My apologies, Zozo. I can be a bit blunt at times.
Hey, but it's better than just flat out telling him it's good. Sure, he'll be encouraged, but he won't break out of this kind of writing. I consider telling him the truth will force him to get better.
Minch, you certainly have potential, but you're going to have to step up your game if you want that potential to shine through.
I still see numerous grammatical and spelling errors, I suggest using spell check, like I have before. I understand if it's one or two, since nobody is perfect, but there's too many to get by on this excuse. Story is interesting, but the details are a bit lacking.
Definitely an improvement, but it's still falling a bit short.
5/10
Keep in mind I have no expertise in this area, I am merely basing my opinions on my own thoughts. Thus I could be horribly, terribly wrong, and this could be a best seller yet to be discovered.
Though, if I may be so bold, I doubt it.
Minch, keep it up, and I am sure you will become quite good.
Zozo, again, my apologies for not being gentle.
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