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I'll show you how my relationship turned into a sexual one, if you like...
1. We (me, my late wife and late son), bought a puppy, we fell in love; well I did, I said that the puppy shines like a star amongst the rest, like the brightest diamond amongst seemingly ore.
2. First, my son died, then my wife; heart-broken for many years.
3. Although living with my colleague, I and my dog grew a deeper and deeper bond.
4. Just an example of lying their at night, stroking my dog softly, as they enjoy it.
5. Despite my colleague's opposite sex dog, they never had sex; they became very much protective of me, as I was with them.
6. Being my love, I wanted to give them the most utter devotion of love, passion, and pleasure; I could see that they started to get sexual with me, I mean, beyond implying, pure explicit interaction, even beyond my consent and intent.
7. I didn't want it at first, I thought it was utterly gross; but I realised that they wanted to have passion; becoming more and more protective and hedonistic, I kissed, they liked it; we had sex, we both liked (they more, though, I should think).
8. I devoted my research into zoophilia for the last two decades with lots of evidence.
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Oh dear god, he's right. This forum is shows up as the 5th result on Google for "zoophile forum". I'm so sorry, Alcar!
I'm also laughing my ass off right here but that's besides the point.
Anyway, on topic:
First of all, my sympathy for what has happened to your wife and son. That must have been terrible to go through, I can not even begin to imagine and I have lost both my parents.
However I must say that the loss of your loved ones is a direct cause for your perceived relationship with your dog. Your life fell apart, your dog was the only company you had left and from there you saw what you wanted to see. You wanted companionship, someone to cuddle and stuff like that. The idea of doing the dog probably occurred to you early on when you were still grossed out by it. But in time, without realizing it, you started looking for excuses to not be grossed out by it. When the dog put it's head on your lap you could have perceived that as a sexual advance without even realizing it, though it may sound stupid, stuff like that does happen. More then likely you have grown into zoophilia because of that traumatic event.
From a realistic perspective here I can not imagine your dogs ever making any kind of advance on you that you could perceive as sexual. Unless the dog unzipped your pants and started licking your junk with a lot of dedication I think most of the advances came from you, not the dog.
I for one will not deny that zoophilia is a weird thing. Unnatural? Totally. A moral challenge? Absolutely. You won't ever see my trying to convince people to accept zoophilia as it is not something that should be accepted to the same degree as homosexuality or anything. It should, however, be understood and that's a completely different matter. Understanding why zoophiles are zoophiles, understanding that not everyone has a sexual relation with their animal. Understanding that sexual relations zoophiles do have with an animal are not abusive (in terms of hurting the animals mentally or physically). In turn we, being the zoophiles, have to understand that people, even if they don't care or accept it, will still be freaked out and disgusted by it. You won't ever change that nor should you want to.
As for turning into a zoophile, I don't think anyone is born that way. I think every zoophile has their own point in history where something triggered an extraordinary love for animals. For most this is something in their childhood where they grew up in a bad household with abusive parents or something and the only comfort they had was the dog or the cat. Trauma like that can manifest itself in many ways, including zoophilia. More often than not the love for animals comes directly from a trust issue with humans. Someone who has been molested in his younger years is not going to trust other humans as easily and will put their trust into animals instead because they are always there for comfort.
At the end of the day you are who you are, though. If through some twisted course of fate you started to love dogs then you shouldn't feel bad for it. As long as you are not hurting anyone you're not doing anything wrong in my opinion.