[shaman]

Meh.

6) The worst journey.

It was early morning, greeted by a clear blue sky and the sound of all manner of odd creature squeaking and grunting. The camp fire flickered and provided welcome warmth in the cold morning wind which swept through the jungle; Ianto was sitting outside his newly constructed shelter, blinking dimly in the sunlight. The other mudokons were snoozing in their shelters behind him.

Marley had taken up this new task of getting to The Old Kingdom’s capital with zealous enthusiasm; in no more than a few days, Ianto and the others had advanced some fifty miles towards the capital and the promise of a large fortune in moolah. But however, eventually weariness had set in and they had been forced to take refuge just outside a mysterious native village in the jungle next to a large river serving as a make – shift harbour to ships from the sea a few miles south, nature had carved a large clearing in the vast expanses of trees allowing a permanent settlement to built there several hundred years ago.

It usually played a role in helping the nomadic natives with their supplies, but now it was a haven for bandits like Ianto to seek shelter. They had decided to camp outside the village so as to not draw attention to themselves.

“Sleep well?”

Ianto turned round, Marley was strolling towards him

“Yeah” Ianto replied. “Nice to finally be somewhere we aren’t always being hunted by the law.”

Marley nodded and sat down beside Ianto. “I know the feeling?”

Ianto was determined to break the awkward silence. “Where are we?”

“This is Mudok port”. Marley sighed “I grew up not far from here”. He pointed far out into the forest, “about five miles that way.”

Ianto smiled. “That guy, Toko or whatever his name was, he said we were going to help win the war. What can we possibly do?”

“The Old Kingdom” Marley replied. “Is full of very Old, very Odd stuff; I don’t know exactly what or who Toko is , what he wants from us or what we can do to aid the rebellion, I’m only here for the moolah ... not unlike yourself.”

“But don’t you care about all this?!” Ianto snapped. “You said it yourself, you grew up here!, why wouldn’t you do anything you could to save it”!


“I’m not Abe Odd dammit!” Marley retorted. “Plus The Old Kingdom doesn’t need protection, not from mortals anyway.”

Ianto spat. “Tell me you’re not one of those nutters who thinks a shrykulls just going to pop up and fight off the industrialists?!”

Marley sniggered. “I’m guessing you’re not a believer Ianto, never heard of The Ninth Chieftain?”

“Well yes of course I’ve heard of The Ninth Cheiftan but he was just a myth and I don’t believe all that prophecy crap”! Ianto laughed.

Marly Turned to Ianto, and it was immediately clear that he was offended.

“Ahem ... Sorry” Ianto Mumbled.

“Don’t worry yourself” Marley chuckled, beliefs aside we should be exploring the village a little, you know ... mingle a bit.”

“Yeah” Ianto replied, “I know what you mean.”
There was the sound of jimmy yawning and emerging from his shelter.

“What did I miss?” He said blinking stupidly in the morning sun.

“Nothing aside from the usual blasphemy” Marley replied. “Get your gear on, we’re taking a look round”.

It didn’t take long for the four of them to get ready and walk into the mudok port, the village was a strange little place. Two rows of large twisted native buildings separated by a large, wide muddy road, everything was held up by the typical long strands of wood used in native buildings, crooked and at odd angles, as though they could fall at any moment, the wooden structures were bleached a pale chestnut and looked very damp and old.

Mystery was lurking round every corner, dozens of weird looking traders sporting merchandise from half the world away, and yet there was no hustle and bustle. The town was eerie, and Ianto had the impression that by being here he was intruding on something indecent, and frightfully shameful. He had only been to the Monsaic Lines once, but if there was another place on Oddworld like that; Mudok port was that place.

The four Mudokons strolled cautiously through the town. Occasionally being approached by a sketchy native babbling away in a language none of them knew there were thousands of dialects in The Old Kingdom, but very few creatures in the whole of Oddworld could claim to be fluent in many of them. Still, strange as the village was, the four friends thought it was safe enough to part ways and take a look around. Plus this was a good place to stock up for the remainder of the trip to the capital.

