[scrab queen]

THE ORIGINAL IDEA WAS BY MISTUR! THE KNOCK OFF WAS BY NEMO! THE SPIN-OFF TO THE KNOCK OFF IS BY ME! I STILL DON'T OWN A FLYING DOGGIE TURD, ALTHOUGH IT WOULD BE HILARIOUS TO SEE IT FLOATING AROUND AND BUMPING INTO PEOPLE...

HAHA! SO THE FANFIC NOOB RETURNS!

Alright. If nemo could do it, so could I! This is just basically because my character only appeared twice, and was depicted in a sort of over-hyper-active kinda way. And I hate pink. Feel free to close it. I'll see how far I can get and how may chapters I make before someone closes it.

Another reason, I just wanted to keep the spirit of OWF alive, even if it's in a cheap, degrading sort of way. At least it should go on longer cause I'm usually a random weird person to begin with. It might turn out to be a load of crap, but there's nothing stopping me from laughing at it, or my stupidity later.


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OWF the untold legend 2.1: I can do anything that you can...



HAPPINESS

SADNESS

ANGER

THESE ARE THE MAJOR EMOTIONS DISPLAYED BY ANY LIVING CREATURE

THEY MIX LIKE THE THREE PRIMARY COLORS

THEY CAN BE CONDENSED OR DILUTED

THEY CAN CREATE A WHOLE NEW RANGE OF EMOTIONS

JOY

DEPRESSION

HATRED

THEY EXIST OUTSIDE OF THE PRIMAL EMOTIONS

FEAR

DISGUST

LUST

WHEN COMBINED IN CONTROLLED AMOUNTS THEY BECOME THE SOUL

WHEN THEY RUN RAMPANT THEY LEAD TO DISFUNCTION

INDIVIDUALLY THEY ARE USELESS

COMBINED THEY ARE HARMLESS

BUT WHEN ONE IS ALLOWED TO HOLD SWAY OVER THE OTHERS

THE SOUL BECOMES CORRUPT

EMOTIONS ARE

EMOTIONS ARE A GIFT

EMOTIONS ARE A BURDEN

EMOTIONS ARE PURITY

EMOTIONS ARE CORRUPTION

EMOTIONS ARE HUMAN

EMOTIONS ARE DISGUSTING

YOU WILL SOON WITNESS THEIR DOMAIN

YOU WILL SOON LEARN WHY THEY ARE OUTSIDE OF YOUR CONTROLL

YOU WILL SEE WHY THEY ARE KEPT AWAY FROM YOUR CONCIOUS ILLUSION

EMOTIONS ARE MALEVOLENT FORCES THAT MUST BE KEPT UNDER CONTROLL

DO NOT ALLOW YOURSELF TO BE FOOLED

NOW

IT IS TIME TO WAKE UP


She awoke to the scorching winds whipping about her limp form, invading her senses, and burning her lungs.

She sat up dazed. Her sand worn helmet lay just a few feet away. She stood, picked it up, and snapped it on, the pink clad spartan trying to recall what she was doing.

"Oh, right." She tossed the bikini aside. 'Usually when I pass out, it takes like, a week for me to wake up. They probably either did it by now, or Havoc got away.' She frowned. 'I was really looking forward to humiliating someone.' *shrug* "I guess i'll just have to find my way back."

She trudged off in the last known direction of the OWF. 'I need chocolate covered termites.'

The desert of ignorance was quite desolate, and if one spent too much time there, you became the dreaded n00b, doomed to a life of leet speak, grammatical errors, and immatureness.

"I'm too smart for that. I worked too hard to get into a normal society. I am not going back to team flam3rz0rz."

" OUR FL4G LE4D3R H45 R3TURN3D!!! OMFGZORZ!!!11111"

'aw, fuckberries.'

A red spartan came running at her, babbling and flailing his arms, and a black elite was running behind him, just screaming bloody murder.

"BLOODY MURDeR! BLOODY MURDER!!!"

She did the classic palm to face, before looking up and narrowing her eyes at the two intruders.

"Look, you had every opportunity to not interrupt my inner monolouge. What ever happens to you after this point is your own fault."

"HUHZORZ?"

"BLOODY MURDER!!! toast."

She sighed, and thought of this one's particular code. "Guezz wat?"

"WAT!"
"BLOODY MURDER!!"

"LOLSAMUSWAZAGURLZORZ!HAHAURSEXIST!IHAXUNOW!!!NESRULZ!!YOURSPACESUX.PIESUCKS,KAKERULES.MUTHA!!"

After her painful string of ignorance, the red spartan's head popped off, and poofed away. She then looked at the elite.

"BLARG."

"BLOODY MURD-" *pop* *poof*

She went on walking, ignoring the shouts about the flag tugging at her mind. All of a sudden...



*POOF*

She was standing at the gates of OWF. Her armor was black, and it hurt like hell. "WTF!!! WAT DA HELZORZ!!!! *hack, cough* ugh, it hurts to speak like that."

"Ah, It worked."

She turned to the source of the voice, and was faced with a small metroid.
"GAH! HOLYCRAPISMELLPANCAKES!"

From her recent position on the ground, and now a few good feet away from the thing, it happened to be a metroid, where a kabutop's face would be.

"Uh..."

"Kabutroid?"

"Yup."

"Oh, they did NOT just do that. As soon as I find out how to break the fourth wall, the author is gonna wish he/she was dead. So, how did you get here?"

Kabutroid just shrugged. "Well, I was repairing that life size ship model that samus broke, and one of the parts started flashing. There was something about crappy author cameos on it, and then I was here. So I used my randomness sensors and .god powers to locate someone who might recognize me. That happened to be you."

She stood up and brushed the sand off her scorched suit. "So, what can I do for ya?"

"I'd just like to know where I am, and whether or not that's a good thing."

"Well, being that I know your knack for humor and anti-climaxes in plot lines, it's a good thing. You're at Oddworld Forums."

He looked behind him and considered the large building. "A forums eh? It can't be that different from project jenova then."

She shook her head. "Try late nights at the IRC #zebth chat during the making of a memorable log."

"oh."

"I'm scrab queen by the way. Let's get you signed up, so you have a place to stay. I don't want to be the one responsible for a guest being eaten alive by a N00b."

______________________


They finally got to the building, which by Kabutroid's standards, was probably so big it was in the fifth dimention. "Like Kraid's ass!" scrab queen burst into a fit of giggles at her own joke. She was used to laughing by herself.

She opened the door and called in. "Hey guys! I'm back!"

Spirrow was just randomly walking through. "Sup. What the hell is that thing?" He discreetly inched away.

"He is a guest of mine, and a very famous person in his universe. We just had another dimention split."

"Wait, is it another one?"

"No, not a noob."

Spirrow relaxed a bit. "You should probably go find Mistur. He knew how to deal with the last one." He went off whistling an out of character tune.

She looked back at her guest. "You might get that for a while. Just don't get pissed and reveal your .god powers, otherwise the admins will revoke them."

"Sure, but if there isn't a good bar, then i'm getting ridley."

"But then you would have to bring the whole crew over."

He shrugged. "It would definatly liven up the place. So far this place has had nothing but tumbleweeds."

A tumble weed went rolling by just to eccentuate the point.

"Fine, let's get to the bar. You can go and get ridley if you find the booze unacceptable."


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GO ahead. Flame me. close it. I don't care. Good comments would be rare. an actual comment is even rarer. And no complaining if your character was depicted wrongly. It's not my fault that noone wants to meet me. Pm me for your ideas about how your character should be. Odd help my muses.