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Granted. You now have a sore left knee and a massive cut on your throat!... Causing you to die. Aw.
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Ouch, reversed pains.
Granted, you open your presents today. Little do you know that your parents and friends hadn't bought you anything yet since your birthday wasn't today and they weren't ready with all the gifts. You open one, and see nothing inside. Muhahaha-again!
I wish I was less evil.