The doorbell rang as Ianto stepped into the leaky old store, there was no – one to be seen, but still this was a very cool place, stashed onto shelves were dozens of mechanicals – mainly weaponry – and behind the counter shielded by a glass plain were several very beautiful close combat tools and a few very impressive guns. The walls were covered in strange native art similar to the cave art found around Mudos, and the scrab and paramite symbols dominated one of the windowless walls.

Ianto was examining one of them when he heard footsteps, turning round; a grub adorned in many tattoos strolled in.

“Hi”, Ianto said.

The grub looked up; Ianto almost wished he hadn’t said anything, the grub’s eyes widened with delight.

“I know you” It whispered intently.

“No” Ianto gulped. “We’ve never met”

The grub nodded frantically. “Yes we have! We have met before Ianto”...
Ianto was now becoming more alarmed. “H-how do you know my name”.

The grub hopped over the counted and waddled over to Ianto, “Going to the capital?”
“Yes”.

The grub smiled. “You should watch out”, it said. “Lots of things stirring up in the jungle lately”

Ianto gulped, this was precisely why he didn’t care much for native shamans.

“You’ve been going a long time” The grub continued “but hell i would too if there was five hundred thousand moolah in it for me”...

This was too much for Ianto. “How the hell do you know that”!!? He snapped.

The grub stared at him.

“Round these parts, you learn how to know things other guys don’t ... it’s kinda an art -
form ... and we could use some more rain y’know”.

As soon as the grub had finished, large raindrops splattered against the window, and soon it was a full – fledged storm. Ianto looked outside into the pouring rain, and then back at the grinning Grub.

“Yeah” Ianto whispered refusing to believe any of it. “I’m just gonna go now”.

Ianto walked out into the downpour outside, he couldn’t wait to find Marley, Jimmy and Tony so they could get out of here. Seeing as the inhabitants were clearly raving mad. Trying to put the Grub in the shop out of his mind and focus on getting through the waterlogged jungle and to the capital so they could finally find out what that Toko lunatic was on about.

Ianto trudged through the sodden streets, but it was a curious little route and he kept ending up walking in circles. In all fairness the others could have gotten into any one of the countless nooks and crannies in the village but Ianto still entertained the possibility of going on without them.

Soon Ianto found himself sitting down right next to the weapon shop he had left a while earlier, until a familiar face came into view through the rain.

“Hey Ianto” The tall broad mudokon said.

“HOLY SHIT IT’S YOU” Ianto shouted jumping up and hugging the Mudokon “Elza you sly scrub! They told me you got shot! ... how longs it been?”

“About a year” Elza chuckled, “I’ve had to lay low since that airship robbery in Paramonia ... you remember?”

Ianto sniggered, this was a welcome arrival, he was totally used to having his past come back to haunt him, it wasn’t often he ran into an old friend.
Elza; was a blast from Ianto’s previous incarnation as a highwayman in Parmonia, a twenty- four year old mudokon who had travelled the length and breadth of oddworld.

He was also, the person who had befriended Ianto in his twelfth year and introduced him to the life of crime. Ianto had left Paramonia shortly after he turned eighteen, partly because the natives were getting far to irate with his dodgy dealings and Ianto had almost been executed three times, and also because the bandits kept getting eaten by paramites in the wilderness.

“That airship robbery” ... Ianto laughed, “I hated you for that.” He indicated to a mark on his forearm where the word “thief” had been branded into his skin, a reminder better than any other not to ever get caught.
Elza flinched like a curious child “So what you up to here?”

“I’m off to the capital?”

Elza’s jaw dropped “suit yourself Ianto but don’t get yourself killed mind.”

“I’ll try ... so what about you, what’re you doin in this shithole?”

Elza looked around, he wasn’t smiling anymore, and then he whispered to Ianto. The moment Ianto saw his expression he knew there would be trouble.

“Ah ... Elza” Ianto squirmed “Do you mind if you give me time to get out before you pull
a heist here”? Ianto squirmed; he was damn near to getting five hundred grand and he wasn’t going to go to jail because his dumb mate decided to commit a raid in the village.

