[glitch taimer]

This is my first attempt at writing an Oddworld story. Please tell me what you think. Construcitve criticism wanted. Well, here I go.

Open for Slaugter
Chapter one
An Intentional Accdient

One lone slig marched down a long, winding hallway. He kept glancing back and forth, checking for any sign of danger. Though he would never admit it, the large, open area intimidated him. Finally, he reached the end of the hall and stopped at a sturdy steel door. A small rope hung near the door. The slig gave one long tug on the rope. Soon a voice came through on the speaker above the door.

“Please state your full identity,” another slig’s voice said.

“Slig 130492, Palms,” Palms said to the voice.

“Okay, you’ve been cleared for lunch.”

Palms rolled his eyes. The glukkons were so cheap; they created a system to eat just so nobody could slack off. He shrugged. At least the pay was pretty good.

The large metal door slowly opened to reveal a large room filled with tables and hundreds of industrial creatures dining on their lunches. Palms walked over to the long line for lunch and patiently waited. He studied the other diners to learn what was on the menu today. It looked like Scrab Cakes. Again. Palms grunted in disappointment. This was the third day in a row they were serving Scrab Cakes. Suddenly, his thoughts were interrupted when someone shoved him in the back. Palm’s turned around. The thing that had shoved him was a very haughty slig by the name of Kel.

“Lines movin’ ya’ know,” he said in a superior tone.

Palms cursed him under his breath and moved up in line. After a few minutes, he had his tray of Scrab Cakes and began to look for a table to sit at. He spied a slig across the room waving him over. The slig was one of his few friends in the factory. His name was Luke. Luke was very friendly and easy to get along with, but he wasn’t very bright.

Palms carried his tray over to Luke and sat down.

“So, what ya’ been up to?” Luke asked.

“Oh, same old stuff. Guarding a place that his in no danger whatsoever. I just stand around and pretend to look alert.”

Palms bit into one of his Scrab Cakes. Green custard oozed into his mouth. Luke’s tray was nearly empty. He probably had to go soon.

“Have you heard the rumors?” asked Luke. “They say people are hearing stuff up in the vents. Pretty creepy stuff if you asked me.”

Palms tried to look interested. Poor Luke would believe anything. If anything, it was probably ratz of a fleech that had gotten loose.

“No, I haven’t heard. Maybe it’s just a fleech or something.”

Palms picked up his second Scrab Cake and took a bite. He immediately regretted it and spit it back out onto his trey. The Scrab Cake had gone bad. A long time ago judging from the taste. Luke didn’t seem to notice.

“I dunno, but I need to get back to my position. See ya’ later, Palms.”

“Bye,” Palms said has Luke got up and exited the room. He stared at the rotten Scrab Cake on his plate. The custard had taken on a nice orange color. Not what one would call appetizing. He drank his water, threw his plate away, and left the room.

On his way back to his position, a little walkway outside the factory, he was stopped by another slig.

“We’re going to need you help. There’s been an accident near the storage area.”

Palms nodded. This kind of thing wasn’t unusual. Palms was one of the few sligs in the factory that had any kind of experience with repairing equipment. He was also bright, something quiet rare in sligs. He followed the other slig down many long halls and eventually to the long corridor that was right in front of the storage rooms. Palms could smell something burnt. He spotted the accident almost immediately.

A bloodied slig lay on the floor. It’s body was badly burnt and a its skull was bashed open. Next to it stood a malfunctioning greeter. Its sensors must have been damaged because it was trying to drive itself into a wall.

“What do you need me for?” Palms asked.

“The boss wants you to determine why the greeter went crazy.”

Palms approached the greeter carefully. He didn’t want to end up like the slig that lay on the floor a few feet away. Carefully, he grabbed a loose wire in the back of the greeter and yanked it. The wire unattached itself from the greeter. The greeter ceased its senseless activity and stood still. Palms pulled open a panel in the back of the greeter. The reason for the problem was obvious. The gears and wires inside of it were a mess. The gears were bent into abnormal shaped and some of the wires were completely severed.

“I think I found a problem. Everything inside this greeter is a mess,” Palms said aloud.

By now, a small crowd was gathering around the scene. The slig that had led Palms to the accident looked up at him.

“Don’t worry,” he said. “I’ll take care of the crowd if you tell me your best guess at what happened here.”

“Okay. In my mind, the most likely scenario is that something intentionally destroyed the insides of the greeter. If it had been an accident, the outside would have been damaged as well. From there, the greeter ran into this poor victim.” Palms pointed at the charred slig nearby. “It electrocuted him before getting stuck against this wall. But that leaves two mysteries to this case. Who damaged the greeter and what caused the head injury to the slig? It’s too precise to have been cause by the greeter.”

The other slig though about this for a few seconds. “We’ll have the vykkers perform and autopsy,” he finally declared.

“Okay, looks like my work here is done then. I’m going back to my position.”

With that, Palms left the scene and began his walk back to his guard position.