this guy farted out of his mouth in a really nasally, nerdy voice about something his mom was desperately trying to pretend to care about. I'm not going to say I haven't said some incredibly mundane, nerdy shit to my parents in the past, but usually that was either at home or in the car. Not in a Dentist's Lobby full of people in a loud as fuck voice. It also involved something like "So Batman died in the comic books."
Dad: "No he didn't!"
"Yup."
Dad: "Well! Huh!"

Anyways, he gets called in first, and moments later, so do I. But he's still talking loud as fuck to a Dental Hygienist who, bless her heart, really obviously had no shit to give. First he started talking about how Batman never kills anyone in the comic books, or something. Something that would be a brief message board topic on a comic book forum, but no. No. He dragged that shit out for ten minutes, and then, after a brief, peaceful silence, he states (for absolutely no fucking reason.) "I'm The Nostalgia Critic, I remember it so you don't have to." For attention. He fucking made that claim in the middle of a goddamn Dentists office. At this point I forced myself to ignore him. I stared up at the flourescent lights and explained how to install a ballast in my head. Repeatedly. I do this when I feel stressed. It helps.

So then he gets into how Superman doesn't kill anyone in the comics.
"Well, uh...you know why they call him that."
"Call him? Uh?"
"They call him thuh (the+uh)...Boyscout in Blue!"

At this point I think he either had some kind of sharp metal in his teeth or was done. Or I blocked the rest out.

This reminds me of OANST's WoW Neckbeard dinner.