A man is driving along, when his wheel comes off in front of an insane asylum. One of the patients is stood outside having a cigarette. The driver gets out of the car, and asks the patient if he can see the nuts for the wheel. He can't. The patient says "Take one nut from every other wheel and use those."
"I wouldn't have thought of that in a million years," Says the driver. "Why are you in the mental hospital? You're not that bad."
The patient says "It's a hospital for the mentally disabled, not the chuffing stupid."
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A man walks into a zoo. There's nothing there but one dog. It was a shih-tzu.
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