Meh, sorry for not posting this yesterday. I'm becoming a total lazy slob.
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Chapter 7: Impossibility Alert
"Ahhhhh. Home at last." Mitsur sighed as OWF's building came into view. He was speeding across the hot, dry desert ground in a hover car, surrounded by similar vehicles transporting everyone back. His hair blew back in the wind, and Jordan honked his horn, which played La Cucaracha.
Finally, the huge group of vehicles reached the building, and they all settled to the ground, kicking up a huge cloud of dust. He was temporarily blinded, as was everyone else. Eventually, though, it settled, and Mitsur got out of his car. He walked up to the front door, and tried the door. Locked.
"Wha...?"
By now, all the other members had reached the door.
"What's going on?" Snuzi asked.
"I dunno," Mitsur said, "The doors are usually open all the time."
"Weird..." Splat remarked.
"Wait," Arxryl said, pointing. "Who's that behind the glass?"
"Who?" Mitsur said, cupping his hands around his eyes to see into the
building better. He could vaguely make out a grinning figure, with a jester's cap on. He groaned.
"Oh, great." He muttered.
"Wait, is that...Bullet Magnet?" Slaveless said, incredulous.
"Yeah...he must have run out of dried frog spleen again..." Mitsur said.
"Wonderful..." Statikk muttered. "Someone go get Alcar. He'll get them open."
"On it!" Munch said, and dashed off, but not before slamming into a wall. Twice.
"So....what now?" Dripik asked.
"I dunno," Mitsur replied. "I guess we just wait."
And wait they did. Time stretched on. The sun fell to the horizon. Bullet was checked on repeatedly, until they saw that he had apparently passed out onto the carpet. Then, every five minutes or so, they would scout the horizon for Alcar, or at least Munch. Finally, Havoc got up, and brushed himself off.
"Screw this," Havoc said. "I'm gonna go find them myself."
"Whatever," Rexy said, still sore about her bikini. Mitsur noticed she still ad it on. He'd lost interest, however by the fifth jumping jack.
Havoc ran off, and they all settled down to wait. Mitsur leaned his head against one of the stone pillars, covered himself in a blanket, and fell asleep. Everyone else found a spot to curl up on.
***
Sunlight flooded Mitsur's eyelids.
"Hmmm? Is it morning already?" He muttered. He opened his eyes. Rexy's face, huge because of it's close proximity, looked at him with interest. Behind her, Skillya, Queen, Stranger's Maid, and Ambi looked around her shoulder at him.
"WHAT THE F-"
"Oh, come on. It wasn't that scary." She said impatiently, still staring at him intensely.
"What happened while I was asleep? And why are you all staring at me? Is their something on my face? Did my intense good looks finally get through to you all? And why aren't the doors open already? Is Bullet dead? Why am I asking you all these questions?"
Rexy blinked.
"Nothing, really. Er...I'll get back to you on that one. No, their's nothing on your face. No, they were never there in the first place. That's what we're looking at you for. No, he's eating pancakes right now. Because you're confused, apparently because this is the first time you've seen a female face when you've woken up. Oooooo, buuuurn!" She said, simultaneously answering all of his questions.
"Riiiiiiiiiight. So what do you want?"
"We want you to go look for Havoc and Munch. We don't know where they are."
"Why me? Why not Splat, or Rich, or Jordan, or Arx-" He was cut off as Rexy put a hand over his mouth.
"Just shut up. I don't know why we're sending you, but some higher being is making us make you go. Don't question the Great Cheese Llama."
"Wait, that religion was a joke I made u-"
"Silence, you fool! Just go!"
"Fine, fine. Whatever." Mitsur pushed himself up. "But really, why are all the female members here?"
"We thought that you might be pressured to act all brave and heroic in front of women."
"Eh. That works for me. See you guy-uh, girls-later hopefully."
"Buh-bye. Now go find them so I can get inside and serve my food." Rexy
said, waving half-heartedly, and turning away.
"And so I can go make more pretty art!" SM yelled.
"So I can go do...uh....whatever I usually do!" Skillya said.
"So I can go back to petting SeaRex!" Ambi cried.
"To eat pancakes!"
"Peanut butter jelly time!"
Mitsur kept walking, and crested the first dune. He looked into the distance, and turned around.
"Hey guys!" He yelled.
"WHAT?" Everyone else yelled back.
"I found them!"
"WHAT!?"
"Yeah, come see!"
Everyone stampeded up the dune, and crested it. Everyone groaned when they saw what had happened.
Munch sat in the sand, counting out a wad of Monopoly money, while Havoc moved a pewter car around a board game of Monopoly, making vroom noises with his mouth. Alcar shook his hands together, and everyone heard the dice inside.
"Come on, come on! Daddy needs a new car!" He said, and threw down his dice. He moved his piece, and landed on chance, and then picked up a card.
"Woohoo! I got a get out of jail free card! Take that, bitch!" He yelled, and looked up. Munch and Havoc looked up, as well.
"Oh, hey guys!" Havoc said brightly, "Wanna play?"
***
After the massive beating of Havoc, Munch, and even Alcar, the doors were opened, and everyone finally stumbled into their beds, but not before waking up Bullet Magnet, giving him his meds, and then punching him hard enough to knock him out cold again.
"Wow..." Mitsur sighed. "What a day..."
"You're telling me," Statikk said, appearing behind him. "But at least I found an easy button, even if it doesn't work."
"Really? I've never seen one up close. Pull it out." Snuzi said, coming out of nowhere.
Statikk obliged, and took out a small, red button. However, the letters that spelled out
EASY were not on it.
"Weird," Splat said,
also coming out of nowhere. "Press it, let's see what happens!"
"Sure," Statikk said. His finger plunged toward the button.
"
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!"
Statikk's finger froze.
"What was that?" He said, confused.
"I dunno," Mitsur said. "Just press the button."
Statikk shrugged, and his finger resumed moving toward it.
"
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
"Okay, now it's clos-" Statikk was cut off as Havoc jumped out of nowhere and tackled him. The button was thrown into the air, and spun.
"
Someone catch it! Don't let it press down!" Havoc yelled desperately. No one moved.
The button hit the ground, face down, and the button was pushed with a small
click.
Mitsur felt as if someone had punched him in the stomach, and doubled over. He closed his eyes from pain.
"Ugh..."
After staying still for a few moments, Mitsur looked back up, and opened his eyes, and screamed.
"Jesus, that hu-
HOLY MANGO WAFFLES!"
Mitsur had been transported to his worst nightmare.
He had entered the Pink Bunny Planet.
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Dun dun duuuuuuuuun.
And so, the nefarious powers of the Impossibility Button begin their work. Will they reign unchecked? Who knows!
Anyways, generic sorry-for-taking-so-long and generic mistakes typing.