“Well I’m sorry Ianto but I got sixty feisty bandits over that hill there waiting for my signal, I can’t just wait for you and your lot to get out can I? Not when you’re not even pulling a heist.”

Ianto’s heart dropped. “Just gimmie two minutes and we’ll be out of your hair.”

“Sorry dude” Elza walked straight past Ianto, pulling up a mask as he went and walked straight into the weapon store.

“Oh for ODD SAKE”! Ianto yelled and pulling his own mask up over his face sprinted into the shop after Elza.

“Don’t do this”! Ianto begged, “at least not yet.”

Elza looked at Ianto. “Don’t be such a killjoy.” And with that he produced a small walky – talky from his loincloth and put it to his lips.

“Come on in boys”, He laughed. “Get lootin”!
Ianto swore under his breath, and sure enough, he heard the sound of Elum and gunfire outside as sixty bandits charged into Mudok port. The familiar sound of screaming began and soon the whole village was fleeing from the sixty masked natives dismounting and running rampant, looting anything that wasn’t nailed down.

The grub ran out from behind the counter. “Who the hell are you two”!? (He clearly hadn’t recognised Ianto who still had his mask up)
Elza pulled out a spoocebow “THIS IS A HOLDUP”! He shouted “EMPTY THE TILL”!
The terrified Grub obeyed and looking outside, Ianto saw several of the villages buildings were aflame, lots of valuables were being hoisted onto the Elum and the townspeople were screaming, Ianto had seen this a million times before.

“ELZA THIS IS A NATIVE VILLAGE” He shouted.

“I know that” Elza laughed “but it’s fair game, it’s not like the war matters, we’re not on anyone’s side here.”

“Oh oddamit” Ianto shouted and ran out of the shop onto the street, it was still raining, and the water mingled with the flames shooting up from the buildings, these were exactly the kind of Bandits Ianto didn’t hang around with. He was never one for just running into a village and starting to shoot, Ianto was a more subtle thief.
There were several terribly loud bangs and Ianto looked around to see the townspeople firing wildly into the street at the bandits, Ianto ran for cover, it was clear they thought he was one of them. He found himself crouched behind a shop wall; swearing loudly as the townspeople’s round flew by occasionally taking a chunk out of the wall. There was a great splash as the gunfire mingled with the water on the ground from the pouring rain .

Ianto curled up and shouted for help as one round tore a large space out of his cover, even though he was screaming that he was not one of the bandits, the townspeople betrayed no sign on relenting their attack.
By now, the bandits had started to think better of it and were counting their winnings and leaving. None of them had fallen, but they were quickly riding out of the port and back into the marshy jungle.

“Ianto”!

Ianto looked around; Marley, Jimmy and Tony were running through the pouring rain and ringing gunfire to join him in cover. There was just enough space behind the building to stop them all from getting blown to pieces.

“SEE”!? Ianto heard Elza shout. “No harm done! See you again sometime Ianto”! And with that he rode off through the storm into the jungle with the other bandits. As quickly as it had started, the gunfire died down. Mudok port became eerily still, but it wasn’t over yet.

As soon as they thought it was safe Ianto, Marley and Jimmy crept out of their hiding place. For such an aggressive raid the town was virtually totally intact - minus a few shattered windows, broken doors and the Grub from the gun shop cowering feebly in a corner being comforted by his friends.

“We should get out of here”. Ianto said cautiously to Marley who nodded in agreement. They were casually making their way out of Mudok port when Ianto heard the unmistakable sound of guns being cocked behind him.

“Stay where you are”! Shouted a deep voice; turning round the four of them were confronted by a large group of townspeople.

“Oh no we’re not with them”! Jimmy yelled at the approaching crowd.
The townspeople were obviously not listening, soon Jimmy, Tony, Marley and Ianto were surrounded by a jeering crowd growing progressively closer and more threatening.

“You rotten criminals”! One of them shouted.

“We’re not with those bandits”! Ianto shouted as hundreds of hands grabbed them from all directions. “We’re not bandits”!!!


Without a single moment’s hesitation the group were tied up and knocked unconscious.