[Alf Shall Rise]

You mean like this?

EDIT: I see some of you think my story is poor...and to make them happy, I'm re-making mine! The story is similar, only not at a mansion, and it is much more detailed and longer. Nemo, I know what you mean; the chapters are short, I agree, thats why I plan to make my new and improved first chapter a big hit! To act all professional, lemme tell yall the release date of it: Thursday. Lol, not so far off, but I need to think of some stuff, and then type it up...if I can ever get on this laptop!

Anyway, I'll be going now, bro needs laptop cuz I used it after school yesterday.

EDIT 2: My newest first chapter! Yes, it isn't Thursday, but I finished! Sorry if anyone liked the earlier story; it's now changed. Enjoy!

There was a new announcement at the OWF. Apparently Alcar won a contest and got ten free tickets to a carnival, and he wanted to know who was willing to go with him. Numerous PMs were sent to him, and only two more people had to tag along. But no one seemed to volunteer, and only eight people were going to the carnival.

Each volunteer got a PM saying where and when to come to the carnival. The PM was, "5 PM to 12 AM, on the up coming Friday, two days from this day. Go to the bus stop on Mudanchee Avenue." Everyone agreed, and waited until Friday. On Thursday, two PMs were sent to Alcar saying they wanted to come with everyone to the carnival. Of course, they were Alf_shall_rise and MoxCo. Executive.

Friday finally came, and everyone packed their bags for the carnival. At exactly 4 PM, they all met at the bus stop.
"Hey everyone! This is so cool, all ten of us going on a trip to a carnival! Sounds fun!" Jordan_Boi cheered, all the others raised their fists in the air and cheered. Looks like everyone was going to have some fun! The bus pulled over, and at the entrance was Alcar.

"Alrighty then, everyone jump in! We're going to the carnival!" he announced, everyone trampled over him and sat down. Getting up from stepped on numerous times, Alcar held his back and sat in the front, right next to SligStorm. He heard the words, "Yay, yay, yay" over and over from the little pale Slig.

After only ten minutes on the bus, people starting groaning and moving around in discomfort.
"Everyone, start moving around like you have ants in yer pants!" Alcar exclaimed.
"Are we there yet?" someone cried out, it sounded like a Greeter. Alcar ignored the cry, and started to close his eyes. "Well I'll just have to sleep the ride away," he thought, drifting off to sleep. He awoke immediately from the sound of bored screams, it was like listening to a broken record.

Alcar's eyes opened up when he realized he got twenty minutes of sleep. That's a new record of sleeping while with the members from the OWF. Now, if he got awarded a big chocolate cake, everything would've been great. But instead someone spit in his face.
"Alright alright, we can walk there now, since someone just shot some of their flem onto my damn face," Alcar yelled, shoving all the members out of the bus. He turned around to apologize to the bus driver. "So sorry for all this stuff, they usually behave...right now they're all acting like two year olds," Alcar said, then gave the bus driver ten Moolah, and walked out of the bus. He gave them all a scary look that told them, "I'm real pissed, so don't do anything stupid."

The passed two hours was great, everyone stood in a straight line and didn't yell or anything. Something Alcar appreciated.
"You all were good while walking, so I'll give you all something in return; we all get to stay here a week longer!" he yelled out in public, people were looking at him. All the members looked around, their eyes wide open. There were roller coasters, tea cup rides, bouncy castles, bumber cars, cotton candy shops, fast food shops, everything you could think of!

First things first, Paramite of War immediately rolled to the Mystery Mirror Maze. POW saw all sorts of sizes of himself in mirrors, and soon got lost. He was alone, and every so often he would see red eyes pop up in the dark, black, silent shadows. There was this one hallway, it was very long, and had a bunch of mirrors on it. When walked looking at these mirrors, he didn't see any reflection at all. "I'm getting pretty scared," he thought to himself, turned around, and saw the red eyed creature pounce on him.